The Gelding Of The Devil
This text is found in all the major broadside
ballad collections, its popularity no doubt due
to its Chaucerian humour. Tune - sources
include Pills to Purge Melancholy
A pretty jest I will you tell
Of the Gelding of the Devil of Hell.
There was a Baker of Mansfield town
To Nottingham Market he was bound,
And riding under the willows clear
The baker sang with a merry cheer.
The Baker's horse was lusty and sound
Well worth in judgement full fine pound.
His skin was smooth and his flesh was fat
His master was well pleased at that
Which made him sing so merrily
As he was passing on the way.
But as he rode over the hill
There met he the Devil of Hell.
"O Baker, Baker," thee cried he,
"How comes thy horse so fat to be?"
These be the words the Baker did say
"Because his stones be cut away.
"Thou shalt geld me before thou dost go"
Then quoth the devil, "If it be so.
just tye thy a horse to yonder tree
And with thy knife come and geld me."
The Baker had a knife for the nonce
Wherewith he cut out the Devils's stones.
The Baker as it came to pass
In haste alighted from his horse
And the Devil on his back he lay
While the Baker cut his stones away.
Which put the Devil to great pain
And made him to cry out amain.
"Ah!" quoth the Devil "Beshrew thy heart
Thou dost not feel how I do smart,
And for the deed which thou hast done
I will be revenged again.
And underneath this greenwood tree
Next Market day I will geld thee,"
The Baker then but little said
But at his heart was sore afraid
He durst no longer then there to stay
But he rode home another way,
And coming to his wife did tell
How he had gelded the Devil of Hell
Moreover to his wife he told
A tale that made her heart full cold
How that the Devil (he) did say
That he would geld him next Market day.
"Ah!" quoth the good wife "Without a doubt
I had rather both thy eyes were out."
"For then all the people both far and near
That knows thee mill both mock and jeer
And good wives they will chide and bawl
And stoneless gelding will thee call.
Then hold content and be thou wise
I will some pritty trick devise."
"I'll make the devil change his note
Give me thy hat thy band and coat
Thy hose and doublet eke also
And I like to a man will go
And I'll warrant thee next Market day
To fright the Devil quite away."
When the Baker's wife she was so drest
With all her bread upon her brest
To Nottingham Market that brave town,
To sell her bread both white and brown
And riding merrily over the hill
Oh there she spied two devils of hell.
A little devil and another
As they were playing both together.
"Oh! oh!" quoth the Devil then right fain
"Here comes the Baker riding amain.
Now be thou well or be thou woe,
I will geld thee before thou dost go."
The Baker's wife to the Devil did say,
"Sir, I was gelded yesterday."
"Ah!" quoth the Devil, "I mean to see."
And pulling her coats above her knee
And so looking upwards from the ground
Oh there he espyed a terrible wound.
"Oh!" quoth the devil, "Now I see
He was not cunning that gelded thee
For when he had cut out thy stones
He should have closed up thy wounds
But if thou stay some little space
I'll fetch some salve to cure the place."
She had not rid but a little way
But up her belly crept a flea,
The little devil seeing that
He up with his paw and gave a pat.
Which made the good wife for to start
And with that she let go a rousing fart.
"Oh! oh!" quoth the devil, "Thy life is not long
Thy breath it smells so horrible strong.
Therefore go thy may and make thy Will
Thy wounds are past all human skill.
Begone, Begone, make no delay
For here thou shalt no longer stay."
The good wife of this news man glad
So she left the devil almost mad.
And when she to her husband came
With joyful heart she told the same.
How she had cozened the Devil of Hell
Which pleased her husband wonderous well.
