From cray@mizar.usc.edu Tue Sep 6 16:39:51 1994 Return-Path: zippy@usa.net Received: from cns.cscns.com (root@cns.cscns.com [192.156.196.1]) by mizar.usc.edu (8.6.8.1/8.6.4) with SMTP id JAA21525 for ; Tue, 6 Sep 1994 09:47:45 -0700 Received: from [192.156.196.103] (port3.cns-annex.usa.net) by cns.cscns.com (4.1/SMI-5.1) id AA21896; Tue, 6 Sep 94 10:41:28 MDT Message-Id: <9409061641.AA21896@cns.cscns.com> Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" Date: Tue, 6 Sep 1994 10:49:53 -0700 To: Sandra_Demi@transarc.com From: zippy@usa.net (Pikes Peak H4) Subject: Moose Song Cc: cray@mizar.usc.edu, 72772.2633@compuserve.com Status: RO X-Status: > As Songmeister Extraordinaire, I thought you might be interested > in this song I stumbled across. I don't have a tune for it, but > for some reason the cadence of it seems familiar (like some other > hash song or old beer drinking song). Have you seen this one > before? If you know of (or come up with) a tune for it, please > let me know! Yo Satan! Your version of the "Moose Song" had two verses that were new to me (the ones indicated with a ">" below). The melody is "Sweet Betsy From Pike", the same tune that "Lupe (Loopy) the Mexican Whore" and "Charlotte the Harlot" are sung to. Could you please tell me where you stumbled across your version? I'm in cahoots with a Professor from USC who's published a schlorly collection on the "roots" of bawdy songs. He likes to know as much about each song as possible, so your assistance in this regard would be appreciated. Thanks for the contribution. The latest and greatest version of the "Moose Song" follows: .c.236. MOOSE SONG .i.ANIMALS:Moose Song, ; Tune: Sweet Betsy From Pike When I was a young lad I played with the girls, I'd fondle their titties and twirl their curls, But my true love ran off with a classmate named Bruce, I never got treated that way by a moose. CHORUS: (sung while making antlers on head with hands) Moose, moose, I love a moose, I've never had anything quite like a moose, My life has been merry, My women been loose, But nothing compares to the love of a moose. When I'm in the mood for a very fine lay, I go to the closet and pull out some hay, I open the window and spread it around, Because moose will come running when hay's on the ground. Women like pearls and diamonds and cars, I spend all my money on them in the bars, But a moose is content to be tied to a tree, While I find other mooses to satisfy me. > Now I've made it with all kinds of beasties with hair, > I'd make it with snakes if their fangs were not there, > I've made it with walrus, two ducks and a goose, > But I've never had anything quite like a Moose. > > Now gorillas are fine for a Saturday night, > And lions and tigers, they puts up a fight, > But it just ain't the same when you slams your caboose > As the feeling you gets when you humps with a Moose. (Wimmin's Verse) All my past lovers did brag about size, Those tales of twelve inches were nothing but lies, But a moose is the size that a man ought to be, That's why from now on its only mooses for me. When I was much younger I read dirty books, I stroked myself with each gazing look, But nothing can make my eyes start to twinkle, Like the feeling I get jacking off to Bullwinkle. Now that I'm older and on into my years, I'll have you know I shed no tears, While I sit by the fire with a glass of Mateuse, Playing hide the salami with Marvin the moose. CF: Ed Cray, USC Flying Booger, Aloha H3 ON-ON! ZiPpY Pikes Peak H4 Colorado Springs, CO, USA From cray@mizar.usc.edu Tue Sep 6 16:42:52 1994 Return-Path: zippy@usa.net Received: from cns.cscns.com (root@cns.cscns.com [192.156.196.1]) by mizar.usc.edu (8.6.8.1/8.6.4) with SMTP id OAA06847 for ; Tue, 6 Sep 1994 14:06:11 -0700 Received: from by cns.cscns.com (4.1/SMI-5.1) id AB26227; Tue, 6 Sep 94 15:00:12 MDT Message-Id: <9409062100.AB26227@cns.cscns.com> Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" Date: Tue, 6 Sep 1994 15:08:30 -0700 To: cray@mizar.usc.edu From: zippy@usa.net (Pikes Peak H4) Subject: Moose Song Status: RO X-Status: Ed, Booger: As you can see a dead