EMAIL ARTICLE   LINK TO ARTICLE   PRINT ARTICLE Article Published: Monday, December 13, 2004 - 4:47:34 PM PST The 12 days of rummying On the first day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me a Saddam pigeon in a palm tree. Not knowing Osama's address, Rummy hastened to 'Potamia --and a mess, exhorting his pal Cheney, "Let's bomb Baghdad again, golly gee!" On the second day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me two dead-ender turtle doves (Colin and Kofi), flowers and chocolates from the ninny Chalabi, and a billion Arabs mad at me. On the third day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me three French henpeckers and imaginary W.M.D. And 300 tons of lost explosives going BOOM! everywhere. Rummy tried for a Vin Diesel movie, when he should have heeded General Shinseki. On the fourth day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me four cuckoo birds -- Wolfie, Perle, Feith and Condi. The cost of empire on the cheap will be steep. How did Rummy get a job guarantee? On the fifth day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me five Pentagon rings. Rummy wanted to go down in history by transforming the military. But many GIs feel cheated, that their forces and materiel are depleted. Stop Loss and Stuff Happens, by Jiminy! On the sixth day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me six German shepherds teeth a-baring. A hooded man attached to wires, Abu Ghraib and Army liars, Red Cross in the dark about dogs that liked to bark. On the seventh day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me regime change that wasn't free, our troops sitting ducks for IED (Improvised Explosive Devices, dear me) Rummy is another sort of IED (Instant Excuses for Disaster, "I'm an old man, don't you see?") On the eighth day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me eight Osama videotapes. The Bushie fever with Saddam left Osama free to scram. Invading Iraq was an Xmas gift for bin Laden -- a recruiting lift. On the ninth day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me Iran and North Korea on a nuclear buildup spree. Nine mullahs a-proliferating, as our military's straining. The Bushies were fixated on Iraq, but Saddam's weapons were merely the mock. On the tenth day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me ten Gitmo lawyers a-leaping. What cares he about civil liberty? On the eleventh day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me eleven generals a-hyping that the war is just dandy, while our spooks are warning that civil war and theocracy are a-borning as the Kid in the Oval feels free to consult a Higher Authority. Burkas, turbans and beards you'll see after the puppet Allawi. On the twelfth day of Christmas, my Rummy sent to me a brave grunt from Tennessee griping about his unarmored Humvee. No twelve drummers drumming, but twelve soldiers thrumming, complaints to Rummy keep coming, but the septuagenarian's not admitting that the Iraq resistance isn't quitting. The Ghost of Christmas Past, Mekong Delta, is clanking after Rummy in Samarra. Eleven generals spinning, Ten Gitmo lawyers not grinning, Nine Iranian mullahs Iraq annexing, Eight Osama tapes perplexing, Seven bombs a-scaring, Six German geese bewaring, Five Pentagon rings, Four cuckoos a-raving, Three French hens appeasing, Two dead doves, And a Saddam pigeon sparking an insurgency. 6721.357 Wednesday 22 December ‘ While looking forward Afghan soldiers version of ’12 Days’, partially transcribed by my wife from news, I found this several versions of anti – War version.. pretty poor quality, hate and politics rather than humour, but worth putting in archives as comparison to what soldiers versions have to say, and how they say it.