Barnacle Bill
"Who's that knocking at my door, Who's that knocking at my door, Who's that knocking at my door," Cried the fair young maiden.
"It's only me from over the sea," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor, "I'm hard to windward and hard alee," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor, "I've newly come upon the shore, And this is what I'm looking for, A jade, a maid, or even a whore," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor.
"I'll come down and let you in, I'll come down and let you in, I'll come down and let you in," Cried the fair young maiden.
"Well, hurry before I bust the door," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor, "My arse is tight, my temper's raw," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor, "I'm so wound up, I'm afraid to stop, I'm looking for meat or I'm going to pop, A rag, a bone with a cherry on top," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor.
"Oh, your whiskers scrape my cheeks, Oh, your whiskers scrape my cheeks, Oh, your whiskers scrape my cheeks," Cried the fair young maiden.
"I'm dirty and lousy and full of fleas," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor, "I'll put my mast in whom I please," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor, "My flowing whiskers give me class, The sea horses ate them instead of grass, If they hurt your cheeks, they'll tickle your ass," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor.
"Tell me that we'll soon be wed, Tell me that we'll soon be wed, Tell me that we'll soon be wed," Cried the fair young maiden.
"You foolish girl, it's nothing but sport," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor, "I've got me a wife in every port," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor, "Off I'll go on another tack To give some other fair maid a crack, But keep it oiled till I come back," says Barnacle Bill the Sailor.
- Oscar Brand
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Every Inch A Sailor
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