end. ZiPpY >Thanks for the additional verses and the tune (which, unfortunately, I >don't know, but perhaps I can find it). Personally, I prefer my >verses since they're *all* womens' verses... > >Here's the full text of the message in which I found the Moose Song. >This message was posted on netnews.rec.pets.cats and cross-posted to >many other newsgroups. I contacted Alec Habig to see if he had a tune >for it. His response was as follows: > >> "Alec Habig" writes: >> I don't know what the tune is, having never heard it sung (only >> typed). If you come up with a tune that works, let me know! Hmm... >> maybe the theme from Mr. Ed? Dunno. Music isn't exactly my strong >> suit :) >> >> PS - sorry for the off-topicness, but rumour is that the way to >> pacify alt.bigfoot people is to send them Moose poetry for some >> unknown reason. >> -- > >On On, >Satan > >---------- Forwarded message begins here ---------- >admin@wizard.net (The ArchWizard) writes: >> >> Let's give the moose the noose!!! >> >> The ArchWizard > >Hmm. I'll contribute more than a m00se haiku on Mr. A.Wizard's part. >Here's a whole song - author unknown, mildly lewd, but entertaining >nonetheless. Also entirely off-topic (nearly) everywhere, but what >the hey. > > Alec > >PS - could this be the secret alt.bigfoot anthem?? > > ----------------------------- THE M00SE SONG -------------------------------- > > When I was a young girl I used to like boys, > I fondled their thighs and played with their toys, > But me boyfriend ran off with a salesman named Bruce, > You'd never get treatment like that from a Moose! > > Chorus: > So it's Moose, Moose, I like a Moose, > I've never had anything quite like a Moose, > I've had many lovers, my life has been loose, > But I've never had anything quite like a Moose! > > Now when I'm in need of a very good lay, > I go to me closet and gets me some hay, > I opens me window and spreads it around, > 'Cause Moose always comes when there's hay on the ground! > > Chorus > > Now I've made it with all kinds of beasties with hair, > I'd make it with snakes if their fangs were not there, > I've made it with walrus, two ducks and a goose, > But I've never had anything quite like a Moose! > > Chorus > > Now gorillas are fine for a Saturday night, > And lions and tigers, they puts up a fight, > But it just ain't the same when you slams your caboose > As the feeling you gets when you humps with a Moose! > > Chorus > > (slowly) > Now that I'm old and advanced in me years, > I'll look back on me life, and I'll shed me no tears, > As I sit in me chair with me glass of Mateuse, > And play hide the salami with Marvin the Moose! > > Chorus > > >-- > Alec Habig, Indiana University High Energy Astrophysics > ahabig@bigbang.astro.indiana.edu > http://astrowww.astro.indiana.edu/personnel/ahabig/ > Ted Kennedy's car has killed more people than my guns. From cray@mizar.usc.edu Tue Sep 6 16:42:52 1994 Return-Path: zippy@usa.net Received: from cns.cscns.com (root@cns.cscns.com [192.156.196.1]) by mizar.usc.edu (8.6.8.1/8.6.4) with SMTP id OAA06847 for ; Tue, 6 Sep 1994 14:06:11 -0700 Received: from by cns.cscns.com (4.1/SMI-5.1) id AB26227; Tue, 6 Sep 94 15:00:12 MDT Message-Id: <9409062100.AB26227@cns.cscns.com> Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" Date: Tue, 6 Sep 1994 15:08:30 -0700 To: cray@mizar.usc.edu From: zippy@usa.net (Pikes Peak H4) Subject: Moose Song Status: RO X-Status: Ed, Booger: As you can see a dead end. ZiPpY >Thanks for the additional verses and the tune (which, unfortunately, I >don't know, but perhaps I can find it). Personally, I prefer my >verses since they're *all* womens' verses... > >Here's the full text of the message in which I found the Moose Song. >This message was posted on netnews.rec.pets.cats and cross-posted to >many other newsgroups. I contacted Alec Habig to see if he had a tune >for it. His response was as follows: > >> "Alec Habig" writes: >> I don't know what the tune is, having never heard it sung (only >> typed). If you come up with a tune that works, let me know! Hmm... >> maybe the theme from Mr. Ed? Dunno. Music isn't