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Drunken Limerick Singing (Audience Participation)
that skinny old fag iggy pop
was fucking an old football sock
the
grit and the smell
really made his flange swell
amp ripped the velns
out of his cock
in a country that's called abyssinia
the whole population has tinea
with really sore feet
and not much to eat
the poor cunts get skinnier
and skinnier
chorus
i yi yi yi, don't ever fly on a concorde,
you'll fly higher and
higher
with your arsehole on fire,
and wish that you'd never hoped
on board..
his highness prince charles of great britain
stuck his thumb up the
arse of a kitten
he remarked that a cat
made him crack a good fat
but he stopped cause one day he was bitten
a really poor mexican peon
got a job working for claude neon
the
bright fluoro glare
fucked up his hair awd
he looked like that singer
named dion
chorus
i yi yi yi cocksuckers never eat hair pie.
an agent named mario maiola
was licking his wife's areola
she said
stop that now
and start tonguing my brown
and then get me a bottle of
cola
a miner from near andamooka
was fellated by a girl named sue cooper
but he pulled his huge knob
straight out of her gob
and then shot a
wad up her pooper
a girl who liked drinking vanilla
had thighs like a bloody great
pillow
she had nothing to do
so she went to the zoo
and stole fruit
off the fucking gorilla
chorus
i yi yi yi, wild ducks have juicy cloacals,
sing us another one,
just like the other one,
there's duck shit all over my tackle
chubby checker stayed home and went twisting
while his mates for
vletnam were enlisting
but on count down, he met molly
who said chubb
by golly
your fat knuckles feel great when they're fust-
ing
there was a woman named daisy
who was always just too fucking lazy
til. a bloke down from cairns
rubbed her sexual glands
and her arse
started pumping like crazy
chorus
i yi yi yi john howard has fucking big eye brows
a kiwi who loved rooting younglambs
he'd grab them while drinking
round farmdams
the way he would pick'em
was to bend down and lick'em
then get rid of the the taste with some timtams
aw old bloke from parkes, a stargazer
shaved the hair of his balls
with a razor
he said when i swim
i'll be thinking of quim
and
dreaming of rooting dawn frazer
chorus
i yi yi yi, spain is a nice fucking place,
you won't be a pauper
on the island of majorca,
just like that
cunt christopher skase.
a west australian pemberton maw
embarked on a beastial plan
he
planted his tackle
in a poor ducks cloacal
and pounded its anus to
sand
a copraphagic who lived out in brunswick,
was eating some shit off a
toothpick,
he said i'll relax on this bench,
while i savour the stench,
but ya may have to give me the heimlich
a bloke who came from hanover,
jerked off with a slice of pavlova,
he said it slips and it slides,
like vaginal insides,
while i dream of
anna kornikova.
rodney's fart break
i've heard that mariah carey
has a pubis unusually hairy
i'll bet
k.d. lang
would love to give her a bang
with a dildo that looks really
scary
there was a young doctor a locum
who liked to roll joints and then
smokem
but what he really preferred
was to suck cocks and stir turd
with a poofta whose hymen was broken
chorus
i yi yi yi, don't every fly on a concorde,
you'll fly higher and
higher
with your arsehole on fire,
and wish that you'd never
hopped on board
a bloke who was visiting dooen
couldn't stand the sound of cows mooen
last nights was a bastard,
cause all night it lasted
if it happens
again i'll be spewin'.
there once was a cowboy named clinton
who came up around winton
he
said fuck this hat
the bastard is crap
the brim is too small and i'm
squintin
a young bloke named mark from nandambo
was out fucking a camel named
sambo
and when mark shot his load
on the side of the road
the beast
started dancing a mambo
chorus
i yi yi yi cocksuckers never eat hair pie
sing us another one,
just like the other one
waltz me around again willy
a customs official named gary dean
was giving his bosses wife's arse a
ream
but the force when he shot
made her arse bleed a lot
then they
both ended up in quarantine
a bloke from whangamata
drove past some sheep in his car
he said,
it hardens my meat
when i hear the things bleet
and i often shoot whew
they go baa
in gladstone there once was a bloke
who always loved having a toke
but a weekend in sydney
blew his bowel through his kidney
from
drinking a full carton of coke
a zookeeper from the bahamas
hap a thing for tongue kissing lamas
but the way that they spit
he got covered in shit
and he had to go
fuck the iguanas
a yugoslavian bloke named zeb kostrel
met a woman one night in a
hostel
his tiny pin dick
always made women sick
so he rooted his
cat in the nostril
aw old jerbel fucker named reggie
smeared the rodents arse with some
vegi
it's heart started to race
and the look on its face
the poor
little wretch looked real edgy
chorus
i yi yi yi, don't every fly on a concorde,
you'll fly higher and
higher
with your arsehole on fire,
abd wish that you'd never
hopped on board
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