Untitled Songbook #2 (1970s)

Below is the raw OCR of an untitled 1970s songbook. If you would like to verify the text below, please download the PDF of the scanned pages.

TABLE OF ODNTENTS
A BABBLING BROOK 5$
A BOMBER THAT FLIES TEN THOUSAND MLES............._. . .56
ACE IN THE HOLE . ... 47
ADELINE SCHMIDT_________________ ............. 2
AIN'T IT A BLOODY SHAME____________________________........ 49
AIR FORCE 801 _____ 15
A MAN WITHOUT A WOkAN™'" " _, _ _ 87
A NAVY PRAYER_____________________________..""' . ..""37
AND I LEARNED ABOUT FLYING FROM HIM _ 20
ARIGATE FOR THE MEI ORIES______________.'_______ 89
ASS HOLES ARE CHEAP TOD-\Y ~ _________'Z1' 81
AURALEE_______________"_Z_ ""*__""_____' ____1 _ "90
BALL OF YARN______________" _ _ 68
BANG IT INTO LULU_____________I_______________.. . 103
BARNACLE BILL THE PILOT____ _ 16
BATTLE HYMN_____________'.......... ' 90
BESIDE A KOREAN WATERFALL "'" __„*___. n
BEER SONG __________ " """ _1 '120a
BLACKBIRDS "_____________ "" _____________________51
BYE BYE CHERRY _ 44a
BLESS THEM ALL ~ "" ""...........*" ......... 31
BLOOD ON YOUR TUNIC_____ ......_._.__________29
-BOOZIN' BUDDIES _ _'" ____ ____ 25
BUDDY ~SS£*®¥8_______________________85
BYE BYE BLACKBIRD"' TJi "- -_'_-___-T_______'-"-- 92
CALL OUT THE ARMY "AND THE" NAVY__________________________40
CATS ON THE ROOB TOP____________________________________46
CHICKEN SONG ____________________________________19
CHITOSE BLUES________________________________________31
CIG1RETTES AND WHISKEY__ 31a
CLOVIS . _ ____,..... . , ......... r 120
COCAINE SUE___________________________________ 86
COLD WINTERS EVENING ----- 7
COME ON AND JOIN EHE ATRTOkCE _ 17 __?
COOL--------------------------------------------------------------------------------105
CO*PILOTS LAMENT_________________________________________25
CREEPING AND CRAWLING ___________" 10910$
DIRTY LIL____________ZZZ 51
DOODLE*LEE*DOO__________ ____'"_H" '"" ~ ".........." '" &
DO YOU KEN MY SISTER TILLY ——. . - ,. ^
DO YOUR BALLS HANG LOW_____________________________100
DRINKING RUM AND COCA COLA______ ______________ " 1H
DRUNK______________~~ ~~ 94
EARLY ABORT '. ..... ..... 50
EIGHT BUCKS X_)A_""_7 __*ZT'""'"" ..... ...... '59
FALSIES IN BRASSEIRES '......."....... '----------------; 74
FAREWELL TO ANTUNG UNIVERSITY _ _________ 30
FATHERS GRAVE _________________ ~ 12
FIGHTER PILOTS"_______________ _______ "54
FIGHTER'PILOTS" ______~~___" """" g^
FLAK IN THE NIGHT , . "52
FLAK SHOWERS________________ ._____________________________14
FOGGY FOGGY DEW ________ "99
FORESKIN FUGITIVES .________________ '79
FRIGGIN IN THE RIGGIN 75
..... ^

GLORiUS 94
GOj.NG HOME 52
GOOD OLD MOUNTAIN DEW 29
11G" SUITS AND PARACHUTES 58
HAIL YOU FIGHTER PILOTS 59
HARitlfiAN 94
HAVE YOU TRIED YESSUP 7
HEriE'S TO 110
HE BOUGHT A RANCH IN TEXAS HE DID 110a
HERE'S Tu THE REGULAR AIR FORCE 23
HINKY DI i97
HONEY %m 0°
HORSE SHIT ?8
HUKORESQUE 109
HUTCH'S BALLAD 33
I AIN'E GOT WO USE FOR THE WOhEN 106
ICE ON THE RICE 79
IF YOU FLY 61
I LOVE A BILLBOARD 109
I LOVE MY GIRL 5
I LOVE OLD WING OPS AND FLYING SAFETY 85
IN FLIGHT REFUELING 8^
IN THE SPRINGTIME 103
IN THE TALL GRASS 91
INTO THE AIR 58
INTO THE AIR 69ERS 97
I SAW HER SNATCH 108
ITAZUKE ORT 16
IT'S TiiAGIC 97
I USED TO WORK IN CHICAGO 97
IVAN SKAVIMSKI SKAVAR 5
I'VE GOT SIX PENCE 60
I WANTED WINGS 27
I WANTED WINGS (KOREAN VERSION) 28
I WANT TO GO HOME 59
JOIN THE AIR FORCE 101
KATHUSELEM 52
KEYHULE IN TIE DOOR 95
KIMPO BLUES fKfcPO-eONm e
KOREA 12
KOTEX SONG 10
KUNI*RI AND ANTUNG 32
LAST NIGHT 96
LEADER OF THE GROUP 96a
LEE'S HOOCHIE 86
LET OLE MOTHER NATURE HAVE HER WAY 119
LET'S HAVE A PARTY 112
LETS HAVE A PARTY 112a
LILLY FROM PICCADILLY 74
LITTLE RED LIGHT 99
LOOK AT THE EARS ON HIM 53
LYDIA PINKHAM 75
MACH RIDERS IN THE SKY 66
MIRY ANN BURNS 1
2

CONTENTS CO NT
MAKE MB OPERATIONS o^a
MEET ME IN KYOTO 16fe*
MIG &£ 15 44
MINNIE THE DERMIS 93
MOONSHINE 22
MOM'S IN BED H3
MUTHERS HUMPERS BALL 93
MOVIN ON 63
MUSTANG'S RUM BY MERLIN S3
MY DARLIN 39 63
MY GOD HOW THE MONEY ROLLS IN 64
THE WILD EYED CADET 59
NAPALM 19
NAUGHT LITTLE DOG 117
NAVY PRAYER H2a
NELLY DARLING 4
NO BALLS AT ALL 6
ODE TO THE B*29 60
ODE TO THE JOC DUTY OFFICER 79
OFF WE GO 18
OH, ITS 3EER BEER BEER 73
OH MY GOD- 83
OH RIP ThE FEATHERS AWAY 2
OH THE £35th 13 A VERY FINE SQUADRON 79
OH THEY SAY THAT THIS KIMPO'S A WONDERFUL PLACE 7
OLD BEER BOTTLES 45
OLD GREEN RIVER 76
OLD GREY BUSTLE 66
OLD NUMBER NINE 104
OLD SOLDIERS NEVER DIE 43
ONCE THEY WERE HAPPY 57
ON TOP OF OLD FUJI 44
ON TOP OF OLD PYONGYANG 44
O'RIELLEYS DAUGHTER 3
OH THE MISERY OF LIVING IN SIN 79a
NATIONAL EMBALMING U 59a
PADDY MURPHY HO
PARTIES H
PARTIES BANQUETS AND BALLS 6
PASDE CALAIS 60
PILOTS WOE 60a
PILOTS HEAVEN 102
PILOTS IAMENT 15
PIPER LAURIE 47
PISS ON THE 73
PLLASE DON'T BURN THE SHIT HOUSE DOWN 6
POOR BUT HONEST 46
POOR LITTLE ANGELINE ¥ 41
PUSAN U 36
RAIL CUTTERS 63
RED NOSE MIGS 44
3

CONTENTS CONT
RED SCARFS 87
RING DANG DOO 65
BIO RIO RIO 83
ROLL YOUR LEG OVER 77
ROTATIONAL EVE 116
SAFE HAND JAIL 22
SALLY 4
SALOME 82
SAM HOUSTON 105
SAMMY SMALL 1
SAVE A FIGHTER PILOTS ASS 34
SEUUL CITY SUE 53
SEPBSQA 92
SHanty town 112
Show me THE WAY TO GO HOME 85
SIDI SLIMANE SGNG 113
SILVER THREADS AMONT THE GOLD 7
SING US ANOTHER ONE DO 69
SIX POUNDS OF BOOBIES 8
SIXTEEN TIMES 96
SONG OF R AND R 9a
SONG OF THE 18th 61
SONG OF THE ZULU WARRIORS 26
Sv;UTH OF THE BORDER 116
SPANISH GUITAR 91
SQUADRON SONG 28
STAND TO YOUR GLASSES 26
STAY WITH GOD 3
STRAFERS 42
STRAFIN' ROUND THE MOUNTAIN 37
STREET CLEANER SONG 113
STYLES 2
TACHIKAWA, YOKOHAMA, ITAZUKE 55
TAEGU GIRLS 40
TATOOED L&DY 39
TELL ME WHY 90
TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS 107
THE AIR FORCE IA MENT 13
THE B-36 78
THE BALLS OF O'LEARY 79
THE BASTARD KING OF ENGLAND 80
THE BLuODY GREAT wheel 4
THE CAMEL 45
THE CANDEL SONG 83
THE CHEETAS &B
THE COED AND THE CADET 87
THE- CO* MIES LAMENT 104
THE CUCKOO SONG 33
THE FAIRCHILD ABORTION 51
THE FIGHTIN 68th 62
THE FORMATION 59
THE HAIRY CHESTED EKHT SIX 110
«* JSWck bull , fila
The AF Has gone to Hell 4 112a

THE LITTLE GREY RAT__________________________________________-18
THE MAID OF THE MOUNTAIN** *»**____________________________J&r -
THE MAN BEHIND THE ARMOR PLATED DESK_____________________{$-A
THE MISSION ______________,__________________________ j&
THE MOST CHIVILROUS PISH_______________________________Sll
THE PERSIAN KITTY_________________________________________—39
THE ?0 RIVER VALLEY ___________________________;___________30
THE PRETTIEST SHIP__________________________________________^
THE PRETTIEST GIRL I EVER SAW_____________________________Jfe
THE SCOTCH BEDDING____________________________________________*g
THE RIVER RAN RED_____________________________________ kZ
THE THING__________ ~^ 67
THE TINKER_____________________________________________________10
THE WOODPECKER________________________________________________76
THOSE WEDDING BELLS ARE 3REAKING UP________________________67
THREE WHORES FROM CANADA JUNCTION_________________________.81
TIE MY ROOT AROUND A TREE___________________________________.108
TIPTANXS AND TAILPIPES (THE WALL)__________________________12
TITANIC_________________________________________________________18
TOAST TC THE BLUE ANGELS_____________________________________55
TCO LONG AT ITAZUKS ____________________________________61
TO THE REGULARS____________'___________________________________24
TO THE T-3LES DOWN AT SID1! ___________________________115
WO LADIES WERE CONFIDING __________________________93
UNCLE JOHN AND AUNTIE MABLE_________________________________10
VIOLATE ME _________________________76
VIRGIN STURGEON ________________________________100
WE SOLD OUR COW _______________________________120
WE HEARD YOU WHEN YOU SANG____________________________120-A
WEST VIRGINIA HILLS___________________________________73
WHEN YOUR LEAVES HAVE TURNED TO SILVER________________Ik
WHIFFENPOOF SONG _______________________________95
WRECK OF OLD f97______________________________________21
YOU CiiN TELL A FIGHTER PILOT__________________________11
FIGHTERS PILOTS TOAST

^ere's to me in my sober mood
when I ramble sit and think
Here*s to me in my drunken mood
when I gamble, sin and drink
But when at last it's over
and from this world I pass
I hope they bury me upside down
so the whole world can kiss my ass
5

SAMMY SMALL
Oh my name is Sammy Small fuck em all
Oh my name is Sammy Small fuck em all
Oh my name is Sarmny Small and ITve only got one ball
But it fs bett.er than none at all - fuck em all*
They say ITve killed a man fuck em all
they say Ifve killed a man fuck em all
I hit him in the head with a fucking piece of lead
now the silly fuckers dead - fuck em all
They say I!ve got to swing fuck em all
they say Ifve got to swing fuck email
They say ITve got to swing from a fucking piece of string
What a siily fucking thing - fuck em all
The parson he will come fuck em ail
the parson he will come fuck email
The parson he will come with his tales of kingdom come
he can shove em up his bung - fuck em all
The sherrif will be there too fuck em all
the sherrif will be there too fuck em all
The sherrif will be there too with his silly fucking crew
they have fuck all els e to do - fuck em all
I saw molly in the crowd fuck em all
i saw molly in the crowd fuck em all
I saw molly in the crowd and i felt so fucking provrd
that I shouted right out loud - Fuck Bm All
MARY ANN BURNS
Mary ann Burns was the queen of all the acrobats
She could do the tricks that would give a cat the £1 its
Roll green peas from her fundamental orifice
Do a double flip and catch them on her tits
A great big son-of-a-bitch twice as big asme
Hair around her ass like the tranches on a tree
She can swim fish fight fuck
roll a barrel driue a truck
Mary Ann Burns is the girl for me*

ADELINE SCHMIDT
There was a young maiden named Adeline Schmidt
She went to the doctor cause she couldnft shit
He gave her some nladicine wraoped up in glass
Up went the wix dow and out went her ass*
Chorus:
It waT brown, brown shit falling down
Brown brown shit all around
it was brown brovn shit iailing down
My God how that poor girl could shit
A handsome young copper was walking his beat
He happeried to be on that side of the street
He looked up so bashful he Hied up so shy
When a piece .f brown shit hit him right in the eye#
Chorus
This handsome young copper he cussed and he swore
He called that young maiden a dirty old whore
And on Brooklyn bridge you can still see him sit
With a sit<;n round his neck saying, "Blinded by shit11
Chorus
Styles (Tune Smiles)
There are styles that show the ankle
There are styles that show the knee
There are styles that have the boys all wondering
Just what the girls are gonna let us see
There are styles that have a tender neaning
That the eyes of xe n alone can see
But the style that Eve wore in the garden
Is the style that appeals to me.
OH RIP THE FEATHERS AWAY
Oh rip the feathers away away
Oh rip the f .athers away
Oh the ass of a duck
makes a Wonderful fuck
If you rip the feathers asray
2