exactly my strong >> suit :) >> >> PS - sorry for the off-topicness, but rumour is that the way to >> pacify alt.bigfoot people is to send them Moose poetry for some >> unknown reason. >> -- > >On On, >Satan > >---------- Forwarded message begins here ---------- >admin@wizard.net (The ArchWizard) writes: >> >> Let's give the moose the noose!!! >> >> The ArchWizard > >Hmm. I'll contribute more than a m00se haiku on Mr. A.Wizard's part. >Here's a whole song - author unknown, mildly lewd, but entertaining >nonetheless. Also entirely off-topic (nearly) everywhere, but what >the hey. > > Alec > >PS - could this be the secret alt.bigfoot anthem?? > > ----------------------------- THE M00SE SONG -------------------------------- > > When I was a young girl I used to like boys, > I fondled their thighs and played with their toys, > But me boyfriend ran off with a salesman named Bruce, > You'd never get treatment like that from a Moose! > > Chorus: > So it's Moose, Moose, I like a Moose, > I've never had anything quite like a Moose, > I've had many lovers, my life has been loose, > But I've never had anything quite like a Moose! > > Now when I'm in need of a very good lay, > I go to me closet and gets me some hay, > I opens me window and spreads it around, > 'Cause Moose always comes when there's hay on the ground! > > Chorus > > Now I've made it with all kinds of beasties with hair, > I'd make it with snakes if their fangs were not there, > I've made it with walrus, two ducks and a goose, > But I've never had anything quite like a Moose! > > Chorus > > Now gorillas are fine for a Saturday night, > And lions and tigers, they puts up a fight, > But it just ain't the same when you slams your caboose > As the feeling you gets when you humps with a Moose! > > Chorus > > (slowly) > Now that I'm old and advanced in me years, > I'll look back on me life, and I'll shed me no tears, > As I sit in me chair with me glass of Mateuse, > And play hide the salami with Marvin the Moose! > > Chorus > > >-- > Alec Habig, Indiana University High Energy Astrophysics > ahabig@bigbang.astro.indiana.edu > http://astrowww.astro.indiana.edu/personnel/ahabig/ > Ted Kennedy's car has killed more people than my guns. From cray@mizar.usc.edu Fri Sep 9 08:07:49 1994 Return-Path: 72772.2633@compuserve.com Received: from arl-img-2.compuserve.com (arl-img-2.compuserve.com [198.4.7.2]) by mizar.usc.edu (8.6.8.1/8.6.4) with ESMTP id AAA28319 for ; Fri, 9 Sep 1994 00:17:41 -0700 Received: from localhost by arl-img-2.compuserve.com (8.6.4/5.940406sam) id AAA04651; Fri, 9 Sep 1994 00:48:36 -0400 Date: 09 Sep 94 00:44:43 EDT From: Paul Woodford <72772.2633@compuserve.com> To: Zippy Cc: Ed Cray , Satan Subject: Moose Message-ID: <940909044442_72772.2633_FHM75-1@CompuServe.COM> Status: RO X-Status: Dear Zippy, Satan, and Ed, Nothing new here, but since my version of the Moose Song is arranged a little differently, I thought I'd share it with you. Thank you, Satan, for the new verses. Thank you, Zippy, for finally naming that elusive tune. I'm about convinced that "Sweet Betsy" is the Universal Melody. Seems to go with just about anything, with the certain exception of those damn Frank Zappa songs. 42. MOOSE SONG Melody-Sweet Betsy from Pike Contributed by ZiPpy, Pikes Peak H4 Some verses by Flying Booger Some verses contributed by Satan, Pittsburg H3 Chorus (sung while making antlers on head with hands): Moose, moose, I love a moose, I've never had anything quite like a moose, My life has been merry, My women been loose, But nothing compares to the love of a moose. When I'm in the mood for a very fine lay, I go to the closet and pull out some hay, I open the window and spread it around, Because moose will come running when there's hay on the ground. Harriers' verses: When I was a young lad I played with the girls, I'd fondle their titties and twirl their curls, But my true love ran off with a classmate named Bruce, I never got treated that way by a moose. Women like pearls and diamonds and cars, I spend all my money on them in bars, But a moose is content to be tied to a tree, While I find other mooses