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Entertainment is changing dramatically and these songs
are rapidly disappearing despite being racist, homophobic,
sexist and just about every other taboo in the boofc.
If we erase our oral history we have no checi on our own
history. Personally, I thini sexual politics and sexual antics
can be hilariously f unny.

The companion CD 'Sing Us Anothery, Dirty As Buggery' also available on Rouseabout.

Major Bumsore

9 330970"001020"

www.undercovermusic.com.au
rouseabout@undercovermusic.com.au

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rooted in the country

As a music historian I make absolutely no excuses for the songs in this disgusting collection. They are
part of a very long tradition of bawdy song, some dating back hundreds of years. Like most music they
have come in and out of fashion however, despite aggressive political correctness, often to the point of
being ridiculous, these songs refuse to completely disappear. I feel as if I am doing my part in having
them stick around a little longer.

Bawdy song scholars have suggested that Australia is one of the last bastions of the genre. I tend to
agree and would suggest the songs vigorously entered the tradition here at a time when we were a dif-
ferent country, a country born of a massively disproportionate male to female ratio. The 19th century
saw these songs sung, and the poems recited, in shearing sheds, teamster and droving camps, outback
pubs and then passed to the factory workers and sporting clubs of the early twentieth century. Their
important role in male bonding during wartime also played a significant role in their survival. Television,
that vile enemy of homemade entertainment, killed off most community singing however 'filthy songs'
are resilient little buggers and they still manage to survive and I am never surprised to hear politicians,
judges, stockbrokers and even a few women, enthusiastically singing 'their' version of such songs.

All of the songs and recitations in this collection, and the accompanying book, were collected in Aus-
tralia. Like all traditional songs, part of their survival mechanism is the circulation through what we refer
to as the 'oral tradition' - songs learnt though repeated singing at sporting clubs, on coach trips and
drunken sessions at the local rubbity-dub. The fact that many of the songs possess loose rhythms and
the verses often more doggerel than artful lyric is no coincidence. Simplicity and singability are part of
their success story. That said, the songs are of a noble tradition and what appears simplistic is often far
more subtle and, of course, often hilarious.

Parody is one of the most popular vehicles for bawdy song. A well-known song is changed to suit the
story. These songs are not plagiarism other than the fact they have been 'claimed' by the 'folk' and their
originator, understandably, usually anonymous.

I do believe it is important to document the bawdy song tradition because it is a threatened expression.
Entertainment is changing dramatically and these songs are rapidly disappearing despite being racist,

homophobic, sexist and just about every other taboo in the book. If we erase our oral history we have
no check on our own history.

Personally, I think sexual politics and sexual antics can be hilariously funny.

Finally, my chicken-hearted musical friends refused point-blank to have their real names associated with
this project. They didn't mind the songs, in fact they relished in singing and playing them, but thought
going public was going a stretch too far. You can probably work out who they are and, if you're really
stuck you can always email me at wfahey@bigpond.net.au and I will let the cat out of the bag. On
second thought, maybe I should also protect my reputation and be listed under a pseudonym - Major
Bumsore.

Warren Fahey - Australian Folklore Unit. PO Box 262, Potts Point, NSW 2011.
Email contributions to warren@warrenfahey.com

Production notes and credits

This project grew out of a comprehensive study and survey of Australian bawdy song, verse, graffiti and
children's rhymes complied in 2007/8/9 and is to be published as soon as Warren Fahey finds a publisher
game enough to tackle such a project. Alternatively it might be published as an e-book associated with
his Australian Folklore Unit website (www.warrenfahey.com).

The recordings were made in 2009 at Bloody Dog Studios with the enthusiasm of Marcus Holden,
George Washingmachine, Clare O'Meara, Mark Oats and Garry Steel. The former had absolutely noth-
ing to do with the musical arrangements, singing or playing of the music.

Mastering was done by Andy Busuttil of Blue Mountain Sound. Andy, a sensitive soul, would prefer not
to have his name or his studio mentioned in the notes.