O'REILLEY'S DAUGHTER
As I was sitting at OfReilleys bar
Listening to tales of blood and slaughter
Came a thought into my mind
Why no shag OfReilleys daughter
Chorus
Fiddley-I*E Fiddley*l*0
Fiddley*I*E for the one ball Reilly
Rubby dub dub jig balls and all
Ruddy dub dub shag on
I grabbed that she bitch by the hair
Then I threw my left leg over
Shagged and shagged and shagged some more
Shagged and shagged til the fun was over
Chorus
There came a knock upon my door
Who could it be but her God-Dam father
Two horse pistols by his side
Looking for the man who shagged his daughter
Chorus
I grabbed that bastard by the ha ir
shoved his head in a p il of water
Shoved those pistils up his ass
A damm sight farther than I shagged his daughter
Chorus
Now as I go walking down the street
People shout from evexy corner
There goes the dirty sd n of a bitch
The one who shagged O'Reilleys daughter
Stay with OD (Dashing thru the sno)
The game was played on Sunday in Heavens own back yard
With Jesus playing quarterback and Moses playing guard
The angels in tte bS achers my god how they did yell
When Jesus na de a touchdown against Lhe boys from hell
Ghorus (Tune Oh, them golden slippers)
Stay with god, oh lordy, stay with god, oh lordy
Jesus on the one yard line, moses doin very fine
Stay with god , oh lordy, stay with god, oh lordy
Hoke em, soke em, Jesus poke em, stay with god
3

NELLY DARLING (Tune Nelly Darling)
Oh your ass is like a stovepipe Nelly darling
And the nipples on your tits are turning green
There's an odor of blue ointment round your pussy
You are the ugliest bitch that I have ev r seen
There fs a yard of lip protruding from your navel
and when you piss you piss a stream as green as gr^ss
There's enough wax in your ears to make a candle
So kindly make one dear and shove it up your ass
SALLY
Sally's in the alleysifting cinders
Lifted up her leg and farted like a man
Wind from her bloomers broke six winders
Cheeks of her ass went BAM BAM BAM
THE BLOODY GREAT WHEEL
An airman told ne before he died
5\nd I donTt think that the bastard lied
^hat he had a wife with a cunt so wide
that she could re ver be satisfied
So he invented a prick of steel
Driven by a bloody great wheel
Two jrass balls all filled with cream
And the who fucking issue was driven by steam
Round and round went the bloody great wheel
in and out went the prick of steel
until at last the maiden cried
Enough Enough, I'm satisfied
But nov we come to the bitter bit
There was no was- of stopping it
She was g?it from her ass to her tit
and the who&e fuckirg issue was covered w±, h shit
A Babbling Br ok
A babbling brook, a shady nook, a girl all drissed in yellow
Two snow white tits, two ruby lips, oh you lucky fellow
Between the hours of two and four when he began to linger
She said, Young ian if you are through I'll finish with my finger
So he got up and took a piss, and she got up and farted
He wipedhis jock upon her sock, and that is how they p rted
Nine days went by, he heaved a sigh a sigh of pain and sorrow
the pimples p&nk were on his dink but therfll be li.ore tomorrow
Nine months went by and she heaved a sigh a sigh of oain & sorrow
two little mutts were in her guts but they'll be out tomorrow
4

IVAN SKAVINSKI SKAVAR
Oh the harems of egypt are fair to behold
and the maidens the fairest of fair
The fairest a greek, was owned by a shiek
One abdul abbulbal amer
A traveling brothei was brought into town
By a Russian who came from £far
And a challenge weit wide, as Co who could outride
Count Ivan Skavinski Skavar
Now abdul rode by with his hand on his fly
And his alls h anging low with desire
And he wa ered a million that he could outride
Count Ivan Skavinski Skavar
So this spectacle great was all set for a date
Twas to be referreed by tte C«ar
And the streets were all linea to see harlots entwined
With Abdul and Ivan Skavar
xhey ib t at the track with their tools te nging slack
And the starters gun punctured the air
They were quick on the rise, people gasped at the si^e
of Ivan Siavinski Skavar
The cunts were all shorn and no rubbers were worn
niid abdul revved up like a car
But he hadftTt a hope against the long greasy stroke
Of Ivan Skavinski Skavar
Now when Ivan had won and was cJe aning hisg# n
He bent down to pick up his pair
When something red hot, up his rear track was shot
And Abdul the bastard was there

^hen the harlots all screamed and the people yelled queen
hey were ordered ap^rt by the C^ar
But so fpst were they stuck, it was fucking bad luck
For Abdul and Ivan Skavar
The cream of the joke was when at last they were broke
It was laughed at for year by the Czar
F r Abdul the fool, had left half of his tlool
In Ivan Skavinski Skavar
I love my girl
I love my girl yes I do deed I do
I love her truly
I love the hole that she pisses through
I love her tits tiddly tits tiddly tits
And her nut brown ass hole
I!d eat her shit gobble gobble slurp slurp
with a wooden s poon
5

KO BALLS AT ALL
There once was a girl named Sara Mc^ox
With hair on her chest and cheese in her "box
She married a man named Patrick McCall
With a very short peter and no balls at all
Chorus:
No halls at all
No halls at all
A bery short peter and no halls at all
Ther first night that they were wed
They took of their clothes and went straight to hed
She reached for fiis pecker,, it was very small
She reached for his balls, he had no balls at all
Now maother dear maother oh what shall I do?
I've married a man who never can screw
I reached for his pecker,, it was very small
I reached for his balls, he had no balls at all
Oh daughter dear daughter don't be sad
It was the same trouble I had with your dad
There's many a man who will come to the call
Of the wife of a man who has no balls at all
The dauther went home, took her mothers advice
And found the results most exceedingly nice
A bouncing young baby was born in the fall
To the wife of the man who had no balls at all
PARTIES BANQUETS AND BALLS
( Tune- Take me out to the ballgame )
Parties banquets and balls boys
Parties banquets and balls
As president Truman has said before
There's only one way to stay out of a war
That's with parties banquets and balls boys
Parties banquets and balls
We'll have parties and banquets and
Banquets and parties
And Balls, Balls, Balls
PLEASE DON'T BURN THE SHITHOUSE DOWN
Please don't burn the shithouse down
Mother has promised to pay
Mother is drunk,, father's in jail
Sister's in a family way
Brother dear is mighty queer
Times are fucking hard
So please don't burn the shithouse down
Or we111 all have to shit in the yard
6

COLD WINTER'S EVENING
'Twas a cold winter's evening, the quests were all leaving
O'Leary was losing the bar, When he turned and he said to the lady in redf
Get out.1 You con't stay where you are
She shed a sad tear in her bucket of beer, As she thought of the cold night
ahead.
Then a gentleman dapper stepped out of the crapper,
-And these are the words that he said:
Her mother never told her the things a young girl should know
About the ways of fly, fly boys and how they come and go*
She's lost her youth and beauty, and life has left its sad scar
So remember your mothers and sisters boys and let her sleep under the bar
SILVER THREADS AMONG THE GOLD
Darling let me fix your garter
Just an inch above your fcnee
And if I should wander farther
Please don't blame it all on me,
The hdir around you puss's turning silver
The hair around my cock is turning gold
So let's put our two things together
Silver threads among the gold
So she let me fix her garter
Just an inch above her knee
And my hand did wander farther
And she pissed all over me
OH THEY SAY THAT THIS KIMPO'S A WONDERFUL PLACE
Oh they say that this Kimpo's a wonderful place
But the organizations a fucking disgrace
There's Captains and Major's and light Colonels too
With their hands in their pockets and fuck all to do
They stand on the ramp and they rave and they shout
They shout about things they know fuck all about
And for all of their good they might just as well be
A shoveling shit on the Isle of Capri
HAVE YOU TRIED YESSUP?
Have jdu tried Yessup
The best breakfast in the land
Have you tried Yessup
The best breakfast food in the land
Delicious, nutricious, the whole day throught
Jack Hard-On never tires of it, and neither will you
Ch have you tried Yessup,
The best breakfast food in the land
Yessup-Spelled backwards is Pussy
Spelled tideways is Slur-Slurp
7

SIX P0T3SDS £F BOOBIES
(Tune, These are the things I
Love)
Six pdunds of boobies in a loose brassier
An old used condrum is a glass of beer
A twot that twitches like a mooses ear
these are the things I love
A dirty Whore strolling down the street
A bloody Kotex in the rumbleseat
I love my poontang but I beat my meat
These are the things I love
KIMFO BLUES
(Tune, A little bit of heaven fell}
Oh a little bit of shit fell down
Out of the sky one day
And it landed in the Chosen
Oh so very far away
And when the Senate saw it
It looked s fucking bare
They said that!s what we're looking for
We'll send our Air Force there
So they sent their !86fs
Air Base Group and midics too
And they sent the dreaded 336th
They knew just what to do
And now you'll find the languished
In a place that's so remote
That all you'll hear those bastards shout,so
Where are these fucking boats
Chorus
I've got those Kimpo Blues
Kimchi Blues
I'M fed up
And I'm fucked up
And I'm blue
We tried to please Old Sygman
But it really was a farce
The only thing twas left to do
Was shove it up his arse
(Chorus)
Oh we^fouhd oiir Alma Mater
In ahouse in Yong Dong Po
The brass got there before us
They showed us where to go
8

MAKE MS OFEBATIONS
Don't give me a P-381 *^e props they conter-rotate
They've scattered and smitten from Burma to Britain
Don't give me a P-38
Chorus:
Just give operations
Way out on some lonely atoll
For I am too young to die
I just want to grow old
Don't give me a P-39
The engine is mounted behind
They'll tumble and spin and auger you in
Don't give me a P-39
Don't give me a peter four oh, a hell of an airplane I know
A ground loopin bastard, you're sure to get plastered
Don't give me a peter four oh
Don't gibe me a P-51, it was alright for fighting the hun
But with cooland tank dry, you'll run out of sky
Don't give me a P-51
Don't give me a P-6l, for night flying is no fun
They say it's a lark, but I'm scared of the darft
Don't give me a P-6l
Don't give me an F-8^, She's just a ground living whore
She'll whine moan and wheeze and she'll cldbber the reees
Don't give me and F-84
Don't give me an old thunderbolt, it gave many a pilot a jolt
It looks like a jug and it flies like a tug
Don't give me an old-thunderbolt
Don't give me a jet shooting star, it'll go, but not very far
It'll rumble and spaut, but soon will flame out
Don't give me a jet shooting star
Don't give me an F-86, with wings like broken match sticks
They'll aoom and they'll hover, but as for top cover
Don't give me an P-86
Don't give me an F-89, Tho TIME says they'll really climb
They're all in the states, all boxed up in crates
Don't give me an P-89
Don't give me an F-9^f it's never established a score
It may fly in weather, but won't hold together
Don't give me an F-9^
Don't give me an 86-D, with rockets radar and A/B
She's fast I donft care, she blows up in mid-air
Don't give me an 86-D
9

THE 6C0TCH WEDDING
Prelude: There was a ball a bloody great ball, the ball of Kerr:
Four and twenty prostitutes shaggin on the moor
Oh the King was in his counting house, counting out his wealth
The Queen was in the bed room, playing with herself
Chorus: Singing Ifll do ye this time, I'll dee it noo
The mon that did it last night, could na do it noo
Oh the bride was in the bedroom, explaining to the groom
The vag'na not the roctum, is the entrance to the womb
Oh the parsons wife she was there, seated down in front
A wreath of roses round her neck, a carrot up her cunt
Oh the village parson he was there, and very surprised to see
Four and twenty maidenheady hanging from a tree
Oh the parsons daughter she was there, she had them all in fits
Diving off the mantlepiece, and landing on her tits.
They were fucking in the haylofts, fucking in the ricks
You could na hear the music for the slushing of the pricks
They were fucking in the barley, fucking in the oats
Some were fucking sheep and some were fucking goats
Oh the village blacksmits, he was there, his hammer and his awls
Talking to the queen and showing off his balls
They were fucking in the parlors, fucking on the stairs
You could na see the carpets for the come and curly hairs
The village idiot he was there, a making like a fool
Pulling his foreskin over his head and whistling through his tool
Plowman Jock he was there, the bugger would na dance
Sitting with a hard on, and a waiting for his chance
The firey Colonel he was there, he'd fit amongst the Boers
He jumped upon the table and shouted for the whores
The village cripple he was there, he couldna do* ver much
So he laid them on the carpet, and he fucked them with his crutch
The chimneysweep and he was there, we had to put hl?n oot
For every time he farted, he filled the room with soot
The village postman he was there, he had a dose of pox
He couldna fuck his lassie so he fucked the letter box
And when the ball was over, and the folks went home to rest
They said they enjoyed the music, but the fucking was the best
38

MAES ME OPERATIONS (Condft)
Don!t give me a C-45, so slow it stalls out in a dive
A ground loop built in it, and bird colonels in it
Don't give me a C-45
Don't give me a C-54, six inches of rugs on the floor
And We'll go fat-cat'nf from here to Manhattan
Don't give me a C-54
Don't give me a B-45, -the pilots don't get back alive
The Mig 15'e chase em, they soon will erase em
Bon' t give me a B-45
Don 't give me a one-double-O, The bastard is ready to blow
The A/B is there, but you're saying a prayer
Don't give me a one-double-0
Don't give me an F-102, it never goes up when it's blue
An all weather toff in, that flames out so often
Don't give me an F-102
THE MAN BEHIND THE ASMOR PLATED DESK
(Tune- Strip Polka)
Early in the morning when the engines start to roar
You can see the old goat standiDg, beside his office door
He'll be sweating out the takeoff, as he's often done before
The man behind the armor plated door
Four times he's led us up there, and he always led up back
For he circled o'er the I.P., as we went in to attack
He said I'm hard yet fair boys, but allergic to ack ack
The man behind the armor plated desk
And when the targets sighted, who imspires the attack
Who says hundreds may go in lads, but a few aren't coming back
Who says We'll disregard the minimum, when you supress the flak
The man behind the armor plated desk
And when the mission's over, and briefing they should be
You can search the whole field over, but not a pilot will you see
For they'll all be at the 0 Club, with a mixed drink in their hand
Singing the Man Behind the Armor Plated Desk
SONQ OF R AND R
(Tune- Moonlight on the Wabash)
When the ice is on the rice in old Ohitose
And the Saki is the cellar starts to freeze
I don't want to see my wife in San Francisco
I just want to see my little Nipponese
9-a