to satisfy me. Now I've made it with all kinds of beasties with hair, I'd make it with snakes if their fangs were not there, I've made it with walrus, two ducks and a goose, But I've never had anything quite like a moose. Now gorillas are fine for a Saturday night, And lions and tigers, they puts up a fight, But it just ain't the same when you slams your caboose As the feeling you gets when you humps with a moose. Harriettes' verses: All my past lovers did brag about size, Those tales of twelve inches were nothing but lies, But a moose is the size that a man ought to be, That's why from now on it's mooses for me. When I was much younger I read dirty books, I stroked myself with each gazing look, But nothing can make my eyes start to twinkle, Then getting it off with that stud Bullwinkle. Now that I'm older and into my years, I'll have you know that I shed no tears, While I sit by the fire with a glass of Mateus, Playing hide the salami with Marvin the Moose. On On, Flying Booger Aloha H3, Hawaii From cray@mizar.usc.edu Sat Sep 17 09:09:28 1994 Return-Path: zippy@usa.net Received: from cns.cscns.com (root@cns.cscns.com [192.156.196.1]) by mizar.usc.edu (8.6.8.1/8.6.4) with SMTP id UAA17415 for ; Fri, 16 Sep 1994 20:43:15 -0700 Received: from [192.156.196.106] (port6.cns-annex.usa.net) by cns.cscns.com (4.1/SMI-5.1) id AA14856; Fri, 16 Sep 94 21:37:11 MDT Message-Id: <9409170337.AA14856@cns.cscns.com> Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" Date: Fri, 16 Sep 1994 21:45:44 -0700 To: cray@mizar.usc.edu From: zippy@usa.net (Pikes Peak H4) Subject: More Moose! Cc: 72772.2633@compuserve.com, Sandra_Demi@TRANSARC.COM, ZippyP2H4@aol.com Status: RO X-Status: Hey guys, thought the Moose thing was over, and what do I stumble upon, a searchable WWW page of folksongs! (If any of you have WWW access, let me know and I'll send you the address of the folksong page.) So more Moose, and Satan, you'll like this one, cuz it's hardcore, bra-burning, man-hating. Will send other stuff I cull from this source in the next few days. I LIKE A MOOSE (Wimmin's Version) By: Anne Bredon Tune: Villikins and His Dinah There's an infamous song goin' 'round 'bout a moose It's really quite funny and quite full of juice, But all of it's told from a masculine view, And a lot of us women want to get a piece too. CHORUS: Moose, moose, I want a moose I've never had anything quite like a moose. I've had lots of others, my life has been loose But I've never had anything quite like a moose. I figured it all out one day by myself. When my man went off and left me on the shelf, He'd found him a new love, a nubile moose-ess Which gave me a bad case of rampant distress. "What's sauce for the gander is sauce for the goose." Said I as I set out to find me a moose; But I ran into problems that men do not mind, For male moose are seasonal creatures, you'll find. I hunted in winter, I hunted in spring, I hunted all summer and found not a thing; But I found my moose when leaves started to fall And...oh brother! did I have a ball. With my arms 'round his barrel, my feet by his tail I hanged and we banged and we really did flail, Bouncing and jouncing I came with a roar I never had had such a great lay before. But autumn soon passed and so I said goodbye I'll be here next year when the leaves start to fly; Yes I will return when the leaves start to fall And we'll ball and we'll ball and we'll ball and we'll ball. And so, my dear sisters, I have to confess Being balled by a moose, it is really the best But you'll make out with others for most of the year For male moose are seasonal creatures, I fear. A bear in the winter is furry and warm And if you don't tickle, he'll do you no harm. I spring try an eagle, his feathers are light That is if you are not afraid of great height. In summer, I fear, you must make do with men. But, not to worry, soon fall comes again. Then you can return to your own faithful moose And revel in supremely scrumptious screws. ********************************************************************* * On-On! * "I value kindness to human beings first of all, * * ZiPpY * and