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BS: Joe Shlobotnik

Rapparee 12 Jun 06 - 09:36 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jun 06 - 10:01 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jun 06 - 10:08 PM
Rapparee 12 Jun 06 - 10:25 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jun 06 - 10:34 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Jun 06 - 10:39 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 12 Jun 06 - 10:45 PM
Little Hawk 12 Jun 06 - 10:51 PM
Rapparee 12 Jun 06 - 10:53 PM

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Subject: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 09:36 PM

What ever became of Charlie Brown's favorite baseball player, anyway?


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Subject: RE: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 10:01 PM

He retired and is running a fast food franchise.


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Subject: RE: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 10:08 PM

Hmmm...

Well, here is the whole sad story of Joe Shlabotnik:

The Joe Shlabotnik Story: From rags to.......rags?


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Subject: RE: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 10:25 PM

Oh, I'm glad to know he's not forgotten!


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Subject: RE: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 10:34 PM

Joe Shlabotnik was a baseball player in the world of Peanuts. Charlie Brown considered Joe his favorite player, and spent much of his free time trying to hunt down Joe memorabilia -- baseball cards, autographs, personal meetings, what have you. Charlie Brown even organized a Joe Shlabotnik Fan Club, complete with a newsletter which folded after one issue. Linus even invited Joe to a testimonial dinner for Charlie Brown; the ballplayer got lost, though, on his way from Shlabotnik's day job at the car wash.

Shlabotnik was demoted to the minors after hitting .004 over an entire season; his one hit was a bloop single with his team comfortably ahead. His greatest achievements included making spectacular plays on routine fly balls and throwing out a runner who had fallen down between first and second.

After being sent down to the Green Grass League, Shlabotnik retired as a player and agreed to manage the Waffletown Syrups. Sadly, Joe was fired after only one game, after calling for a squeeze play . . . with no one on base.

On one Primer thread, a poster speculated Lou Piniella was ready to sign Shlabotnik; surprisingly, this turned out be untrue.


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Subject: RE: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 10:39 PM

Little Hawk is correct, but there's much more to the story.

Joe Shlobotnik's baseball career came to an untimely end due to a soda straw wrapper being carelessly blown onto the infield of Shea Stadium by seven-year-old Jason Bryant of the Bronx. An errant gust of wind blew the offending wrapper into Shlobotnik's left eye, doing irrepairable damage. Young Bryant's father was heard to remark, "Holy shit! You really can put someone's eye out with one of those things!"

After leaving baseball, Shlobotnik, who had been an avid amateur musician for years, put together a band known as "One-Eyed Joe and the Schmoes". The band stayed together for about ten years with Shlobotnik as frontman, charting a handful of minor hits. Joe was forced to leave the band in 1996 after trying unsuccessfully to pork the lead guitarist's wife, a minor movie star whose fame was based more upon her bra size than her acting abilities. The band continued touring after Shlobotnik's departure, changing their name to "Just the Schmoes With No Mo' Joe."

Upon his depature from the Schmoes, and after a brief stint in rehab, Shlobotnik purchased a defunct diner in Queens and sunk his entire life savings into refurbishing it. It has been moderately successful though Joe sometimes wishes he had never seen a cheeseburger. The soda straws at Shlobotnik's Diner do not come with tissue-paper wrappers.


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Subject: RE: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 10:45 PM

Oh! You mean Joe Shlabotnik with an "a", not Joe Shlobotnik with an "o"!

Well, yes, if you're talking about Joe Shlabotnik he had nothing to do with a rock band. He didn't even like music.


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Subject: RE: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 10:51 PM

The baseball player's name is Shlabotnik, with an "a".


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Subject: RE: BS: Joe Shlobotnik
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Jun 06 - 10:53 PM

I'm interested in both of them.


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Mudcat time: 28 August 5:42 AM EDT

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