KCTEX SONS
(Tune, Caissons go Rolling Along)
Youn can tell by the smell that she isn't feeling will,
When the end of the month rolls around
How she turns, how she squirms, how she gets a case of worms,
When the end of the month rolls around,
For it's hi, hi, hee, in the Kotex industry,
Call out your sixes loud and strong
Super J Junior.1-----Band-aid
For where are you go
The blood will always flow,
When the end of the month rolls around,
Keep fem bleedin1 when the end of the month rolls around.
THE TINKER
The lady of the mansion, was dressing for a bell when she expied a
tinker, pissing up against the wall.
CHORUS:
With his great big kidney wiper and balls as big as three and a yard and a
half of foreskin hanging down below his knee.
Bie lady wrote a letter and in it she did say,
Ifd rather be fucked by the tinker than my husband any day.
Oh the tinker got the letter and when it he did read,
His b^lls slung o'er his shoulder and his penis by his side.
Oh, he rode up to the mansion he rode up to the hall
Gor1 Blyme? said t'ne butler he has come to fuck us all
Ohr he fucked them in the parlor he fucked them on the beds,
Lord save us? Cried the chambermaids, We've lost our maidenheads
Oh, he fucked the Duchess standing he fucked her against the wall,
But when he fucked the butler twas the dirtiest trick of all.
Oh, he rode out form the mansion he rode into the street
With little drops of semen pattering at his feet
Oh, the tinkers dead and buried I'll bet he's gone to hell
He said he'd fuck the devil and I'll bet he's done it well
UNCLE JOHN & AUNTIE MABEL (Tune- Hark the Herald
Angels Sing)
Uncle John & Auntie Mabel, fainted at the breakfast table,
This should be suffienient warning, never do it in the morning
Ovalteen has set them right, now they do it every night,
Uncle John is hoping soon, to do it in the afternoon. A-—men
10

PARTIES
Ohf parties make the world go round
Parties make the world go round
Parties make the world go round
Sof letfs have a party
We're never to busy to say hello
We're never to busy to say hello
We're never to busy to say hello
HELLO - HELLO - HELIO
BESIDE A KOREAN WATERFALL
Beside a Korean waterfall, one bright and sunny day
Beside his shatter Sabrejet, a young pursuiter lay
His parachute hung from a nearby tree, he was not yet quite dead
So listen to the very last words this young pursuiter said
I'm going to a better land where everything is bright
Where whiskey flows from Telephone poles
Play poker every night
We havn't got a thing to do but sit around and sing
And all our crews are women, oh death where is thy sting
Oh death where is thy sting, ting-a-ling
Oh death where is thy sting
The bells of Hell will ring, ting-a-ling
For you but not for me
Ch, ting-a-ling-a-ling, blow it out your ass
Ting-a-ling-a-ling ling, blow it out your ass
Ting-a-ling-a-ling ling, blow it out your ass
Better days are coming bye and bye
TOU CAH TELL A FIGHTER PILOT
(Tuhe- Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory )
By the ring around his eyeball
You can tell a bombardier
You can toll a bomber pilot
by the spread around his rear
You can tell a navigator
By his sextants, maps, and such
You can tell a fighter jockey
BUT YOU CAN'T TELL HIM MUCH
11

FATHERS GRAVE
(Tune- Piccadilly Underground)
Oh they're digging up fathers grave to build a sewer
And they're going at the job at no expense
They're disturbing his remains, to make way for outhouse drains
To satisfy some brand new resident, Gor Blimey
Now father in his day was never a quitter
And I don't suppose he'll be a quitter now
He'll dress up in white sheets, and haunt those outhouse seats
And no one there will sit but he allowes, Gor Blimey
Mow won't there be some bloody constipation
And won't those bloody bastards rant and rave
Which is more than they deserve, for having the bloody nerve
To bugger about with a British workmans grave
TIPTANKS AND TAILPIPES ( THE WALL )
(Tune- Bless them all)
Bless thsm all, bless them all
Bless tiptanks and tailpipes and all
Bless old man Lockheed for building this jet
But I know a guy who is cussing him yet
Cause he tried to go over the wall
With tiptanks and tailpipes and all
The needles did cross, -and the wings did come off
With tiptanks and tailpipes and all
Through the wall, through the wall
Through the bloody invisible wall
That transsonic journey is nothing but rough
As bad as a ride on the local base bus
So I'm staying away from the wall
Subsonic for me and that's all
If you're hot you might make it
But you'll probably break it
Your butt or your neck, not the wall
KOREA
(Tune- I'm Looking Over a Four Leaf Clover)
I'm looking over a well fought over
Korea that I abhor
One for the tooney
And two for the show
Ridgeway said stay
But we want to gof
There's no use explaining
Why we're remaining
We got what we were fighting for
KOREA, KOREA, and diarhea
To make the rice grow some more
12

TH3 AIR FORCiS LAMENT
(Tune- The Battle Hym cf the Republic)
Mine eyes h^tve seen the days of men who ruled the fighting sky
With hearts that laughtd at death, who lived for nothing "but to fly
But now those hearts are grounded, and those days are long gone by
The Air Farce !s gone to hell
Chorus:
Glory flying regulations, have then read at every station
Crucify the man that breaks then, the ^lr Forces gone to hdll
My bones hwe felt their pounding throb, a hundred thousand strong
A ningty airborne legion set to right the deadly wrong
But now it!s only memory, it only lives in song
The Air ForCe!8 gone to hell
I have seen them in their T-bolts, when their eyes were dancing flame
I've seen their screaming power dives, that blasted Goering's name
But now they fly like sissies and they hang their heads in shane
Their spirit's shot to hell
Once they flew B-26's through a living hell of flak
And bloody dying pilots, gabe their lives to bring them back
But now they all play ping pong in^tho operations shack
Their technique's gone to hell
The lordly flying fortress and the liberator too
Once vrote the doom of Germany, vith contrails in the blue
3nt now the skies are empty, and our planes are wet with dew
And we can't fly for hell
Tou have heard your pounding 50!s blaze from wings of polished steel
The purring of your Merlin was a song 7 our heart could feel
But now the L-5 charms you with its moanin groanin squeal
And it won't climb for hell
I*ve you ever climbed a lightening up to there the air is thin
Have yon stuck her long nose downward, just to hear the screaming din
Have yon tried to do it lately, better not you'll auger in
And then you'll sure to catch hell
I hr.ve seen them in their Sabre's, when their eyes were dancing flame
I have seen their screaming po^er dives that blasted Stalin's name
But now they fly like sissies and they hang their heads in shame
Their spirit's shot to hell
Hap Arnold built a fighting team that sang a fighting song
About the wild blue yonder in the days when men vere strong
But now verre closely supervised for fear we may do wrong
The Air Force*8 gone to hell
We were cocky bold and happy when we played the angel's game
He split the blue vith bussing, and ve rolled our way to fame
But now that's all verboten and wefre all so goddamn tame
Our spirit fs shot to hell (C0ndft)
13

THE AIR iORCS IAMSNT (CCBD'T)
Sne dny I buzzed an airfield with another reckless chap
We flow a hot formation with his win^tip in my lap
Bnt there !s a new directive and we'll h°ve no more of that
TJr you will burn in hell
Mine eyes get dim with tears when I recall the days of old
Vhcn pilots took their choice of being old or young and bold
Alas I have no choice and I will live to be quite old
The Air Force's gone to hell
But smile awhile my pilots tho your eyes may still be wet
Someday we!ll be in heaven where the rules have not been set
And God will show us how to buzz and roll and really let-
The Air Force fly like hell
Chorus: #2
Glory no more regulations, rip them down at every station
Ground the guy that tries to make one, and let us fly like hell
WH3JT YOUR L&AraS HaYj) TURILiD TO SIL1SR
(Tune- Silver threads ainong the gold)
When your leaves have turned to silver
vill you loveus just the same
6hf we'll always call you________________
Isn't it a bloody shame
To the days at Itazuke
And the parties that we knew
'-hen your leaves have turned to silver
You can stick them up your flue
FLAX SHCTr:®S
(Tune- April Sho1 ers)
Although Fl?k showers, may come your way
They'll bring the panic, that makes you say
My fuel is Josephine, I!m ^oing heme
So if you want to stay and fight, you may
Stay and fight alone
ITve added throttle, I'm on r-.y way
I'll live to come back some other day
So keep on strafing that position
And Knock it out ftr me
I'm just a close supporter, can!t you see
Ik

AIR FORCE 801
(Tuns- Wabash Cannonbrill)
listen to the rumble, and hear old Merlin roar
I'm flying over Moji, like I never flew before
H-.or the mighty rush of the slipstream, and hear old Merlin moan
1*11 «i% 4 bt% tud' say a prayer, and hope it gets me home
Itazuke to^er, this is Air Force 801
I'm turning on the downwind leg, my prop has overrun
My coolant's overheated, the gauge says 1-2-1
You'd bettor get the crash crew, and get them on the run
Air Force 8il this is Itazuke tower
I cannot call the crash cr9w, this is their coffee hour
Tnutre not cleared in the pattern, now that is plain to 89e
So take it on around again, we have some VIP18
Itazuke tower, this is Air Force 801
ITm turning on the final, and running on one lung
I'm gonna land this Mustang, no matter what you say
I!ve gotta get my charts fixed up, before that judgement day
Itazuke towerf this is Air Force 8C1
I'm turning en the downwind leg, I see you biscuit gun
My engine's runnin ragged, and the coolant's gonna blow
I'm gonna orang a Mustang, so lock out down below
Air Force 301, this is jud^emant day
You're in pilots heaven, and you are here to stay
You just bought a Mustang, and you bought it v*ll
The famous Air Force 801 was sent straight down to hell
PILtTS LAM3HT
(Tuna- If I Had the '*ings Cf an Angel)
Now listen all you pilots and you airmen
«e will tell you a story sad but true
Of many who near wings but are not happy
Gather round while we sing this song to you
The many who * ear wings but are not happy
**ear a smile on their lips, not in their hearts
They're overjoyed to wear the badge of an airman
But are sad in getting off to such bad starts
A reason there must be for discontentment
Why thn gloom as dark as any blacked out loop
Just ask them one and all and they will tell you
ITro not a member of the 312th Fighter Groip
15

PILOTS WOE
From the runways down at Youngs town
To Geneva on the lake
To the dear old Airway Innf we love so well
You will hear the folks all say
No matter where you go
It's the 86th that always leads the way
We're poor JET PILOTS
Without any pay
AHHHHHHHHHH #$»♦$#
We1 re all been grounded because itfs too hot
Wefre doomed to set here till eternity
Oh Lord just give me a Mrd thats got A/B
AIR FORCE HYMN
From the Biltmore in Los Angeles
To the motels in Berdoo
If the Navy asks a lady
She will say to hell with you
If the Arny or the Navy
Ever gaze on heavens shores
They will find the Angels shacking up
With the U.S. AIR FORCE• ♦.......
TO WOMAN
Herefs to woman, the human vine
Buds each month, and "blooms in nine
The only thing this side of hell
That can empjry the nut without cracking the shell
Here's to that moment of sweet repose
When it1s belly to belly and toes to toes
And after that moment of sweet delight
Itfs ass to ass for the rest of the night..••••
15A

F^-S^La' BILL T3J TZL9T
(Tune- Ba-uacie Bill the Sailer)
The Air Crrpg is the Ufa for me, s.-.ii Barnacle Bill, the Sailor
Ifll Jump roy ship and leave the sea and "be an aviator
I'll fly so high I'll reach the sky, gravitation I'll defy
I!ll make the recple mean ani cry, said Barnacle Pill, the Sailer
?retty 8cr.n You'll lese that grin, said the fair y?ung maiden
Pretty seen you'll lose that grinf said the fair ycung maiden
I'm rough and tough, I knew my stuff, said Bill, tho Aviator
I'll fly this ship till I've had enough, said Bill, the Aviattr
I'tno'-/ a s*rut7 I kno** a fin, I know a "barrel roll and a spin
I knew a prep, I knew a knick, and I knew ..-n elevater
Ten1 re out of gas and must go down, wailed the fair young maiden
You're cut cf £as and must gr dr-n, wailed the fair young maiden
I'm a cckeyed Finn if I'll give in, reared Bill the Aviator
I'll fight this ship with a flyers grin, r#?.red Bill, the .nviatar
Ee kicked the "bar and pulled tho 3tick, which didn't seem to do the tri^k
And he hit the ground like a ton cf "brick, peer Barnacle Bill, The S^il^r
Here'a sr?:e fleers f^r his gr-.ve, s~Vbed the fair y-rnng maiden
Here!s s^me flr-vcrs f^r his grave, sobbed the fair yr,ung maiden
ITAZUO 6HT
(Tune- When yr.u wore a tulip)
When yru flew a.Mustang! and I flew a Mustang
In the Itazuke 6RT
ftther pilots vent to briefing
Wo stayed in the sack a'sleeping
Hotter st-nes y-.u'll never see
Ve were hotter than tabasco, when grnip pulled each fiasco
Ve excelled in proficiency
When y-u flew a mustang, and I flew a Mustang
In the Itazuke ORT
M4UIT M3 IN KYdTO
(Tune- >ieet Me in St> L-uis)
Meet me in Kyoto, Moto
*<eet me at the shrine
Take y^ur sh^es off when yu enter
Or y-u'll pay a fine
T-*e will have a^re sukiyaki
Then we'll h?ve a cup of saki
If you'll meet me in Ky^t^-, Moto
Meet me at the shrine
16

COM3 05 AO JOIN THJ AIR F«CJ3
C-me -n and yin the Air 3Srce, we!re a ha*r>y tend they s^y
' e never d^ a lik *f w-rk, «-ust fly around all day
'•'hile others ' ^rk and 3tudy hard, and s-^n gr^w old and "blind
•.Ietll take to the air without a c*re, and y-u will never nind
Chorus:
You'll never mind, you'll nevir mini
0hf erne and J-in the Air P-rce
-end Y-u will never mind
C-me -n and get promoted as high as y u desire
You're riding n a gravy train when you're an Air Force flyer
But just when you're about to oe a general you'll find
The engine c-ugh, the wings fall ^ff, and you will never mind
Y urre flying ^ver the ocean, yu hear your engine spit
You see y^ur prn? cme to a st~p, The god damn engine's quit
The ship w^n't fl~at, y-m connot sv/in, the shore is relies behind
Ch, what a dish for the crahs and fish, hut you will never mind
I fly up t- the Yalu, in my P-86
And here's one thing that y--u can sent t^ Congress in your TltfX
Ifve only g^t ^ne engine, Jack, and if that "bastard q its
It will be up there all oy itself, cause I will shit and git
f-h, s-zaeday you'll meet a Mig-15, Ee'll sh~ot yu down in flames
No use in "belly aching and calling the "bastard names
Y-u'11 i?se y^ur wings, d~n't worry mac, another pair you'll find
Yru'll fly with Fete and the angels sweet, and yu will never Mind
Oh, We're just a "bunch of Air F-rce lads, and we d^n't give a dam*
Ab^ut the groundling's p-int of view and all that sort of ham
He want a hundred ihevr^nd shix>8 of each and every kind
And new we ve got cur own Air Perce, so we will never mind
Now we're the operations hunch, and we don't give a damn
About those paper shufflin tyoes, with heads just like a ham
*e want a hundred planes or so, all ready on the line
And they c n pad those swivel chairs, and ve will never mind
Oh, come and get your "brassy rank as high as you desire
You're riding on a ravy train, when you're in the Admin' mire
The ones and fours have room for more, or sc they always find
With nor-es in place, ve don't mean en the face, you will never mind
17

