The Darby Ram

[ C ]

Oh, I went off to Darby town.
It was on one market day,
And I saw the biggest ram's herd,
'Twas ever fed on hay.

Chorus:
Sing hi-ho, Darby, 
Oh Darby, Darby day,
And that was the biggest ram's herd
'Twas ever fed on hay.

Now, don't go near this ram, sir, 
While he feed the grass [sic]
For he'll snuff you up his nostrils
And blow you out his ass.

Now the horns that grew on this ram, sir,
Now, they were made of brass.
One grew out of his forehead
And the other grew out of his ass.

Took all the oxen in Darby town
To roll away his bones.
Took all the women in Darby town
To rolls away his stones.

Now the man that wrote this song, sir,
Is neither poor nor rich,
But the man that sang this song, sir,
Is a lyin' son of a bitch.

[ D ]

Hubert Canfield's correspondents sent two fragments of this in response to his advertised appeal in early 1926.  One hints that the quatrain ballad may have been veering in another direction:

There was a ram in Darby Town 
Who had two horns of brass.
And one stuck out of his forehead
And the other stuck out of his, 
	Out of his, out of his --

Chorus:
Maybe you don't believe me,
Maybe you think I lie.
But you can go to Darby Town 
And see the same as I.

There was a man in Darby Town
Whose whiskers were so thick
That it took the girls an hour and a half
To find the end of his,
	End of his, end of his --

Chorus:
Maybe, etc.