kindness to animals. I don't respect the * * Pikes Peak H4 * law; I have a total irreverence for anything * * Colorado * connected with society except that which makes * * Springs, CO * the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food * * USA * cheaper." Brendan Behan * ********************************************************************* From cray@mizar.usc.edu Sat Sep 17 15:07:00 1994 Return-Path: zippy@usa.net Received: from cns.cscns.com (root@cns.cscns.com [192.156.196.1]) by mizar.usc.edu (8.6.8.1/8.6.4) with SMTP id JAA27887 for ; Sat, 17 Sep 1994 09:45:50 -0700 Received: from [192.156.196.116] (port16.cns-annex.usa.net) by cns.cscns.com (4.1/SMI-5.1) id AA04108; Sat, 17 Sep 94 10:39:45 MDT Message-Id: <9409171639.AA04108@cns.cscns.com> Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" Date: Sat, 17 Sep 1994 10:48:19 -0700 To: Ed Cray From: zippy@usa.net (Pikes Peak H4) Subject: Re: More Moose! Status: RO X-Status: > 1) Do send the address to the WWW folksong stash. Ed, it's: http://web2.xerox.com/digitrad Used the keyword "bawdy" and got 79 hits. Also, another WWW resource I found was the Rugby Song page which led me to the Folk Song page. the Rugby Song page's descriptive info is: http://rugby.phys.uidaho.edu/rugby/Songs/songs.html > 2) Now, let me get it straight: on this list you found another version of > the Moose song credited to Anne Bredon? Do we know her? My question is > directed to determining if this song is actually passed around in oral > tradition, that is, whether the song has a known author, or whether folks > feel they can change the version they have learned as the mood overcomes > them. (That is, in my mind, one of the two determinants of "folk song." > The other is whether it lasts over time, from one generation to the next > -- though "generation" is not the demographer's 33 years, but a variable > span often as short as, say, four years for a high school generation.) I don't know. She's credited, but who she is I dunno. Maybe if you fish about in the Folksong Page, you'll be able to get closer to the answers of your questions. Have fun (Earl Warren won't mind if you ignore him for a few minutes). ********************************************************************* * On-On! * "I value kindness to human beings first of all, * * ZiPpY, GM * and kindness to animals. I don't respect the * * Pikes Peak H4 * law; I have a total irreverence for anything * * Colorado * connected with society except that which makes * * Springs, CO * the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food * * USA * cheaper." Brendan Behan * ********************************************************************* From cray@mizar.usc.edu Mon Sep 19 18:46:30 1994 Return-Path: demi+@transarc.com Received: from po2.transarc.com (po2.transarc.com [192.54.226.2]) by mizar.usc.edu (8.6.8.1/8.6.4) with SMTP id IAA13114 for ; Mon, 19 Sep 1994 08:54:19 -0700 Received: by po2.transarc.com (5.54/3.15) id for cray@mizar.usc.edu; Mon, 19 Sep 94 11:52:33 EDT Received: via switchmail; Mon, 19 Sep 1994 11:52:32 -0400 (EDT) Received: from boswell via qmail ID ; Mon, 19 Sep 1994 11:51:41 -0400 (EDT) Received: from boswell via qmail ID ; Mon, 19 Sep 1994 11:51:21 -0400 (EDT) Received: from BatMail.robin.v2.12.CUILIB.3.45.SNAP.NOT.LINKED.boswell.sun4.40 via MS.5.6.boswell.sun4_40; Mon, 19 Sep 1994 11:51:21 -0400 (EDT) Message-Id: Date: Mon, 19 Sep 1994 11:51:21 -0400 (EDT) From: Sandra_Demi@transarc.com To: cray@mizar.usc.edu, zippy@usa.net (Pikes Peak H4) Subject: Re: More Moose! Cc: 72772.2633@compuserve.com, ZippyP2H4@aol.com In-Reply-To: <9409170337.AA14856@cns.cscns.com> References: <9409170337.AA14856@cns.cscns.com> Status: O X-Status: Thanks for the additional verses. I, however, prefer the verses I sent to you; I think all of them can be used as women's verses, and I think they are more creative and funnier than the ones Anne Bredon wrote. Several of the verses Zippy sent me are good, too, but his chorus is male-oriented. BTW, I did find the music to "Sweet Betsy >From Pike"; is the tune (or tunes?) Anne B. lists the same? Sandy (aka Satan)