6h, they "built the ship Titanic, and when they had it through
They thought they had a ship, that the water would nater ccme through
But the Icrd almighty's hand, said the ship would never land
It va? sad when that great ship went dcvrn
Chorus:
6h it was sad, 6h it was sad
It was sad when that great shi> wont down
?6 the bottom of the------
Husbands and wives, ittle Mttie children Inst their lives
It was sad when that great 3hip went drwn
T'vas ^n a tuesday morn, they were nearing 3nglands shore
And the rich refused t* associate with the poor
So they -rut the poor below where they were the first to go
It was sad when that great ship went down
They were nearing inlands sh^re and were heading f^r the d*«lc
1 hen the old ship Titanic began to reel and rock
fh the captain tried t" wire buth the wire was on fire
It was sad when that great ship went d^wn
Then the ship legan to list, find the lights began to flicker
And a drunk cried ^ut, my G-^d where is my likker
Sc they grought out the battle and they passed it all around
It was sad when that great 3hip went down
They swung the lifeboats rut, o'er the dark and 3t^ray sea
And the band struck up with Nearer My God to Thee
Little children wept and cried as the waves swept «>fer the ©Lie
It was sad when that great ship went down
THfl LITTLE GHdY BAT
6h the pale moon shone on the Har-r^om floor
The bar was closed f-r the night
Chen out of his hole came the little grey rat
Ee lapped up the liquor on the lfar-room floor
lad back en his haunches he sat
And all night leng you could hear him call
Ering on your goddamn cat
6OT VE G#
(Tune- U&LF Song)
Sack we come, off of a one hour test h-rp
From over the land and over the sea
Tor this feat we get a raise in rank
Ten days leave, and a TWO
Eeros all, as you can judge by medals
Got a lot, and we!ll get some mere
Te're ^ut to conquer, and ve will
For nothing can stop the U#S# Air Jorce
18

KAPALM
(Tuije- Titanic)
It was ut> ty srr^ri where the Yalu meets the sea
I was rjt '-■n a recce tc see what I c^uld 3ee
Vhen I spied a fanner man with his pitchfork in his hand
It was sad when my napalm went d-wn
Chrrus: It was sad, rh it was sad
It was sad when my napalm went down (hit the fanner)
There were husbands and wives
Itty "bitty children lost their lives
It was sad when my napalm went down
It wa* up fcy Euniri where I won my VTC
I was out "n a recce to see what I could see
When I 3pied a church "below and I let my rochats go
It was sad when those rr.ckets went down
Chrrus: It was sad, oh it was sad
It was sad when th-se rockets went down (dit the steeple1)
All the people ran like hell
When those rockets hit the "bell
It was sad when thnse rockets *ent down
It was up oy Siuanju where I knew that I was through
The 5Crs and the ^Cfs had shot my turhine through
It was shen I hit the silk, oh my God I strained my milk
It was cad when the pilot went down
Chorus: It was rad, oh it was sad
It was sad when that pilot went down (Hit the 'bottom)
There were husbands and wives
Itty titty children lost their lives
It was sad when that pilot went down
CHIC&SN H$m
We had some chickens, no eggs would they lay
e had some chickens, no eggs would they lay
My wife said, honey, it's striking me funny
^e're losing mmey, no eggs would they lay
One day a rooster flew into the yard
And caught the poor chickens completely off ^uard
They're laying eggs now, Just like they used to
Ever since that rooster, flew into the yard
They're laying eggs now, just like they used31 to
ever since that rooster, flew into the yard
1?

AOT I E2ARSBB Aii'TS FLYING FROM HIM
(Tune- I Learned at out Women Srom Her)
Irve handled the stick and the rudder
I've fl^n qvite a lot In my tine
I've had my share of instructors
And s^mo of >he bunch vert fine
A b^wlegged fellow fr^m Princeton
And one that va* grained at lorueil
And a fellow farm. Brocks, but they gave hiia the hooks
And the Shavetail that gave me hell
The felicw fr^m prineeton wa3 steady
Ee taught me to takerff and land
He'd net her down on three points
And l^op her to teat tke band
But when I went up for a a^lo
The Jennie was steady and trim
Veil, I landed that ship, "but I busted my kip
And I learned ab-ut flying fr.rm him
The man for Onrnoll was a bad one
A son-of~ar-gun I will say
The dirty tail-spin he gave me
Will last for many a day
I donated a lunfh to the tockpit
But he dived an£ ht spun her again
Ee gave me a howl when I dueked for the c«wl
And I learned ab^ut flying from him
The fellow from Brooks used the G-osoort
And he talked through a lung rubber tube
All that I heard was he swearing
Ee spotted me for a boob
I111 never forget one bad tailspin
Ee yelledi kick the rudder you sinm
But I didn't kick, I just wiggled the stiek
And I learned about flying from him
At last I came to formation
And took a fast ship fr^m the line
I made the first turn a humming
And brought her back upright Just fine
I sped up the ship without thinking
And hit number two in the wing
And—When I got well, the Pf5 gave me hell
And I learned about flying from him
I've handled the stick add the rudder
I've flown quite a lot in my time
I've had my share of instructors
And some of the bunch were fine
But take some straight dope from a flyer
An^ go with the navy to sea
Tcrt the ships they have there can land anywhere
And learn about flying from me*
21

WS.3L •? 61^ «rr
There were *r airplanes warming up -^n the apr~n
N't enough r~ ^m y^u culi see
i'-^v the first ninety-six were -f recent cnstructi ~n
Sat the Isst -n •-•as a Jlffc^ne D

^r.e was -Id !9? and she had a fine record
But she hadn't "been fl-'vn that year
And she creaked and groaned when they started her engine
"5V r she knew that her time w?s near
A Sec~n5 Lieutenant va dered into operations
And he asked f^r a ship <-r tw-

^nd they said, !!Y'*ung man, we are very sh^rt of airplanes
But we*ll see what we can d^-t
!!N~w the first f^rty—seven are reserved f-r Majors
And the laptains h».ve the nezt f^rty-nine
Put there's ,.no tcre ship ~n the end of the apr-n
The 1-st ship up-n the line
He was headed f^r ^<~ntiu ani frao there t^ 3hinhae
^nd he had t~ make that flight
3-?- he said, "O.K., if yu give xe a clearance
I will get there sometime tonight,
Oh, he flew over Taej>n and the Taegu airstrip
And the ceiling began t?. fall
And the clouds closed down en the tops of the momntains
And he couldn't see the gr-:uni at ail
He flew through rain and he fiev through a snowstorm
Till the light began t-- fail
When he f.-und a railroad g^ing in his direction
And he said, "I'll get there by rail.1'
He flev d:wn a valley and he dodgei through the mountains
au-I he kept that road insight
Till the rails disappeared through a hole in the mountains
And he ended his last long flight
There vac ^ld 971 vith her nose in the mountain
And her wheels upnn the track
And her throttle was "bent in the forward position
But her engine was facing "back
Now ladies please listen and heed my warning
From this time ever on
N^ver speak harsh v6rds to your flyboy husband
He may leave you ani never return.
21

SAFE HAND MAIL
(Tune- Wreck of the Old 97)
They gave him his orders at old Itazuke
Saying, "Bill, you're 'way behind time"
Take this aafe hand mail in your way weary mustang
And put 'er in Nagoya on time
Bill turned and he said to his black, greasy, crew-chief
"Is my spam-can ready to roll?
Just head !er down the runway and open up the throttle
And I'll call Camel Control."
There was one dark cluud between Bofu and Nagoya
But 3ill was a gauge pilou bold
It was in this cloud that he spun all his gyros
And his Mustang did three snap rolls
He came roarin' down the bottom doin' a million miles an hour
When the tip-tank3 came off with a scream
They found him in the wreck with his hand on the throttle
Still flying the Tokyo beam
Fare-thee well, oh fare-thee well
Old Bill broke his mustang all to hell
There'll be no more suki-haki at good old Itazuke
Fare-^hee well* oh fare-thee well
MOONSHINE
(Tune- You are my Sunshine)
You are my moonshine, my only moonshine
Ycu guide my fighters, when skies are grey
I chase your bogies, from here to Moji
Just to find they have gone the other way
The other day boys, as I was flying
I heard moonshine controller say
"I've got a bogie down by Kurume
Won?t you head your jet that-a-way?"
He said he had me in radar contact
And I believed him like a dope
I flew to Moji - and still no bogie
He had chased a fly across the scope
You were my moonshine, my only moonshine
How cov'.d you let me down this way
My chute was swingin1 - they heard me singin1
Won't you take thv'; moonshine away
22

HEBE'S TO THE REGULAR AIR FORCE
(Tune- My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean)
In peace time the regulars are happy
In peace times they're happy to serve
But let them get into a fracas
and they'll call out the God Damn reserves
Chorus: Call out, call out
Call out the God Damn reserves, reserves
Call out, Call out
Oh! call out the God Damn reserves
Here's to the regular Air Force
They have such a wonderful plan
They call up the God Damn reservist
Whenever the shit hits the fan
They call up every old pilot
They call ur> every young man
The reservists they go to Horea
The regulars stay in Jap^n
Here's to the regular Air ^orce
With medals and badges galore
If it weren't for the God Damn reservist
Their ass would he dragging the floor
Chorus 2: Fight on, fight on
Fight on, regular Air -Force
Fight on, fight on..
Fight on, fight on
Fight on regular Air^Force
Fight on
SPRING TIME ON THE YAHJ
(Tune- When It's Spring Time in the Rockies)
When it's spring time on the Yalu and the Mig's come out to play
And the contrails run in circles, fighter pilots earn their pay
We'll hold our triggers steady when our sights are zeroed in
We'll hold our glasses ready when they pass out rum and gin
When it's spring time on the lalu and the napalm is in bloom
And your 50!s do the talking and it's just a Mig and you
Once again you'll hear me whisper that my fuel is running low
When it's spring time on the yalu then it's time for us to go
23

TO THE REGULARS
(Tune- Mr. and Mrs* Mississippi)
I won't forget korea
I can't forget Kunsan
For Syngman Rhee and Joe Stalin
Have made me fell at home
I flew across the bombline
And got a hole or two
But all I got was a crock of shit
From you and you and you
Chorus: Oh I was called to risk my ass
and save the U.N* too
But all I got was a crock of shit
From you and you and you
The AA was terific
The email arms were intense
While flyboyo bombed the front lines
The division did the rest
While the regulars held their desk jobs
The reserves wore called en masse
For the U.N. knew the air reserve
Was the one to s^ve their ass
I love you -^ar old USA
With all my aching heart
If I hadn't joined the damn reserves
We'd never!ve had to part
But we won't cry and we wonft squawk
For we are not alone
For one of these days the regular's '11 come
And we can all go home
Now we don't mind the hardships
We've faced them in the past
But we wonder if our congressmen
Have had forties up their ass
We have to fight to save the peace
That's what the bastards said
But when you check the casualties
you'll find no senators "ead
I'm going to raise a family
When this war is through
I hope to have a bouncing boy
To tell my stories to
But someday when he grows up
If he joins the air reserve
I'll kick his ass from dawn to dusk
For that's what he'll deserve
24

CO PILOTS LAMENT
(Tune- The cowboys Lament)
I'm the co-pilot, . . I sit on the right
Itfs up to me to "be quick and bright
I never talk back, for I'll have regrets
And I must remember what the captain forgets
I make out the flight plan and study the weather
Pull up the gear and stand by to feather
Make out the mail forms and do the reporting
And fly the old crate when the captain is snoring
I take th* readings end adjust the power
Put on the heaters when vefre in a shower
Tell where we afe on the darkest night
And do all the book work without any light
I call for my captain and buy him cakes
I always laugh at his corny jokes
And once in a while when his landings are rusty
I come through with, :,Gawd, but it's gusty.n
All in all, I?m a general fctooge
As I sit to the right of this man scrooge
But maybe some day with great understanding
He'll saften a bit and give me a landing
BOOZIN' BUDDIES
A fighter pilot lay dying
The medics had left him for dead
All around him women were crying
And these are the words that he said
Take the tailpipe of my stomach
Take the burner out of my brain
Take the turbine out of my kidney
And assemble the unit again
For we are the boys who fly high in the sky
Bosom buddies while boozin1
We are the boys they sent out to die
Bosom buddies while boosin1
Up in headquarters they sing and they shout
Talking of things "they know nothing about
We are the boys who fly high in the sky
Bosom buddies while boozin
Bosom buddies while boozin
Bosom buddies vhile boozin
25

STAND TO YOUR GLASSES
A poor aviator lay a-dying
At the end of a bright strainers day
And his comrads were gathered around him
To carry his fragments away
Oh, his bird was piled on his wishbone
And his engine was wrapped round his head
And he wore a spark plug on each elbow
Twas plain he would shortly be dead
Oh, he spat out a valve and a gasket
As he stirred in the sump where he lay
And to his sorrowing comrades
These brave parting words did he say
I'll be riding a clud in the moriing
With no merlin before me to course
So come along and get busy
Another lad now wants the hearse
Take the manifold out of my larynx
And the cylinders out of my brain
Take the piston rods out of my kidneys
And assemble the engine again
With rusted fifties and rockets
ith pilots as old as they seem
We fly these worn out mustangs
Against the MIG-15
Forgotten by the land that bore us
Betrayed by the ones we held dear
The good have all gone before us
And only the dull are still here
So stand to your glasses steady
This world is a world full of lies
Here's 3, toast to those dead already
And here's to the next man to die
SONG OP THE ZULU WARBIORS
Ay zigga ramba rumba jrumba
Ay zigga zumbq, zumba zay
Ay zigga zumba zumba zumba
Ay zigga zumba zumba zay
Hold fem down, you Zulu warriors
Hold 'em down, you Zulu Chiefs
Chiefs Chiefs Chiefs
Chi-ga-ma-lie------oh
26

