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BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee
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BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee |
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Subject: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: gnu Date: 25 Nov 11 - 10:51 AM Date Listed 23-Nov-11 Last Edited 24-Nov-11 Price $900.00 Address Moncton, NB, Canada View map Do you like shoveling snow? Then stop reading this and go back to your pushups and granola because you are not someone that I want to talk to. Let's face it, we live in a place that attracts snow like Magnetic Hill attracts cars, only that ain't an illusion out there. That's 12 inches of snow piling up and, oh, what's that sound? Why it's the snow plow and it's here to let you know that it hates you and all the time you spent to shovel your driveway. Did you want to get out of your house today? Were you expecting to get to work on time? Or even this week? You gave it your best shot. You tried to shovel by yourself and I respect you for that. I did it, my parents did it, some of my best friends did it. But deep down inside, we all wanted to murder that neighbor with the snowblower who was finished and on his second beer while you were still trying to throw snow over a snowbank taller than you are. So, here we are. You could murder your neighbour, which could ensure that you won't need to shovel a driveway for 25 to life, but there are downsides to that too. What to do? Here's the deal. I have a snow blower and I want you to own it. I can tell you're serious about this. It's like I can almost see you: sitting there, your legs are probably crossed and your left hand is on your chin. Am I right? How'd I do that? The same way that I know that YOU ARE GOING TO BUY THIS SNOWBLOWER. I want you to experience the rush that comes with smashing through a snowdrift and blowing that mother trucker out of the way. The elation of seeing the snow plow come back down your street and watching the look of despair as your OTHER neighbour gets his shovel out once more while you kick back with a hot cup of joe (you don't have a drinking problem like that other guy). Here's what you do. You go to the bank. You collect $900. You get your buddy with a truck and you drive over here. You give me some cold hard cash and I give you a machine that will mess up a snowbank sumthin' fierce. I've even got the manual for it, on account of I bought it brand new and I don't throw that kind of thing away. Don't want to pay me $900? Convince me. Send me an offer and I'll either laugh at you and you'll never hear back from me or I'll counter. You want a snow blower. You need a snow blower. This isn't some entry level snow blower that is just gonna move the snow two feet away. This is an 11 HP Briggs and Stratton machine of snow doom that will cut a 29 inch path of pure ecstasy. And it's only 4 years old. I dare you to find a harder working 4 year old. My niece is five and she gets tired and cranky after just a few minutes of shoveling. This guy just goes and goes and goes. You know what else? I greased it every year to help keep the water off it and the body in as good as shape as possible. It's greasier than me when I was 13, and that's saying something. You know how many speeds it has? Six forward and two in reverse. It goes from "leisurely" slow up to "light speed". Seriously, I've never gone further than five because it terrifies me. I kid you not, you could probably commute to work with it dragging you. You know what else is crappy about clearing snow in the morning? That you have to do it in the dark. Well, not anymore! It has a halogen headlight that will light your way like some kind of moveable lighthouse (only better, because lighthouses won't clear your driveway). Oh, and since it's the 21st century, this snow blower comes with an electric starter. Just plug that sucker in, push the button, and get ready to punch snow in the throat. If you want to experience what life was like in olden days, it comes with a back-up cord you could pull to start it, but forget that. The reason you're getting this fearsome warrior was for the convenience, so why make it harder on yourself? By this point, you're probably wondering why I would sell my snowblower since the first snowpocalypse is upon us today. I'll tell you why: because I heard it was time for you to man up and harness some mighty teeth and claws and chew your way to freedom, that's why. This is my snow blower. Make it your snow blower. UPDATE - I assure you that the snowblower is real, and it is still available. Do not despair if you have made an offer on this glorious tribute to man's triumph over nature and I have not responded yet, your time has yet to come. Visits: 201186 |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: bobad Date: 25 Nov 11 - 10:59 AM Strong link between shovelling snow, heart attacks: Study By QMI Agency KINGSTON, Ont. — It's a common sight in the winter — Canadians with mittens, boots and shovels digging out from under a snowstorm. A new study has shown that, if you are in a particular high-risk group, this is an activity that can kill you. Researchers at Queen's University and Kingston General Hospital have confirmed what only anecdotal evidence has previously suggested: Snow shovelling really can lead to heart attacks. Dr. Adrian Baranchuk, a professor with the Queen's School of Medicine and a cardiologist at KGH, said the idea for the study began on a Saturday morning about three winters ago when he noticed something odd while doing rounds in the coronary care unit. "Over 14 people had a heart attack associated with snow shovelling," he recalled. "This is something that motivates research." The researchers reviewed two consecutive winters, 2008-09 and 2009-10, and plotted the duration of the winter and when it snowed. They noted the admissions to KGH with heart attacks within that time and divided them into shovelling and non-shovelling groups. Of the 500 patients who came in with heart problems, 35 had experienced symptoms while out shovelling. They found it was mainly men who were doing the snow shovelling and suffered subsequent heart attacks. The vast majority of women who had heart attacks hadn't done any snow shovelling. They found two main risk factors — simply being a male gives you a five-fold bigger chance of having an acute coronary syndrome while shovelling, and if you have a family history of coronary artery disease, you are also at greater risk. Smoking also placed a male at higher risk, the researchers found, and older males seemed more susceptible than younger ones. Baranchuk said the time of day is also a factor. "Usually this is done early in the morning because you need to take your car, and it is well demonstrated that heart attacks do happen early in the morning," he said. The pace of snow shovelling is another contributing factor. Long periods of hard work followed by a brief period of time to catch your breath is the typical way someone shovels out their driveway. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: Ed T Date: 25 Nov 11 - 11:38 AM Is this the model? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: Sandy Mc Lean Date: 25 Nov 11 - 06:24 PM That's a load of shit Ed! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: Bill D Date: 25 Nov 11 - 08:21 PM "Fling it here- Fling it there!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: Charley Noble Date: 26 Nov 11 - 05:39 PM gnu- Nah, I'll just shovel the back parking lot another winter. I love to shovel. And I love it even more when the town snowplow leaves a new bank of snow at the head of my parking lot... $900, you say? Delivered to Richmond, Maine? Cheerily, Charley Noble |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: gnu Date: 26 Nov 11 - 06:40 PM "I love to shovel." Shit? Heheheee! I have never met anyone who LOVES to shovel snow. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: bobad Date: 26 Nov 11 - 09:49 PM I can't say that I love it but I really don't mind shovelling my 100 meter long driveway, especially if it's not too windy out. It gives me a reason to get some outdoor excercise in the winter other than the daily dog walk. I have a really good, low friction ergonomic scoop like this one which takes much of the stress of lifting off, you more or less just push and dump. Of course I don't do it manually when we get a really big dump or reall wet snow. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: gnu Date: 26 Nov 11 - 09:58 PM Oh? What do you use then? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: bobad Date: 26 Nov 11 - 10:02 PM I either borrow a neighbour's snowblower or I have another neighbour with a tractor mounted blower who often does it for me. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: gnu Date: 26 Nov 11 - 10:05 PM Nice backup. Especially the guy with the tracor. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: bobad Date: 26 Nov 11 - 10:28 PM Yeah, he's a good guy - I let him hunt on my land and he gives us two deer every year. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: gnu Date: 26 Nov 11 - 11:00 PM Two deer... mmmm... tastey! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: frogprince Date: 27 Nov 11 - 01:40 AM But gnu, this sounds kinda like the guy who has a really super car to sell ya; like, if it's that great, why does he want to sell it??? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: frogprince Date: 27 Nov 11 - 01:45 AM Pfffft; I started thinking "what the hell is kijji", so I glanced back up at the first post; I was thinkin' it was gnu who had some clapped out blower he was tryin' to hustle to us. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Snowblower ad on kijji... hehehee From: gnu Date: 27 Nov 11 - 06:48 AM Nope. But it is rather "puffing", innnit? |
