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Mary's Ass
Accordion tune into Mary's Ass very good song rendition)
(Galway Bay)
You've asked for a story, I will sing, I will tell,
About a young lady I knew very well
Her name it was Mary, a beautiful lass,
And the song I will sing, is about Mary's ass.
A present to Mary her uncle did make
For whenever she went for some exercise to take
This donkey or mule? Sure take your choice
One that's gay and so frisky with beautiful voice.
Now early next morning young Mary was out
And all round the town was seen riding about
It was the talk of the twon, north, east, west and south
In fact, Mary's ass was in everyone's mouth.
When tired of this, she would gallop back home
Her ass would be covered with sweat and with foam
She'd cry out to the groom: grab a handful of grass
Come down to the stable and wipe down my ass.
Now Joe who sells greens has a moke very old
It is bony and lean from starvation and cold
And when he meets Mary, which often occurs
How he wishes his ass was as handsome as hers
Now early one morning as Mary did pass
A lad with a straw slyly tickled her ass
The mule gave a bolt down a hole it did go
And over its shoulder poor Mary did throw
They carried her home she recovered next day
But her ass it was left in the hall where it lay
It's poor neck was broken, god bless my soul
And the people all round called it Mary's ass hole.
And Mary regretted the loss of her ass
And oft time at evening by there she would pass
And lately I've noticed as by there I stroll
There's some very bad smells from Mary's ass hole.