I WANTED WINGS
I wanted wings till I got the god-damned things
Now I don't want then any more
They taught me how to fly then they sent me off to die
I've had a "belly full of war
You can save those Zero's for the god-damned heros
Distinguished flying crosses do not compensate for losses, Buster
Chorus: I wanted wings till I got the god-damned things
Now I don't want then any more
I'll take the dames while the rest go down in flames
I!ve no desire to be burned
Air combat spells romance, but it makes me wet my pants
I !m not a fighter I have learned
Tou can cave thoce Mitsubitsi's for those other sons-o-bitches
Cause I'd rather lay a woman than be shot down in a Grumman, Buster
Now, I'm too young to die in a damned old PBY
That's for the eager not for me
I won't trust to luck to be picked up by a duck
After I've crashed into the sea
Caused K'd rather bo a bell hop than a flyer on a flat top
yith ray hand around a bottle not around a god-damned throttle, Buster
Now, -!clou:t care to tour over Berlin or the Ruhr
Flak always makec me 7>ark my lunch
I got no H37, Hey, when they holler bombs away
I'd rather be home with the bunch
For there's one thing you can't laugh off
And that's when they shoot your ass off
For I'd rather be home buster with my ass than with a cluster, Buster
They feed us lousy chow but we stay alive somehow
On dehydrated eggs and milk and stew
What will they think of next they'll be dehydrating sex
And on that day I'll tell the coach I'm through
For I dearly love my humpin', and I'd love to do some pumpin'
But K'd rather come with chowder, than to come with lumps of powder, Buste
Now the day that we bomber Metz, I ran out of cigaretts
I always smoke one for my gut
They nrl:e them by the ton, but I haven't got one
Oh what I'd give to have a butt
Now the home front may be pitching, but I still will do my bitching
Till I find some real sharp cookie, who can mass produce some nookie,
Buster,
27

I WANTED ^INGS
(Korean Version)
I wanted wings till I got the god-damn things
Now I don't want them any more
I donrt want a tour in Korea that's for sure
I've had a belly full of war
I do^ f '*. want my fanny frozen
In trial putrid land of Chosen
Fighting MIG's of Uncle Joe's
In an atmosphere that's frigid frozen, buster
I wanted wings till I got the god-damn things
Now I don!t want them any more
I don't want to die over Antung in the sky
MIG's always make me barf my lunch
For me there's no Hey, Hey, Screaming
Bogies that-a-way
I'd rather be h.-ae with the bunch
Now there's one thing you can't laugh off
And that's when they shoot your ass off
I would rather be home buster
With my ass than with a cluster, Buster
I wanted wing3 till I got the god-damn things
Now I don't want them any more
SQUADRON SONG
Oh, we are the boys from the 3-8-6
You lve heard so much about
Mothers keep their daughters in
Whenever we go out
We're always full of whiskey
We're always full of booze
Oh, we are the boys from 3-8-6
Now who the hell are youse
As we go marching
And the band begins to P*L*A*Y
You can hear the people shouting
Raggedy Razz, Raggedy Razz
3-8-6
Whowawa
Who owns this club, whowawa
Who owns this club, whowawa
Who owns this club, the people cried
WE own this club
Wl own this club
Three eighty sixth squadron we replied*I
28

GOOD OLD MOUNTAIN DEW
Chorus: They call it that good old mountain dew
And them that refuse it are few
I'll hush up my mug if you111 fill up qy jug
with that good old mountain dew
Therefs an old hollow tree, down the road here from me
Where you lay down a dollar or two
Then ynu go round the bend, and when you come back again
Tour jug is full of the good old mountain dew
My brother Bill, has a still on the hill
Where he runs off a gallon or two
The buzzards in the sky, get so drunk they con't fly
Just from smelling that good old mountain dew
Now my cousin Mort, he is sawed off and short
Only measures bout four foot two
But he thinks he's a giant» when rou give him a pint
Of that good old mountain dew
My old aunt June, bought some brand new perfume
And it had such a sweet smelling phew
But to her surprise, when she had it analized
It was nothing but good old mountain dew
The flak gets so thick, that it makes you feel sick
When you've been on a rail cut or two
But you'll never abort, if they'll give you a snort
Of that good old mountain dew
BLOOD ON YOUR TUNIC
An Air Force Lieutenant to Pusan did stole
He'd just coEje back from a raid on Seoul
When an old M.P. Sgt said, "Pardon mef sir
There's blood on your tunic and mud on your knees*11
Chorus: La de a, La de a
There's blood on your tunic
And mud on your knees
Sow look here Sgt, you bloody damn fool
I've just come back from a raid on Seoul
Where ack ack is flying and comforts are few
And brave men are dying for bastards like you
Now the old M.P, Sgt said, "Pardon me, sir
But on the Lt. I meant no slur
But the girls down the pusan are hard to please
With blood on your tunic and mud on your knees*"
29

THE PO RIVER VALLEY
(Tune- Red Hiver Valley)
To the Po river valley we're going
For to get us some trains and sone tracks
But if I had ny say-so about it
I'd still be back hone in the sack
Come and sit by ny side at the briefing
Do not hasten to bid me adieu
To the Po river valley were going
And I'm flying four in flight blue
We went for to check on the weather
And they said it was clear as can be
Now I lost.my wingman 'round the field
And the rest augered in out at sea
S-2 said there's no flak where we're going
S-2 asid there's no flak on the way
There's a dark overcast o'er the target
I'm begining to doubt what they say
1 spitfire went by like a whirlwind
And a mustang went by like a breese
And a C-46 with one feathered
Went by towing five L-3's
To the Po river valley we're going
And many strange sights we will see
But the one there that held my attention
Was the flak that they threw up at me
FAREWELL TO ANTUNG UNIVERSITY
Farewell to Antuxjg University, I have risen to reality
Forty thousand is no place for me, with MIG-15's in the vicinity

^ith cannon balls flying all around, Makes me wish that I'd stayed on the
ground
I should join the infantry, or take the navy and go out to sea
Where did red leader go, when I called out "Bingo"
That's what I' like to know, just where'n hell did he go
He called "Red flight, BREAK RIGHT," all I did was tuck in tight
He climbed up in the sun and that's where the fun begun,
Flashes behind me, flashes all around
Flashes above mef and flashes on the ground,
I called "Red leader, where in the hell did you roam?
Clear yourself and ride the mach cause I am going home'"
30

BLESS THEM ALL
Bless them all9 Bless them all
The needle, the airspeed the ball
Bless all the instructors
Who taught ne to fly
Sent me up to solo and. left me to die
So if ever your blow jet should stall
You1 re due for one hell of a fall
No lillies or violets for dead fighter pilots
So cheer up my lads, Bless them all
Bless them all, Bless them all
The long and the short and the tall
Bless all the sergeants
The sour puss ones
Bless all the Corporals and their dopey sons
Cause we're saying goodby to them all
The long and the short and the tall
■There'll be no promotions this side of the ocean
So while we are here bless them all
CHIfOSE BLUES
(Tune- Ci^areets and Whiskey)
Once I was happy and had a dsar wife
I had enough Ten to last me for life
I met with a Josan and we went on a spsee
She started me smokin1 and drinkin1 Said.
Chorus: Clgareets and Saki and wild wild Josans
They'll drive you crazy, they'll drive you insane
Cigareets and Saki and will wild Josans
They'll drive you crazy, they'll drive you insane
I went to Asmuchi, a bath for to take
I met me a Josan who was on the make
The bath it was hot and the Josan was too
If you go to Asmuchi my boys you are through
I went to my room, some sleep for to get
She said no sleep boy, with me there's no sweat
I woke the next morning at quarter past ten
She says, "Hey Yankee, thats four thousand Yen."
I'm back in Chitose where we sing and we shout
Me and the Doc are sweating it out
He gave me some pills from a jug on the shelf
Then he poured out a dozen or two for himself,
31

CIGARETTES AND WHISKEY
Once I was happy when I was a lad
We had no sweat when we flew the Spad
They sent me to YMB, the Duces to fly
Since that time, live been ready to die#
Take it from me hoys, its quite a plane *
Enough dampners and juides to drive you insane
Goes from the ground to forty at gate
But after that Pinkerton will want you to wait.
Delta wingsf Q pots and a crazy cockpit
It'll drive you apeshit, it'll drive you insane
No push rods or cables to bank it or dire
Just turn on the dampners and ride it alive,
Pinkerton tower is built out of glass
It's forty feet high and really has class
They give you some trouble when leaving the ground
The Cleveland-center $ust won't let you down
CHORUS:
Pinkerton and Cleveland and wild wild Gasbag
They111 drive you ape shit they'll drive you insane
Emergency experiences and ATC clearances
They'll drive you ape, they'll drive you Insane•
31A

KUNI^RI AND ANTUNG
(Tune-Cigareets and Whiskey)
Once I was happy and had a good deal
Flew Fox-Eighty-Sixes at old Victorville
They asked for a volunteer, said, "1811 take you"
The next thing I knew I was stuck in Taegul
Chorus: Kuni-ri and Antung, and wild wild Pyong-yang
They'll drive you crazy, they'll drive you insane
Quad fifties and forties and one hundred sorties
They'll drive you crazy, they'll drive you insane
We go down to briefing while it is still night
We lift off the runway before it is light
We form in the gloom and we're off on cur way
We're over the target before it is day
We're up to the Yalu, there's cons overhead
We think of the Wheels who are snug in their beds
We drop our big tips and we break to the right
"Josie" we cry -with all of our might
We steer on 280, we're up in the soup
We swear that the leader is doing a loop
Break out in the clear and set down on K-2
Be careful or Willie will write about you
Oh the Chosen is frozen and all wet with ice
From thirty-five thousand she looks mighty nice
But ask a foot soldier and he'll set you plumb straight
It's covered with Reds blood imbeded with hate
Oh the MIG is a blot on the whole human race
A man is a monkey to give one a chase
Here's my description, take warning dear brother
There's fire on one end, but cannons on t'other
Went up to KIG alley, S-2 said "No Sweat"
If I hadn't looked 'round, I'd be up there yet
Six KEGS jumped our ass, and the leader yelled "BREAK"
Got back to K-10, how my knees they did shake
If I fly a hundred and they ask for more
I'll tell them to jam it, my ass is too sore
They can ram it and jam it for all that I care
Just give me a W ng job, a desk and a chair
I went on my mission to cut a rail track
They said, "There's no sweat 'cause there ain't any flack"
But the guns from that place would make day out of night
Oh god how I wish all I did was dog fight
Oh it's up to the Yalu in my flying machine
The Sui-Ho Reservoir is plainly seen
But MIG's out of Antung sent sweat down my back
So I head towards Kanggye and get shot down by flack
32

KUHI-RI AND ANTUNG (Con!t)
I grabbed those two handles and squeezed---what a sound
A kick in the ass, soon I!m floating toward ground
I showed them my blood chit, they said, "No sweat mac"
They hand me an a Frame, now I'll walking back
HUTCH's BALLAD
(Tune - Sure a Little Bit of Heaven)
Sure, out target it was bunkers
Way out in the hills so grand
Located in Korea, right next to no-mans land
Our fans now they were G.I!s
And they thought our Mustangs grand
As we circled o'er the target
Watching "Willie Peter"land
But our controller was neurotic
Near the ground he wouldn't go
We toggled off our babies
And we watched them hit below
He had placed his rockets wildly
And he'd fouled the whole damn show
But when we got the grading
Sure it was Zero - Zero
Sure, a little bit of airplane fell
From out the sky one day
It landed we at of Pyongyang
Not "frery far away
Comet Red won*t be coming back
It made us very blue
But we went on to our target
And we dropped out babies true
So, we sprinkled it with fifties
Just to keep their heads down low
Then we hurried back to S-2
To lie about our show
When you read it in the papers
All about the 18th's capers
You will know it's propaganda
For old Barcus, bless his soul
THE CUCKOO SONG
Now the Cuckoo is a strange bird
It sits on the grass
With its wings neatly folded
and its beak up its ass
From this strange position
It seldom does flit
For it's hard to say "Cuckoo"
With a beak full of---Sweet Violets etc.,
33

SAVE A FIGHTER PILOTS ASS
(Tune- ftirow a Nickel on the Drum)
I t was midnight in Korea
All the pilots were in "bed
When up stepped Colonel
And this is what he said
Sabres, gentle Sabres, Sabres one and all
Pilots, gentle Pilots, And all the pilots shouted BALLS
When up stepped a young Lieutenant
With a voice as harsh as brass
"You can Take those God Damn Sabre Jets and shove then up your ass
Chorus: Oh Halleluia, Oh Halleliua, Throw a nickel on the grass
Save a fighter pilots ass
Oh Halleluia, Oh Halleluia, Throw a nickel on the grass
And you'll be saved
Cruising down the Yalu, doing six-twenty per
There cane a call from the Major, 6h won't you save me sir
Got three big flak holes in my wings, my tanks ain't got no gas
Mayday, Mayday, Mayday, got six MIG's on my ass
I shot my traffic pattern, to me it looked all right
The airspeed read one-thirty, my God I racked tt tight
The airframe gave a shudder, the engine gave a wheeze
Mayday, Mayday, Mayday, spin instructions please
Fouled up my crosswind landing, the left wing hit the giround
There came a call from the tower, pull up and go around
I racked the Sabre in the air a dozen feet or more
The engine quit, I almost shit, the gear came through the floor
Split S onto my bomb run, I got too God Damn low
I pressed the bloody vutton, Let both my babies go
I sucked the stick "back in my gut, I hit a high speed stall
Now I won't see my mother when the works all done this fall
They sent me up to f^ongyang, the brief said "Skoshe ack ack"
But by the time I got there, my wings were hnled by flak
Jfy aircraft wont into a spin, it would no longer fly
Mayday, Mayday, Mayday, I am too young to die
I bailed out from that Sabre, my landing was top line
With my E and E equipment, I made for our front line
When I opened up my ration tin, to see what was in it
The God Damn Qaartermaster, had filled the thing with shit
Now in this Commie prison camp, I am obliged to sit
For one canot go ver for, en a ration tin of shit
If I am ever free again, I will no longer fly
But I'll have Quartermaster bollix, for breakfast till I die
34