The cover artwork is by James P Gilmour (www.jamespgilmour.com). James couldn't give a stuff.

The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band.

Major Bum sore

The Major saw action in WW2 where he was officer in charge of latrines and
ablutions. A strict disciplinarian, he had a well-earned reputation as a man on a
mission. He learnt many of his songs in seedy bars, shower blocks, and quarter-
master's stores and on route marches.

Andre Rude

Born of immigrant parents, probably from the Netherlands, Andre learnt the violin at
an early age. Although his favourite composer is Strauss he also claims to be fond of
heavy metal and some operatic arias. He also plays mandolin, guitar and gin rummy.

Die if ton g horn

Despite his name Dick is quite short and does not play horns. He is a
fine fiddler and has been known to break out in song and rashes.

Shiela Blige

As recognisable from her name Shiela claims Aussie/Celtic ancestry. A gifted fiddler
she has been advised to keep her hands to herself and her music to the world.

Oliver Guinness

Oliver has a drinking problem but, when sober, can play several instruments
including mandolin, violin, Vera Lynne and a glass of gin.

Rodney McMinge

Highly talented at the keyboard and cheeseboard this keyboard player has made
quite a name for himself in bawdy song circles.

He proudly wears the McMinge tartan of shaggy crossed black and red pubic hairs *
interwoven with the McMinge family motto: 'One In All In' _M Jjr

1 Maggie's On The Shit-Chute - Major Bumsore & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - Australian Folk-
lore Society Journal, No. 24,1994. From Tony Davis, collected by Ron Edwards, 1973.1 suspect only an Australian
could create a word like 'shit-chute'. It has two meanings: one being an arsehole and the other, in this case, refers
to the old dunnies and army latrines where the bottomless pan was over a pit. A matelot is a sailor.

2 The Lobster In The Pot - Andre Rude & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - Ron Edwards had
this one from Tony Davis as in AFSJ October, 1993. The quoted version, with its reference to 'phone' and 'shuffti'
places it firmly in the twentieth century. Ed Cray in The Erotic Muse says this song 'Is one of those living artefacts
of another era, passed down in oral tradition for more than 300 years'. He also gave it the distinction of being the
first song in his book. Originally known as The Sea Crab', it has been collected in Australia under various titles but
especially The Lobster' or the 'Codfish Song. It has numerous melodies associated with it including part of 'The
Limerick Rake'. A cleaner version, with its rol-tiddly-ole chorus, was popular in the music halls. Some versions use
the 'Farmer In The Dell' as melody. This version collected by Karina Berry Redpath as remembered from the singing
of her father, Bill Berry.

The Penultimate offers an unusual chorus as follows; Singing ro tiddly ho, shit or bust / Never let your bollocks
dangle in the dust I Never let your bouncing balls dangle in the dust / Never let your curly twirlies dangle in the dust
I Never let your grinders dangle in the dust / Never let your knicker-knockers dangle in the dust / Never let your flip-
per floppers dangle in the dust / Never let your clicker-clackers dangle in the dust I Never let your hammer-hangers
dangle in the dust / Never let your gristle-grabbers dangle in the dust (Repeat all lines of chorus)

3 Thrashing Machine - Major Bumsore & The Larrikins - From a broadside printed by Williamson Printer, New-
castle, England, and held in the Mitchell Library. I changed the location to Goulburn. The Penultimate Songbook
offers a similar song, as 'The Farmer's Daughter', more modern as the engine is driven by steam rather than faithful
old 'Dobbin'.

4 The Boy Stood On The Burning Deck - Major Bumsore - Composite. British poet Felicia Dorothea Hemans
wrote the original 'Casablanca', published in 1826, and it has been a parody favourite ever since. The star in the
chorus is usually rendered with a painfully long 'staaaarrrrr'. I'm not sure how the tune ended up married to the
verse. My father regularly recited: The boy stood on the burning deck / Picking his nose like fury / He rolled it into
little balls / And flicked it at the jury.

