A LIMERICK FOR A WOMAN TO SAY

There was a young man from St. Paul
Whose cock was exceedingly small.
     Now it might do for a keyhole
     Or a little girl's peehole
But for a big girl like me - not at all!  

   A LIMERICK FOR A WOMAN TO SAY

I *do* love a lay every day,
So whenever you're coming this way
   Just phone in advance
   And I'll jerk off my pants,
And we're set for a sexy soiree! 

   A LIMERICK FOR A WOMAN TO SAY

I'm terribly sorry I kissed Ed --
His Mind is, I fear, a bit twisted.
   I like, 'quelque peu'
   Masturbating 'a deux',
But it hurts me to find he's tightfisted.

                               1967  

   A LIMERICK FOR A WOMAN TO SAY

Well, I only charge ninety-nine cents,
And get fucked by no end of hot gents.
   It lures passels of peckers --
   They're mostly wet deckers --
And the payoff, per night, is immense!

                                 1965  

   A LIMERICK FOR A WOMAN TO SAY

We were took by our teacher, Miss Beeham,
To see statues in't British Museum.
   We girls were in fits
   'Cos the interstin' bits
Of the boys were broke off -- you should see 'em! 

   A LIMERICK FOR A WOMAN TO SAY

Of a husband I do not ask much,
Just an all mod. and con. little hutch;
   Bank account in my name,
   With a checkbook for same,
Plus a small fee for fucking and such.

                                1973    

   A LIMERICK FOR A WOMAN TO SAY

Of my clients, I like best the go-getter,
Who is rich and disdains a French letter.
   Some men think a lot of me
   Who profess to like bottomy,
But for *me* frontal twatomy's better.

                             1973