SATE A FIGHTER PILOT'S ASS (Con't)
Ohf while rolling down the runway, and headed for the ditch
I looked down at ny prop, my God it!s in high pitch
I pulled "back on the stick, and rose into th9 air
Glory, Glory, Halleluia, how did I get there
The boys up from that other group, they think they are so hot
They brag about the "Bluetails", that they've so often shot
One thing they don't remember, when ere they holler and hoot
Is to look into their mirror, just before they shoot
Ihear we're leaving Europe, they say we're going home
They tell us nc more wandering, never more we'll roam
But the Colonels up at Langley, are planning on the sly
Just where they're gonna sent us, on our next TDT
I started on my takeoff, I thought the flaps were down
But when I pulled the gear up, the dive brake scraped the ground
The General he smiled at me, he thought it was great fun
But then I met the F.E.B., Chitose here I come
We flew our Sabres through the war, we flew them far and fast
But when the war was over, we knew it couldn't last
They sent our old instructors, to teach us all their tricks
So now we're flying training, behind those dirty pricks
Letting down from forty-four, busting through the mach
that Sabre Jet was moving now, falling like a rock
My boom was aimed right at the field, there was an awful sound
Since we're flying training now, I'm sitting on the ground
I started up into a loop, I thought that I was clear
I pulled up under Colonel Blood, I thought the end was near
I went before the F.E.B. t and they gave me the works
Glory, Glory, Halleluia, what a bunch of jerks
Strafin1 on the panel, I amde ny pass too low
There came a call from Melrose, "One more and home you go"
I pulled that Sabre in the flue, she hit a high speed stall
Now I won't see my mother, when the work's all done this fall
Now I'm in the gutter, with pretzels in my beer
With pretzels in my whiskers, I knew the end was near
Bien came this glorious Air Force, to save me from the worst
Every body bust a butt and sing the second verse
35

PUSAN U
(Tune- Sioux City Sue)
We were roaning round the countryside
•Twas down near Pusan Bay
We stepped into a local bar
To pass the time away
I net a gal from old Chin Ju
She was a sight to view
I asked her where she cane fron
And she asid, "Pusan U#"
Chorus: Oh Pusan Uf Oh Pusan U
The finest school in all the land
The University that's grand
Oh Pusan U, Oh Pusan U
I hail ny Alna Mater
Oh Pusan TJf to yo*
I enrolled in that great college
Founded "by Kin Pac Su
'Twas built of honeybuckets
So they called it Pusan U
The smell it was terrific
But fortune saw me through
So now I left this glass
To the school of Pusan U
Chorus: <h Pusan Ut Oh Pusan U
Your course is good for engineers
A-frames, ox carts pulled by steers
Oh Pusan,U, Oh Pusan U
I hail my Alma Mater
Oh Pusan U, to you
I saw a girl most beautiful
She was a sight to view
She won a beauty contest
She was crowned Miss Pusan U
They spotted her in Hollywood
Now she's a star there too
When asked to what she owes her fane
She says, "Oh Pusan U#"
REPEAT FIRST CHORUS:
We havean A-l baseball tean
We win our games straight through
They ask us where we cone fron
And we say, "Pusan U"
We have a pitcher who is tops
Our batter8 are good too
And every time we cone to bat
The crowd yells, "Pusan U"
REPEAT SECOND CHORUS:
36

STRAFIN1 ROUND THE MOUNTAIN
(Tune - She'll Ee Comin Round the Mountain)
Now listen all you airmen young and old
To the tale of Fighter Pilots young and bold
With their fighters painted yellow
Leaping off to contact Mellow
In the crisp Korean air so blue and cold
It v/as dive bomb old Sxnuiju, stop the Reds
Eight one thousand pounders, loader, instand heads
Four birds lined up on the runway
Wish I'd gone to church on Sunday
Hope we catch those lousy Commies in their beds
Twenty thousand over Pyongyang on Northwest
Gas Mask flight about to face the acid test
Till at least the Yalu River
Which makes my liver quiver
With flak guns lined up twenty-four abreast
Dust clouds rool up from Antung cross the way
Twenty swept wing Chinese war birds out to play
Thirty-sevens, twenty-threes
All lit up like Christmas trees
Tip tanks salvoed off we leap into the fray
Kimpo tower clear the pattern in great haste
Twenty victory roll out pilots do with grace
It was thrilling, it was hairy
Near that privilidged sanctuary
S Tighman Rhce will soon be president of this place
Kimpo tower this is Gas Mask through with this damn war
I am flying on to Taegu
Heading one-five-two to K—2
Cause they're sending back to Moscow for some more
A Navy Prayer
Our father, who art in Washington
Eisenhower is thy name
The Navy!s done
The Air Force won
On the Atlantic, as in the Pacific
Give us this day, our appropriations
And forgive us our accusations
As we forgive our accusers
Lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from Matthews and Johnson
For thine is the power
The B-52 and ths Air Force
Forever and ever. Ainnan
37

THE SCOTCH WEDDING
Prelude: There was a ball a bloody great ball, the ball of Kerr:
Four and twenty prostitutes shaggin on the moor
Oh the King was in his counting house, counting out his wealth
The Queen was in the bed room, playing with herself
Chorus: Singing I'll do ye this time, I'll dee it noo
The mon that did it last night, could na do it noo
Oh the bride was in the bedroom, explaining to the groom
The vag'na not the rectum, is the entrance to the womb
Oh the parsons wife she was there, seated down in front
A wreath of roses round her neck, a carrot up her cunt
Oh the village parson he was there, and very surprised to see
Four and twenty maidenheady hanging from a tree
Oh the parsons daughter she was there, she had them all in fits
Diving off the mantlepiece, and landing on her tits.
They were fucking in the haylofts, fucking in the ricks
You could na hear the music for the slushing of the pricks
They were fucking in the barley; fucking in the oats
Some were fucking sheep and some were fucking goats
Oh the village blacksmits, he was there, his hammer and his awls
Talking to the queen and showing off his balls
They were fucking in the parlors, fucking on the stairs
You could na see the carpets for the come and curly hairs
The village idiot he was there, a making like a fool
Pulling his foreskin over his head and whistling through his tool
Plowman Jock he was there, the bugger would na dance
Sitting with a hard on, and a waiting for his chance
The firey Colonel he was there, he'd fit amongst the Boers
He jumped upon the table and shouted for the whores
The village cripple he was there, he couldna do* ver much
So he laid them on the carpet, and he fucked them with his crutch
The chimneysweep and he was there, we had to put him oot
For every time he farted, he filled the room with soot
The village postman he was there, he had a dose of pox
He couldna fuck his lassie so he fucked the letter box
And when the ball was over, and the folks went home to rest
They said they enjoyed the music, but the fucking was the best
38

CALL OUT THE ABMY AHD THE NAVY
Monday I touched her on the ankle
"Saesday I touched her on the knee
Wednesday with success, I lifted up her dress
Thursday her chemise, Gor Blimey
Friday I put my hand upon it
Saturday night she gave me balls a tweak
And Sunday after supper, I rammed the old boy up her
And now I fM paying seven bob a week, Gor Blimey
Chorus: I don't want to join the Ariay
I don't want to go to war
I just want to hang around
Picadilly underground
Living of the earnings of a high born lady
Don't want a bullet up my arse hole
Don't want me buttocks shit away
I'd rather be in England
In Jolly Jolly England
And fornicate me bloddy life away
Call out the Army and the Navy
Call out the rank and file
Call out the royal territorials
They face danger with a smile
Call out the boys of the old brigade
That made old England free
You can call out me Mother
Me sister and me Brother
But for God's sake don't call me, Gor Blimey
TAEGU GIRLS
We are from Taegu, Taegu are we
We don't believe in virginity------Oh horse-shit
We don't use candles we use broom handles
We are the Taegu girls
And every night at twelve on the clock
We watch the white man piss on the EOK
We like the way he handles he cock
We are the Taegu girls
And every year at our annual dance
We go around without any pants
We like to give those pilots a chance
We are the Taegu, talk about your Taegu, We are the taegu girls
*f0

POOR LITTLE ANGELINE
She was sweet sixteen, s e was the village queen
Pure and innocent was Angeline
She never had a thrill, was a virgin still
Poor little Angeline
Now at the village fair, the Squire was there
Masturbating on the village square
When he chanced to see, the dainty little knee
Of poor litle Angeline
So he raised his hat, and he said your cat
Has been ridden o'er and smashed quite flat
But it isn't too far, and I've got my car
Poor little Angeline
N0w they hadn't gone far, when he stopped the car
And dragged her in to the nearest bar
Where he filled her with gin, to tempt her to sin
Poor little Angeline
When he'd filled her quite well, he dragged her to a dell
Where he attempted to give her hell
By trying his luck, at a low down fuck
With poor little Angeline
With a cry of rape, he raised her cape
Poor little girlie there was no escape
Unless someone came, to save the name
Of poor little Angeline
But sad to say, on that very same day
HE'd been sent to jail and there to stay
For coming in his pants at the local dance
With poor little Angeline
Now the window of his cell, overlooked the dell
Wherein the squire was giving her hell
As they lay on the grass, he recognized the ass
Of poor little Angeline
So with a mighty start, and a hearty fart
He blew the prison bars wide apart
And he ran like shit, lest the squire should split
Poor little ^ngeline
When he got to the spot, and saw what was what
He tied the villains pinis in a knot
As he lay upon his guts, he got a kick in the guts
From poor little Angeline
Con't next page

POOR LITTLE ANGELINE (Con't)
Oh dear blacksmith bold, I love you true
And I can tell by your trousers that you love roe too
As I'M all undressed, you had better do the rest
Said poor little Angeline
THE RIVER RAN RED
(Tune - Ritanic)
Number one was having fun, number two got quite a few
Number four got some more as he said
Oh the river ran red with the blood of the dead
As we came around and tried to get some more
The road was full of ruts, and the ruts were full of guts
Little children sucking tits had them shot right from their mits
Oh the river ran red with the blood of the dead
As we came around and tried to get some more
There were women in the crown, little children cried aloud
But they all carried guns for the foe
There were some who turned around, when they heard that awful sound
As we came around" and tried to get some more
Oh it seemed an awful crime, as we shot them in their prime
But they got number three, don't you see
Yes they shot him down with flak, and they broke his bloody back
As we came around and tried to get some more
Number one was havirig fun, Number two got quite a few
Number four got some more as he said
Oh the river ran red with the blood of the dead
As we came around and tried to get some more
STRAFERS
When I was a cadet, an innocent lad
The Chaplin told me the good from the bad
And of all his words, these were his last
Never fly high and never fly fast
So I joined up the strafers with these words in mind
And off to New Guinea did go
But when I got there I was to find
The strafers fly too gosh darn low•••Oh
We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare
Therefs smoke in the cockpit and grey in out hair
The tracers looks fine as strafing we go
But brother you're flying just too gosh darn low

OLD SOLDIERS NEVER DIE
Then up and spoke a sailors wife
And she was dressed in green
And in one corner of her funny little thing
She had a submarine
She had a submarine my boys
With conning tower complete
And in the other corner she:Jiadihalf the fucking fleet
Chorus: She had those dark and dreamy eyes
With a whiz bang up her nighty
Singing Hi Jack, come and have a skin back
Come and have a bang at Liza, singing
Old solders never die, they just smell that way
Then up and spoke the gunners wife
And she was full of fun
And in one corner of her funny little thing
She had a vickers gun
She had a vickers gun my boys
With the breech block and the sear
And in the other corner she had provisions for a year
Then up and spoke the pilots wife
And she was chewing gum
And in one corner of her funny little thing
She had a fiftt-one
She had a fifty-one my boys
Two napalms and six guns
And in the other corner she had rockets by the tons
Then up and spoke the skippers wife
*nd she was dressed in black
And in one corner of her funny little thing
She had a fishing smack
She had a fishing smack my boys
The oarlocks and the oars
And in the other corner she had bags and bags of sores
Then up and spoke the jockey^s wife
and she was dressed in red
And in one corner of her funny little thing
She had a horses head
She had a horses head my boys
The bridle and the bit
And in the other corner sher, had bags and gabs of shit
Then up and spoke the brewers wife
And she was dressed in grey
And in one corner of her funny little thing
She had a brewers dray
She had a brewers dray my boys
The barrels and the beer
And in the other corner she had syph and ghonnorhea
A3

ON TOP OF OLD PYONGYANG
(Tune-On top of old Smokey)
On top of old Pyongyang, all covered with flak
I lost my poor wingman, he'll never come back
For flying is pleasure, and dying is grief
And a quick triggered commie, is worse than a thief
For a thief will just rob,you, and take all you save
But a quick triggered Commie, will sen& you to the grave
And the grave will destroy you, and turn you to dust
Not one MIG in a thousand, a Sabre Jet can trust
Now when the bad weather, keeps.the ships down
All day we can hear, this horrible sound
Attention all pilots, now listen to this
There111 be a short meeting, That you dare not miss
They111 give us some lectures, then give us some more
But we have all heard them, twenty-five times or more
Now listen you trainees, you cant fight the feroup
Whatever they tell you, is superfluous poop
ON TOP OF OLD FUJI
On top of old Fuji, all covered with snow
I lost my jet pilot, from flying too low
He put on an air show, he did it for me
On top of Mt Fuji, he clobbered a tree
With throttle wide open, he made his last pass
At altitude zero, he busted his ass
RED NOSED MIGS
(Tune - Shrimp Boats)
Oh the red nose MiGfs are comin1
Not a Sabre in sight
Oh the red nose MiG's are comin'
And they want to fight
Let's hurry, hurry, hurry home
Oh won't you hurry, hurry, hurry home
Oh the red nose MiG's are comin
Not a Sabre in sight
MIG 15
(Tune-I Thought I taw a Puttycat)
I fought I taw a MiG-15, A tweeping up on me
I did, I did, I taw him, As big as he could be
I am that great big M$G-15, Ivan is my name
And if I catch that f84, I'll shoot him down in flame

