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BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ????
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Subject: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: GUEST,William Bottom Date: 22 Jan 14 - 12:37 PM So what's the origins of colloquial "No 1s & No 2s" ? Anyone any idea of earliest usage ? [military/industrial, perhaps ?] Is it just a British euphemism ? |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: GUEST Date: 22 Jan 14 - 01:14 PM The repetition here is ghastly. There was a thread on this ten years ago. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: GUEST Date: 22 Jan 14 - 01:24 PM BTW, do you wear Bill Bottom trousers? |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Jack the Sailor Date: 22 Jan 14 - 01:37 PM GUEST, if you are going to be pithy (pissy?) you might as well identify yourself to take credit. Two is rhyming slang with poo it says in the Urban dictionary but then wouldn't pee be number three? |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: JohnInKansas Date: 22 Jan 14 - 02:01 PM Anyone can end up with an "anonymous guest" post if they don't notice that their cookie got crunched, but there's no credit associated with it. Instead, we're permitted to BLAME THE PERSON THUS POSTING for every anonymous GUEST post ever made here. (There are lots of them, and the burden of SHAME is immense, even if unwittingly done.) The "Number 1" and "Number2" usage is common in the US, so it's not just a Brit euphemisim, but I suspect its origins predate rhyming slang (which is pretty much British?) since mommy's have been averse to having their kid yell "Mommy, I gotta SHIT!" in public during potty training for a very long time. But is it really called a Crapper because it was invented by someone with that name? (Opinions vary.) John |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: GUEST Date: 22 Jan 14 - 02:23 PM Thomas Crapper didn't invent shit! :0) |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Jack the Sailor Date: 22 Jan 14 - 02:40 PM Unus vel duorum νούμερο ένα ή νούμερο δύο |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Jeri Date: 22 Jan 14 - 04:20 PM Crapper just installed crappers, I think. Nobody invented shit. It just happens. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Bert Date: 22 Jan 14 - 04:37 PM It just happens, nice one Jeri. Yep Number two is rhyming slang for poo, a pee is less than a poo so it got relegated to Number one. Actual rhyming slang for a pee is Jimmy, from Jimmy Riddle - piddle. Also hit and a miss - piss. Other rhyming slang for poo is 'Pony and Trap' and 'Tom Tit' |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: gnu Date: 22 Jan 14 - 08:00 PM Hahahahaha. Now, this is Mudcat BS at it's finest. An inane thread title followed by creative posts. Yees are a laff a minute! |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Ebbie Date: 22 Jan 14 - 11:06 PM At one time I was a caregiver for an elderly woman. One day I ensconced her on the toilet when she announced she had to 'go'. Came back a few minutes later, asked her if she'd had results. Her cheerful answer: Nope. Just wind and water. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Bert Date: 23 Jan 14 - 03:06 AM All wind and piss as we'd say Ebbie, which also can refer to somebody who is all talk and no action. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: JohnInKansas Date: 23 Jan 14 - 08:09 PM According to the famous poet "Anonymous:" In days of old when knights were bold And toilets weren't invented, They left their load beside the road And went their way contented. (Some of the other varianrs are rather rude.) John |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: GUEST Date: 23 Jan 14 - 08:19 PM Here stand I, broken hearted- Payed a penny and only farted. Trad (Manny A. Bogwall) |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Bert Date: 23 Jan 14 - 08:23 PM Thread drift (Thanks John). In days of old when knights were bold and women weren't invented Men drilled holes in telegraph poles and shagged away contented. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Bert Date: 23 Jan 14 - 08:26 PM There's no paper in the bogs in Mobile There's no paper in the bogs in Mobile There's no paper in the bogs so they sit there 'till it clogs and they saw it into logs in Mobile. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: JohnInKansas Date: 23 Jan 14 - 11:58 PM Further drift - I've mentioned that I've been scanning bunches of books to make them digital and get them off the bookshelves. One I scanned recently was titeld "The Limerick." The (plain brown wrapper) dust jacket included: "This is the largest collection of limericks, erotic or otherwise, ever published. None of the 1700 examples herein are otherwise." You might guess that the editor was G. Legman, if you've heard of him. John |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: MGM·Lion Date: 24 Jan 14 - 01:13 AM Oh, yes: Gershon Legman, great authority on the topic. I remember once reviewing his "Rationale of the Dirty Joke", which I still have. His thesis IIRC [long time since read it right thru] is that all such jokes are based on castration fears. His example jokes printed in itals, making it convenient to pick them out just to read. ~M~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: GUEST,Musket Date: 24 Jan 14 - 01:14 AM Teacher! Quick! Give me a number, I'm about to fart. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: MGM·Lion Date: 24 Jan 14 - 02:59 AM Re Legman: Not just castration, I now recall, but fear of the vagina dentata, the cunt that will bite a man's prick right off, is his identification of the ubiquitous theme of the dirty joke, his eponymous "rationale". |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Nigel Parsons Date: 24 Jan 14 - 04:32 AM but fear of the vagina dentata, the cunt that will bite a man's prick right off Yes, I remember the story. The young lad had been told by his mother that if he ever put his 'thing' up there, it would get bitten off. On his wedding night his bride tries to entice him to procreation. He tells her, "you're not catching me like that", and goes on to relate what his mother has told him. The young bride grabs him by the hair (on his head) and drags him down between her legs, "Look, NO TEETH!" "Yes" says the lad,"It's not surprising with gums like that" |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Musket Date: 24 Jan 14 - 06:35 AM On that bombshell. When I was a young lad, before my balls dropped and I was curious about girls but not sure what the bog wall graffiti meant, I recall my big brother say to his mate of a girl, "She'd suck you in and blow you out in bubbles." I remember thinking I couldn't wait to find out what that meant! I was contemplating what shape, texture and indeed origin the bubble had. They say it is better to anticipate on the journey than to arrive, but to be fair, the fringe benefits outweigh the disappointment. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Roger the Skiffler Date: 24 Jan 14 - 09:35 AM ...is this the place to mention(again) the slogan on the lorry of the firm I saw who were delivering portable toilets to an event: "X (name of firm) Number One in the number Twos business". Rts |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Nigel Parsons Date: 24 Jan 14 - 09:38 AM the fringe benefits outweigh the disappointment. "Fringe benefits"? Trimmed then, but not totally shaven, I assume? |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: gnu Date: 24 Jan 14 - 09:43 AM This thread is goin right down the crapper. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Nigel Parsons Date: 24 Jan 14 - 10:19 AM That's alright, we're already 'round the bend'. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: JohnInKansas Date: 24 Jan 14 - 02:58 PM On the original subject of "No. 2," important scientific research has shown: Why sloths go down stairs to poop Tanya Lewis LiveScience Jan. 22, 2014 Sloths are the quintessential couch potatoes of the rainforest, and these sluggish tree-dwellers also serve as a hotel for moths and algae. Three-toed sloths descend from the trees once a week to defecate, providing a breeding ground for moths that live in the animals' fur and nourishing gardens of algae that supplement the sloths' diet, new research finds. Leaving the trees burns energy and makes sloths easy prey for predators, but the benefits of a richer diet appear to be worth the perils. "Important interspecific interactions — between sloths, their moths and algae — seem to be reinforcing, or even dictating, important aspects of sloth behavior, especially their ritualized behavior of descending the tree to defecate," wildlife ecologist Jonathan Pauli of the University of Wisconsin-Madison, leader of the study published today (Jan. 21) in the journal Proceedings of the Royal Society B, told LiveScience in an email. ... ***** I guess if you're a couch potato so slow that moss grows on you, it probably would be a good idea to leave the couch before you "Do Two." Cleaning up would be a lot of work. It's a little surprising that an animal like this would be successful at agriculture, raising their own critters and crops for food. My friends in that business all say "it's hard work;" but of course the sloths don't have to worry about marketing, storage, and shipping. ... John |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: gnu Date: 24 Jan 14 - 06:51 PM No wonder I am always tired. I crap every day, at least. The sloth is wise... and well regulated. Imagine if they knew about Spaw! They would form a movement. |
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Subject: RE: BS: No 1s & No 2s [Bodily functions] ???? From: Bert Date: 24 Jan 14 - 11:12 PM There's a hole in the bottom of the she. |