5 My Beautiful Muff ■ Shiela Blige & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - Folk Songs of Australia, J.
Meredith/Hugh Anderson. This song has an old pedigree and was sung to a waltz tune. Meredith commented that
"My Beautiful Muff' was always a favourite with the drinkers in the back parlour of the Centennial (Gulgong hotel).
On winter's nights, Tom Gibbons would sit there in front of the log fire, and sooner or later a request would be made
for him to 'give lip to it'. Everybody joined in the chorus, "My own and I'll wear it..."

In researching the song I found a reference in James Hepburn's A Book of Scattered Leaves (Poetry of Poverty in
Broadside Ballads in 19th Century England. Vol. 2. 2000), where he suggests the song was probably composed by
the broadside publisher, John Morgan, whose name appears on some of the original broadside (although this could
also imply he was the publisher). Morgan was the composer of several lightly sexual ballads including 'New Rigs At
The Races' and 'Blow the Candle In'.

6 My Grandfather's Cock Was Too Big For His Pants - Major Bumsore & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers
Band - Snatches & Lays. Parody of Henry Clay Work's 'Grandfather's Clock' (published in USA 1876).

7 Footprints On The Dashboard Upside-Down - Andre Rude & Oliver Guinness with The Celebrated Knockers
& Knackers Band - This^one got around in the 1950s but was published originally in Immortalia in 1927. It is es-
sentially a sung conversation between a farmer and a salesman. I first learnt this in the 1960s. There is a version in
Best Bawdry which takes a different perspective.

8 Whollop It Home - Major Bumsore & The Larrikins - From George Patrick Fahey who used to sing this in the
shower. I delighted in joining in on the chorus. I recorded Dad singing it for my Australian Folklore Unit oral history
collection at the National Library of Australia. He always managed to slur number eight and it wasn't until I was older
that I realized he was singing 'Put your finger up my date'

I have recently found out that the song dates back to the sea shanty 'Put yer shoulder next to mine and pump
away'. Sea song historian Stan Hugill admitted to "much blue-penciling" in many published versions.. The original
title was "Put Your Belly Next to Mine and Drive it On" or "Sheet it Home." Hugill's skill as a tamer of naughty songs
was such that his sentimental text seemingly found its way into rugby lore close to forty years ago.

9 Never Root With A Prostitute - Dick Longhorn & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - As published in
Fester Magazine and an obvious parody of 'Never Smile At a Crocodile'.

10 Bung Your Eye - Major Bumsore & The Larrikins - A salty tale from the early streets of Sydney with a twist on
the old stories whereby the sailor returns to a port to find he has fathered a child.

11 South Of The Tramstop - Andre Rude & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - Various sources includ-
ing this text from Ken Macmaster, Melbourne, collected by PeterParkhill, c.1975. The suburb of Rushcutters Bay

is down the hill from Sydney's Kings Cross. Chrome was an early 20th century term for prostitute. Stony means
possessing no money, as in stony broke. And yes, the tram did run from Kings Cross, past Rushcutters Bay, to
Watsons Bay.

12 What's The Gentlest Tissue? - Major Bumsore & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - Many advertis-
ing jingles attract parodies, especially bawdy parodies. This one, based on one of the most successful campaigns
refuses to go away.

13 There Once Was An Indian Maid - Major Bumsore & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band -I have
collected various bawdy versions of this song reinforcing its popularity as a dance melody in Australia. The original
'Redwings' was a popular song and fiddle tune. The song was written by American songwriter Thurland Chatterway.
It became a popular square dance tune and is still heard at bush dances. I am providing three collected versions to
show evidence of how the song has travelled.

14 Holman's Bar - Major Bumsore - From Ebb Wren, collected by Rob Willis and John Meredith, Forbes, NSW.
NLA. Brad Tate also collected a version with an incomplete ending from Mac Mitchell, Speers Point, NSW 1972,
and published in his Bastard From the Bush. I first came across the poem as Halman's Bar in 1973 when George
Tuckett of Nathalia, Victoria, sent me several verses commencing: He was boasting of his tallies in Jimmy Halman's
Bar / A pale and puny little cunt, as big guns mostly are.