ON TOP OP MT M3ALY
On top of Mount Mealy
All covered with snow
Lie an all-weather pilot
and hi8 fearless HO
Now he put on an air show
He did it for ne
At altitude zero
He clobbered a tree
Hi8 gyros did tunble
he guages did lie
but with canopy under
is no way to fly
With a hundered percent on
He made his last pass
With throttles wide open
He busted his ass
He said that he loved me
and would do ne no harm
On top of Mount Mealy
He purchased the farm
Bye Bye Cherry
Back your ass against the wall
Here I come balls and all
Bye Bye Cherry
I ain't got a helluva lot
But what I got will fill your twat
Bye Bye Cherry
Wrapyour legs around me tighter
make my load come a little lighter
Shake your ass and wiggle your tits
Till my big John Henry spits
Bye Bye Cherry
Wf^A

THE CAMEL
The crew they all ride in the dory
The captain he rides in the gig
It don't go a damn bit faster
But it makes the old "bastard feel big
Chorus: Signing toraly toraly toraly A
Toraly Toraly A
It don't go a damn bit faster
But it makes the old bastard feel big
The eexual life of a camel
Is greater than anyone thinks
In moments of amorous passion
He often makes love to the sphinx
Now the sphinx's posterier organs
Are blocked by the sands of the nile
Which accounts for the hump on the camel
And the sphinx's inscrutable smile
Exhaustive experimentation
By Darwin and Huxley and Hall
Has proved that the ass of a hedgehog
Can hardly be Jiggered at all
Oh why don't the boys down at Harvard
Do like the boys down at Yale
They pull all the quills from the hedgehog
So it's easy to grab by the tail
Here's to the girls of North Adeems
And here's to the streets that they roam
And here'8 to their dirty faced bastards
God bless them they may be our own
Here':s to old fort Massachusetts
And here's to the old Mohawk trail
And here's to those indian maidens
They gave us ou? first piece of tail
OLD B:«]ER BOTTLES
It was only an old beer bottle
Floating on the foam
It was only an old beer bottle
Ten thousand miles from home
In side was a pieco of paper
With these words written on
Who ever finds this bottle
Will find the beer all gone

TATS ON THE ROOF TOP
The hippopotamus so it seems, seldom if ever has wet dreams
But when he does, he cones in streams
As we revel in the joys of copulation
Chorus: Cats on the roof tops, cats on the tiles
Cats with the syphillis, cats with the piles
Cats with their ass holes wreathed in smiles
As we revel in the joys of copulation
Down in the Pampas, down in the grass, mama armadillo has an iron
But papa armadillo has a prick of brass /hound Ass
As we revel in the joys of copulation
Way down south where the alligators roar
There isn't such a thing as an alligator whore
Cause all the alligators are too sore
As we revel in the joys of copulation
Oh the elephant is a funny old bloke
Who very seldom gets his poke
But when he does he lets it soak
As we revel in the joys of copulation
Ch the ostrich is a funny old dick
It isn't very often that he dips his wick
But when he does he dips it quick
As we revel in the joys of copulation
___________is a friend of mine
His dub he very seldom pounds
3ut when he does the walls resound
As we revel in the joys of copulation
POOR BUT HONEST
Oh she was poor hut she was honest
The victim of a rich mans whim
When she met that southern gentleman- Leo Daniels
And she had a child by him
Now he sits in the govemers mansion
Making laws for all mankind
While she walks the streets of Austin- Austin Texas
Selling chunks of her behind
It's the rich what gets the glory
It18 the poor what getB the blame
It's the same the whole world over - Over Over
Now ain't that a God Damn shame
46

PIPER LAURIE
Salvation Army, Salvation Army
Standing on the corner in the night Bight night
Beating on your flrua with your finger up your hung
Singing mama hold my pee-pee while I pee
Sergeant Major, Sergeant Major
Standing in your uniform so bri:\t bright bright
Saluting with your hand with your bollix in the sand
Singing Corporal hold my pee-pee while I pee
Naughty Baby, Naughty Baby
Keeping all the neighbors up at night night night
Standing on your head in the middle of the bed
Singing mama hold me pee-pee while I pee
General Barcus, General Barcus
Looking at your stars so big and bright bright bright
Coming down the hill singing Colonel have a thrill
Singing Colonel hold my Dee-pee while I pee
Piper Laurie, Piper Laurie
Having skoshie chop-chop at the club, club, club
As I gaze into your eyesand my pee-pee starts to rise
Singing Piper hold my pee-pee while I pee
ACE IN THE HOLE
Oh the world is full of guys, who think they're might wise
Just because they know a thing or two
You can see them night and day strolling up and down broadway
Celling of the tlings that they can do
Oh there are wise men and there are boozers
Con men and crap shooters, they all hang around the Metropole
Wearing fancy ties and collars, where do they get those dollars
They all have that ace down in the hole
Some of them write to the old folks, for <SoIn
That's their old ace in the hole
Others have girls on the old tender-16in
That's their old ace in the hole
They'll tell you of places that they're going to see
From Frisco to the old north pole
But their name would be mud, like a chump flaying stud
If they lost that old ace in the hole
47

THE MISSION
(Tune-The thing)
I looked upon the schedule and was as happy as a king
For once I had a mission when I wasn't flying wing
I went down to the briefing room and my tiger blood went ping
For there sat Major Nichols and they had me on his wing
For there sat Major Nichols and they had me on his wing
The mission was all briefed to go at quarter after nine
Big Dog had given us all the poop, the weather it was fine
"One work of advice," he said to us, "Though I hate to spoil your fun
Stay out from in front of that MiG-15, it!s too big a gun
Wc were sugerin' around away up there as watchful as could be
Reichman said, "Take a look at six and see what you can seei"
I took a look at six O'clock and much to my suprise
I discovered a MiG-15, right before my eyes
I discovered a MiG-15, right before my eyes
The cannon balls were flying around as thick as they could be
I took one look and said, says I, this ainft no place for me
I rolled it over and sucked it through and took it down below
Sayin' get out of here with that BOOM BOOM BOOM and don't come back no more
Sajrin' get out of here with that BOOM BOOM BOOM and don't come back no more
I shoved the throttle to the wall a runnin' for my life
Skelton said, "Come back you coward and join in£o the strife."
"Your ass," said I with quaking voice, "This ain't no place for me."
So I racked it up and pulled it around and took it out to sea
So I racked it up and pulled it around and took it out to sea.
I rolled it out of that six G turn out over the briny deep
That MiG could not have followed cause I sure racked it steep
But when I looked back, Oh there he sat, as fat as he could be
And he was shooting those cannon balls, and they were coming right at me
And he was shooting those cannon balls, and they were coming right at me
I took a hit upon the wing, another in the tail
The way that Sabre was lurchin' around I'd surely have to bail
I braced my self and said a prayer and pulled the handle red
Oh, if I hadn't gotten out of that flaming wreck, I'd surely wound up dead
Oh, if I hadn't gotten out of that flaming wreck, I'd surely wound up dead
The moral of this story is, if you're up in a flight
And you've got a mig at six o'cloct, and he's all tucked in tight
DON'T ever roll out or pull it up, that's my advice to you
Cause you'll never get rid of the Son of a Bitch, no matter what you do
Cause you'll never get rid of the Son of a Bitch, no matter what you do

SPOT PROMOTION
(Tdne- Cold Cold Heart)
I've tried, so hard my friend, to think
That rank was worth a lot
But now you've gone and got yourself
Promoted to a spot
Your job is one that could "be done
By any PFC
How can I get your ass shipped out
And get that spot for me
Ton: 11 "be a full bird soon, my friend
Of that I have no doubt
The t?ols being changed right now
They ripped it inside out
Lieutenant General, Wing CO
The staff all gets one star
At least welll have some rank arouhd
To help us fight the war
Another week or two in grade
We'll put you in again
You needn't wait to loam your job
That's for enlisted men
The only thing I envy is
The talent that you got
How can I get your ass shipped out
And get your open spot
AIN'T IT A BLOODY SHAME
(Tune- Poor but Honest)
We were fat back in the Truman's
Drinking beer, and sometimes wine
When they said, "You're going over
To Korea's fighting line."
We were young and we were eager
To get one hundred and go home
But they slipped the finger to us
And left us here - far o'er the foam
Now they sit in FEAF Headquarters
Making rules so much unkind
It'8 the same the whole world over
Isn't it a bloody shame
Shed a tear when you think of us
Sitting here on old K-2
While you sleep with all our sweethearts
As we fly the old Yalu
1*9

EARLY A30RT
(Tune- KacMamaraf s Band)
Oh, my name is CqIqdpI ________.I'm the leader of the group
Just step into my "briefing roon, I'll give you all the poop
I'll tell you where the Commie is, and where the flak is black
I'll he the last one off the deck, Is 11 he the first one back
Chorus: Early abort, avoid the ruch, early abortf avoid the rush
Early abort, avoid the rush
Oh my nane is Colons!_____________ I!o Ihe leader of the group
Ny name is Major_____./>nd I lead old liberty
And if I go on rail cuts, 1:7 boys will follow me
But if you say Pyong-Yang, I:n tell you what I'll do
Get into yon* plcne and go ahsad, aid I'll wait here for you
I*m sure you!vo hcnrd of night^rcc* and the things they do
But if you'll cotno do\*n to the line, you'll see they're far from true
The pilots i-.hsy arc ready. b*:t let the skipper shout
And all those bastards ^'cll e.t onee, ilVj mags they won't check out I"
And then I'm sur3 you know of the leaders in the wing
Any night in tho 0 C"-"j yon e^n bear how well they sing
With words they fight a hell of a v/ar, they say they wanta go too
But j^st you gi/3 then half a chance, and here's what they will do
Oh I fly the old Invader, and Douglas says it's great
But vrhen it comas to fighting MIG?s, those bastards just don't rate
I was born to be a fighter, to grapple in the blue
But when It 00233 to fighting MIG's, I'll tell you what I'll do
N0w we'll all line up and take off. and set our course at ten
And when v;e re^ch the no return, we'll all turn back again
We111 call the tower and get a steer, we don't know where we've been
Drop your tanks and crnopies, peel off the belly in
Ch we fly those bloody octree at a hundred bloody feet
We can fly thr~ *.n tho rain an I fog, and in the bloody sleet
We think we're iiyi:3£ bloody liig-.. we're flying bloody low .
And we make ovr blo?dy landfall at the Firth of bloody Forth
Oh we fly those Moody ~abr3s at a hundred bloody feet
We can fly them in the rain and fog, and in the bloody sleet
And when we :re flying bloody high, we're flying bloody low
And we hit the sark?r ocicon ouch an awful bloody blow
Now when this v<r,r is over and we:re back in t-"ie U.S.A.
We'll fly th3 plauec in all var gaunes, and do what the Generals say
But if we have another war and they give us the '86
To hell with all the general staffs, we won't get in that fix
50

THE FAIRCHILD ABORTION
(Tune- Strawberry Roan)
Out on the flight line one cold Sunday morn
Sat the Fairchild Abortion all battered and torn
The wings were sagging, the tires were flat
do form one had a red line, I111 bet you on that
We fired up both engines with mixtures full rich
And took to the runway with that son of a bitch
We pushed on the power, sh farted and stalled
And got off the runway, no airspeed at all
We call to the tower, "Single Engine,11 we say
"What the hell," said the tower, "We got then all day"
"Go around," said the tower, "We can't let you land
We got Gooks on the runway dragging off sand
We milked up the flaps, and rolled in the trim
Over the tree tops that old wreck she did skim
We turned on final and free fell the gear
The engineer munaered, "Please have no fear"
The pilot was scared, the Co-pilot too
The engineer had all he could do
The runway was coming and coming up fast
One third of the runway had already passed
We pulled off power and she settled in fast
That on-twenty-three had landed at last
BLACKBIidS
(Tune- Bye Bye Blackbird)
Here we stand on the ground
We won't take off till the sun goes down
We fly Blackbirds
Go in low and come out fast
Keep those fighters off our ass
We fly Blackbirds
No one here can ever understand up
You should hear the malarky they hand us
Mix those drinks and mix em right
Because we're standing down tonight
Blackbirds we fly
DIRTY LIL
Dirty Lil, Dirty Lil
Lives on top of garbage hill
Never took a bath
Never will
Achl PtueJ Dirty HI
51

KATHUSEISM
In ancient days there lived a maid
Who used to ply a filthy trade
A prostitute of ill repute
The harlot of Jeruselem
Chorus: Hi Ho Kathuselem the harlot of Jeruselem
Hi Ho kathuselem the daughter of the Babbi
Kathuselem fs snatch was bold and bare
Upon her gash there grew no hair
For hair won*t grow on a thorogare
Like the snatch of old Eathuselen
Kathuselem13 cunt was round and red
For forty years it had not bled
It smelled as though it had been dead
Since the founding of Jeruselem
How Kathuselem was a willey witch
A god damn fucking son of a bitch
And every pecker that had the itch
Had dangled in Kathuselem
Next door there lived a giant tall
His prick of steelictuld smash a wall
His balls hung down like basketballs
The ^lant of old Jeruselem
One ni^ht returning from a spree
A quite consistant jubilee
His balls hung will below his knee
He chanced to cross Kathuseelem
And so he challanged her to fuck
And wishing her the best of luck
He led her to a shady nook
And ther unfurled his might hook
He led her to a shady nook
And there unfurled his nighty hook
For forty yards it throbbed and shook
the Walls of old Jeruselem
This giant of old was underslung
He missed her cunt and hit her bung
And with his giant pecker stung
The pride of all Jeruselem
Kathuselem she knew her art
She cocked her ass and blew a fart
She blew him like a bloody dart
Through the walls of old Jeruselem
Aand ther he lay a broken mass
His cock all bent with shit and gas
And Kathuselem got up and wiped her ass
All over the walls of Jeruselem $2

SEOUL CITY SUB
(Tune- Sioux City Sue)
I drove a herd of oxen down
Till reached old Bong Chong way
And there I net a gook girl
Who said she!d like to play
Her clothes were of a dirty bine
Her hands and feet were too
I asked her what her name was
She asid, "Seoul City Sue."
Chorus: Seoul City Sue, Seoul City Sue
Tour hair is "black, your eyes are too
I!d swap my honey cart for you
Seoul City Sue, Seoul City Sue
No one smells of Kimchie
Like ny sweet Seoul City Sue
Ch, Korea, I must admit
I owe a lot to you
I came here from America
To find Seoul City Sue
someday I'll take her "back with
And "buy her perfumes too
So people can't "be singing
"Here comes Seoul City Sue."
LOOK AT THE EARS ON HIM
I heard they wanted men to fight as aviators hold
So I went down, held up ny hand, and this is what the told
"You111 go the Kelly Field and learn to navigate the sky"
When I got there I was SOL for this is how I fly
Chorus: Look at the ears on him, on him
OhJ how do you get that way
That was the greeting I received as I marched in today
First they put me into the kitchen, KP was my name
I wrote my girl that I was a flier
Gee J but Ifm a wonderful liar
Look at the ears on him, on him
OhJ How do you get that way
That is the only battle cry I hear both night and day
If Ifm to fight in this great war and end the Kaisers reign
They!d better take up me kettles and pans
And give me an* aeroplane
Ifve peeled a million spuds since I!ve been in this flying game
I*ve swung a pick and shovel, till my weary back 1$ lame
Ifve navigated lots of ground but not an inch of sky
And when I ask about aeroplanes, I hear the same old cry
53

