|
The Lobster Song
This can be sung to the tune of "I Feel So Lonely" by Elvis.
Oh mister fisherman
home from the sea
have you got a lobster
you can sell to me?
Chorus - either
(Elvis)
I feel so lonely baby,
I feel so lonely baby,
I feel so lonely I could die
Oh yes sir, yes sir
I have three
and the biggest of the bastards
I shall sell to thee
Chorus
So I took the lobster home
and I couldn't find a dish
so I put it in the place
where the missus has a piss
Chorus
And half way through the night
as you well know,
up gets the missus
to let the waters flow
Chorus
Well first I heard a groan
and then I heard a grunt
and there was the lobster
hanging from her cunt
Chorus
So the missus grabs the poker
and I grabbed the broom
and we chased the fucking lobster
around and round the room
Chorus
Well we hit it on the head
and we beat it on the side
and we hit the fucking lobster
until the bastard died
Chorus
There's a moral to this story
the moral is this,
Always have a shuftie
before you have a piss
Chorus
That's the end of the story
there is no more,
there's an apple up my arse
and you can have the core
Back to Song Book Home
|