15 The Black Cat Piddled In The White Cat's Eye - The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - There has
been some discussion on the Mudcat Cafe website regarding the possible origin of this dance tune's name. Musi-
cians liked to give tunes names - mostly as a phonetic reminder of the tune's beat.

16 The Bastard From The Bush - Major Bumsore - This is a parody of Henry Lawson's 'Captain of the Push'.
I have collected the poem and fragments several times including Mick Edwards, Melbourne, 2003, and John
Horwood, Croydon, Victoria. The Push refers to early 2oth. century Sydney street gangs., mostly based in The
Rocks. They were larrikins, loud and sometimes dangerous to themselves and others. Lawson's original poem took
the mickey out of them. It has been suggested that Lawson also wrote the parody, which is also a masterpiece
and surely the crown in the Australian bawdry treasure-trove. H. A. Lindsay, in an article in the literary magazine
Quadrant (v. 5.1957) suggested that Lawson actually wrote the bawdy version first and, needing money, cleaned it
up as 'The Captain of the Push'. Laycock offers a slightly different version in Best Bawdry. It appears the song was
also known in New Zealand and appeared in The Songs We Sang: a collection of New Zealand Army and Service
Ballads' by Les Cleveland, 1959.

17 Here's Your Youngest Child! - Major Bumsore - First version from Bushwhacker's Band 'practise tape', circa
late 1950s, supplied by Rob Willis. Second version Australian Folklore Unit file circa 1975. The Bushwhackers sang
their version but the melody was indistinguishable. Bubby refers to breasts however the second version use is con-
fused. One assumes the word is bubs and the origin of the more familiar term boobs.

18 The Old Gray Mare -Shiela Blige & Major Bumsore with The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - Queen-
sland University Hockey Club Songbook, circa 1960s.

19 The Hole In The Elephant's Bottom - Major Bumsore & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - A music
hall song from my grandmother, Polly Phillips, who knew quite a few bawdy ditties.

20 Bullocky Bill - Major Bumsore and Andre Rude with The Celebrated Knockers and Knackers Band - From Mick
Playford, Bathurst, 1987. A parody of one of the world's most popular comedy series, The Beverley Hillbillies.

21 Maids Of Australia - Major Bumsore & The Larrikins - From the singing of Jim Cargill, Randwick, NSW, 1973.
Original recording can be heard at NLA. I had been taping Jimmy's sea song repertoire when I asked him if he
knew any 'naughty songs'. He was living in a boarding house and he got up, closed the windows and drew the
blinds. I thought this was going to be really filthy but to my surprise it turned out to be a classic erotic folk song. It is
interesting in as much as it is possibly the first song to mention a sexual encounter between a settler and indigenous
woman.

22 A Is For Arse Holes - Major Bumsore & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band - Paddy Dick, Wyoming,
NSW.AIphabetical and alphanumerical songs are a major part of the bawdy song tradition. Maybe it is because
half-drunken singers can establish where the hell the song goes next if it is easier to follow. Whatever the case this
is one of the most popular.

23 Shickered - Major Bumsore & The Larrikins - Published in Mess Hall Songs & Rhymes of the RAAF. Shickered
is a Yiddish word meaning drunk. The song is a relative of an extremely old ballad 'Our Goodman' and is also known
as 'Seven Nights Drunk'.

24 The Kings Cross Harlot's Ball - Andre Rude & The Celebrated Knockers & Knackers Band -1 live in the
Sydney suburb of Potts Point, which includes Kings Cross. It's the historic red-light district however those lights have
dimmed considerably over the years. The locals talk about 'Kings Cross Tennis" - when you walk down Darlinghurst
Road you will hear the score - "Twenty, love." "Sixty, love", "Fifty, love". Some versions of this song call for a drawn
out refrain of 'without her pants on' after each verse.

T he companion allium,

'Sing Us Anothery, Dirty As Buggery'

is available from Rouseabout Records

ROUSEABOUT
RECORDS

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