FIGHTER PILOTS
Oh where are no fighter pilots down in hell
Oh there are no fighter pilots down in hell
Oh the place is full of queers, navigators, bombardiers
But there are no fighter pilots don in hell
Oh there are no fighter pilots in the states
Oh there are ro fi^itcv p*lot3 in the states
They are off on for^l^n choresr making mothers out of whores
Oh there are no il£>-;Ljr pilots in the states
Oh there are no f j..^"-tc~- pilots in Japan
Oh there are r.o l.v.iiVo.? piictr in Japan
They are a"."- a-r'.-j---: \i ^^": getting shot at every day
Oh therj ara zo ll^hic:: pilot:: in Japan
Oh there c:r zc rc~'ocr pilots in the fray
Oh there r.::e ro ^r^": pilots in the fray
They are at.1., ir. V'Xt ••caring ri"bt':\. fancy clothes
Oh there are :o 1:orccr pile be in the fray
Oh the boxcar jelled life is just a fr^ce
Oh the l;*ib8r pil: *" is just a farce
The automatic pilot-o onr. reading novels in the John
Ch iho bomLor pilots life is just a farce
fyv, -«-v~ v^~-k^,* ^^-^4. n^vcr hakes a dare
~ oat» ooxaoa^ pilot never takes a dare
His gyros are uncaged, and his wooen overaged
Oh the bomber pilot never takes a dare
Oh there are no fighter pilots up in wing
Oh there are no fighter pilots up in wing
The place is full of brass, sit tins round on their fat ass
Oh there are no fighter pilots up in wing
Ch it's naughty naughty naughty but itfs nice
If you ever do it once yo*v"il do it twice
J4.-1- «rocir y0vr rspuI:al-lonr but increase the population
un it:s naughty :ic\:-3hSy rc~£hty but it's nice
Ch look at the ??3ch in the clvb
Ch look at the 39c-Lli ir the cl^b
They donfv v~-K-7. tho^ don!t nin*. 386th does everthing
Ch lock at t::r "^"th ir. the clvi
When a t-ocber Cocksy v;v.ks into our club
When a boribvr joclroy volita inl-o our club
He don*t dri-k hie? share cf su-ir* all he does is flub his dub
OH rruws r^ ll0 ^ic-H'Sa PILOTS DCSH IN HBLL
5V

FIGHTER PILOTS
Oh itfs naught, naughty, naughty, but itfs nice
Oh it18 naught, naughty, naughty, hut its nice
Itfll ruin your reputation, but increase the population
If you ever do it once you'll do it twice.
When a bomber jockey walks into onr club
When a bomber jockey walks into our club
He won't drink his share of suda
all he does in flub his dub
Oh there are no fighter pilots down in belli
Solo: We're going to burn down the outhousei
Choruse: DOOJ
But we'll build a new one
Hooray
Our town has only one bar.
BOO
One hundred feet long.
HOORAY
Our bar has only one bartender*
BOO
Our barmaids were long dresses.
BOO
Made out of cellephane.
Hooray.
You can't walk upstairs with our barmaids.
BOO
They make you run
HOORAY
You can't sleep with our barmaids
BOO
They won't let you sleep.
HOORAY
Oh it's naughty, aaughty, naughty, but it's nice
and every body does it once or twice
It's ruing the reputation and play hell with the
population but it's naughty, naughty, naughty but
it's nice.
FIGHTER PILOTS DEATH
"I know that I shall meet my fate
Somewhere amont the cluuds above
Those I fight I do not hate
Those I guard I do not lt>v? ••••••
Hbr lawt nor duty made me fight
Hor public men, nor cheering crowds
A lonely impulse of delight
Drove to this tumult in the cluds
I balance all, brought all to mind
The years to come seen waste for breath
A waste fo breath the years behind
In balance with this life, this death©
5*t-A

TOAST TO THE BLUE AHQXLS
(Tuna- This Old House)
Thi3 ole teac gonna reed revision
Tliis ole tean gonni n^9d a crew
This ole team has ihrived on gimmicks
Have you ceen our pink and flue
This ole tean has frosty tailpipes
This ole team has lo*t its charm
And the captain ?^ll rh.-* other day
My h oy s, yon'*: \ ~i v' •l. -"• > t arm
Ain't gonna rov' !... >■'..— no longer
Ain't gonna zltw :tf.:- "=?ca^. zj niore
Ain:t got ti'je :.; Z.rav'L ^hc diamond
Ain't go-*; cinr* ^. " -sr;::. jhe -:or*
Ain:t go* r.p.r** :o "io a V:::"b Ours*
Cr a plane %z I' t:.o zo..L
And we ro loov':^ for ths PIC
Who got uc ii* • h: r hole
This ole teas? car. t 11/ in weather
This ole ieiHL canH fly in rain
This ole iea^ is c£* of pints of blue
We:re called ol.~ yollo** stain
This ole ream is getting lonesome
This ole tosun haa gone astray
And re*re just fivb an~el puddy cats
Aw&itin^ ^udge^ont d&y
A" "' gonna need this team no longes
Ain:t gonna need this teaia no more
Ain!t got time to "be a tiger
Ain;t got"time to give a roar
Ain't got planes that hold together
Or the G-suit undarw3ar
But we?ve got our pretty flying suits
So we don*\; really care
TACHIKAWA, YOKOHAMA, ITAZUKB
('Jvino- Hawaiian War Chant
Taehika^r*. lolzoh^0* Itr.ssiko
Tachtkawa, Tofcc-u£ii3a: lioruk:;*
Tachffcawa - -Tckx.hu-1 - -+ .uamfce is the place
Ahr So. 'S^il.'^*.?.;: Ar.. So ^fcehaaa)
Ah. So, '(itezokx)it Ah- Sor K.JSO"
Froz^r* Cheer. V 3 che place for you my "boy
Forzen Chpaorj is c;,3 x-l-:— *cs.% you my hoy
Forzen C^oaest, Chc^u fcrcrr-s Fxovvii Chosen is the place
Ahv Sof (2"ro2ea 0hosen}j Ahc f>o£ (Chosen frozen)
Ah* So, frozen Chosen}- Ah. So, KIKPO
5$

A BOMBER FLIES 10,000 MIIES
(Tune - Sing us Another one)
Our bomber flies ten thousand miles
Our bomber flies ten thousand miles
But a bomb like a cherry
Is all it can carry-
When our bomber flies ten thousand miles
Chorus: Steady boys, steady boys
Here comes another lie
Said pilot to bomber, how slick
Finding this target's no trick
But my God how strange
We're fresh out of range
Stcap on my parachute quiak
The Air Force sure has the life grand
Wine, women and song is the plan
There's medals by baskets
For flying caskets
In the M*G-M starlet command
F-80's are certainly keen
If to daring your tendencies lean
But we want it said
We'd not be caught dead
In such an infernal machine
With out bombers the world will be shocked
At three hundred miles they've been clocked
But while dreaming up tricks
With the B-36
We've all had our heads up and locked
The X-l was cruising the blue
The pilot felt something quite new
Crist what a sensation
Where's public relations
The Legion of Merit will do
Our bomber goes ten thousand miles
We claim it but only with smiles
While crashing the barrier
We phoh, pooh, the carrier
That really goes ten thousand miles
Dh we know what we1re saying is true
We got it driectly from Stu
We love the blue yonder
But sometimes we wonder
Just who's doing what and to who
So listen young men as we say
Be careful of wings and flight pay
There's no prohibitions
On suidice missions
So come join the Air Force today
56

ONCE THEY WERE HAPPY
(Tune - Man on the Flying Trapeze)
Once they were happy, completely at ease
They flew their F-80's like a swinging1 trapeze
They looped en, they rolled em, they bounced DC-3Ts
But alas boys, their wings have been clipped
One day they approached Itazuke
Jet leader called echelon right
Mustangs at nine o'clock level
Let's see if 8th fighter will fight
The F-80's brbke left and the Mustangs broke right
I think they see us, says jet four in fright
There1 re all pullin streamers says jet number three
Let's go home, this is no place for me
The jets headed home at a hundred percent
In fact number four had the throttle stop bent
Back to Misawa, to Misawa they went
THE PRETTIEST SHIP
(1) (Leader) The prettiest ship
(AH) The prettiest ship
(Leader) Out on the line
(All) Out on the line
(Leader) The MiG-15
(All) The MiG-15
(Leader) Flies fast and fine
(All) Flies fast and fine
(Leader) The prettiest ship
(All) The prettiest ship, out on the line
The MiG-15 flies fast and fine
(2) When we go up and fly at noon
The MiG-15's leap off the moon
(3) Then they come down and pretty soon
A pissed-off tiger lowers the boom
(4) On all our planes we paint red stars
For MiG-15's that land on Mars
(5) We chase them up to forty-four
That fox eight six ain't got much more
(6) The throttle's set right at full bore
We'll never catch that little shore
(7) Then they start home and Casey calls
We're letting down no sweat at all
(8) We're coming in with thirteen chicks
Twelve Mig-15!s one fox eight six
(9) The moral of this sotry's clear
When you start home just check your rear
(10) Cause if you don't you're sure to find
A MiG-15 tucked in behind
51

flG" SUITS AND PARACHUTES
(Tune - Bell Bottom Trousers)
Once there was a barmaid, down in brewery lane
Her master was so kind to her, her mistress was the same
Along came a pilot, handsome as could be
He was the cause of all her misery-
Chorus: Singing "G" Suits and parachutes
And uniforms of blue
He'll fly a fighter
like his daddy used to do
He asked her for a pillow to rest his weary head
Se gave it to him willingly and lost her maidenhead
And she like a silly girl, thinking it no harm
Climbed in bed beside him just to keep the pilot warn
Now in the morning before the break of day
A five pound note he handed her, and this to her did say
11T ke this my darling, for all the ham I've done"
For you may have a daughter, and you may have a son
If you have a daughter, put ribbons in her hair
And if you have a son, get the bastard in the air."
Now the moral of my story as you can plainly see
Is never trust a pilot an inch above the knee
The barmaid trusted one and he went off to fly
Leaving her a daughter to help the time go by
Final Chorus: Singing "G" suits and parachutes
And uniforms of blue
She111 never fly a fighter
like her daddy used to do
INTO THE AIR
Into the air, U.S. Air Force
Into the air, pilots true
Into the air, U.S. Air Force
Keep your nose up in the blue
And when you hear the engines roaring
And the steel props start to shine
Then you can bet the U#S. Air Force
Is along the fighting line
Into the air, junior birdmen
Into the air, upside down
Into the air, junior birdmen
Get your nose up off the gound
And when you hear the great commencement
And you win your wings of tin
Y0u will know the junior birdmen
Have sent their box tops in
58

MY WILD EYED CADET
(Tune- My Wild Irish Rose)
My wild eyed Cadet, he ainft learned nothing yet
He noses her down, when close to the ground
My wild eyed Cadet
He slips in his hanks, if he lives we'll all give thanks
I hear drums beating low, and men marching slow
Behind wild eyed cadets
EIGHT BUCKS A DAT
Open up the throttle till the needle hist the peg
Eight bucks a day, eight bucks a day

^ive and roll and loop her till she's wingless as a keg
Eight bucks a day is the pay
Close the gate, lock the door
Cause we won't come back to Iangley any more
We111 land at every flying field to San Francisco Bay
Eight bucks a day is the pay
I WAHT TO GO HOME
I want to go home. I want to go home#
The gas tank is leaking, the motor is dead
The pilot is trying to stand on his haed
Take me back to the ground, I don't want to fly upside down
Oh, My, I:m too young to die
I want to go home
HAIL YOU FIGHTER PILOTS
From Pohunkus, Tennessee
Cane a bastard that wa3 me
And my father shoveled snow from off the street
Well when I was very young
He found a diamond in the dung
And he sent me here to sing this song to you
So Hailf Oh Hail, you fighter pilots
Fill your glasses full of brew
Ani v-:*r.l'"i«\v3 -rr.-:'.":«r glass ■
To the latest horses acs
In the squadrons of the yellow and the blue
THS FORMATION
Here's health to the formation leader, a jolly good fellow is he
He uses threo star navigation, and flies on Bacardi
Here18 a health to the leaders two wingmen, to the gunner within Turdle
Here's a health to the whold damn formation, we'll fly reviews in hell
59

I'VE GOT SIX* PENCE
I've got six-pence, jolly Jolly sixpence
Ifve got six-pence to last me all my life
I've got tuppence to spend, and tuppence to lend
And tuppence to send home to my wife, poor wife
No cares have I to grieve me
No pretty little girls to decieve me
I'm happy as a lark believe me
As we go rolling rolling home
Holling home, rolling home
By the light of the silvery moon
Happy is the day, when the Air Force gets its pay
As we go rolling rolling home
PASDE CALAIS
How you can send me twice a day
To the Pasde Calais
But don't send me over the Ruhr
Send me to Paris or a target in France
Any old place that I might have a chance
You c*n send me twice a day
To the Pasde Calasi
But don't send me over the Ruhr
You may think I'm wacky
But I'm only slightly flaky
Bon't send me over the Ruhr
Now the alert's on the phone
And the target's Cologne
MY God, that's on the edge of the Buhr
Send me to Bremen or old Potsdam town
Any place you can see through the flak to the ground
You can send me twice a day
To tte Pasde Calais
But don't send me over the Ruhr
For even when I'm starting
K'm planning on aborting
Don't send me over the Ruhr
ODE TO THE B-29
(Tune- Whiffenpoof S0ng)
We are fomr little fans who have lost our way, GROWR, GROWS, GROWR
We are four little fans who have gone astray, GROWR, GROWRf GROWR
One third pilot out on the left, one third pilot out. on the right
"George" is flying with all of his might, GRCWR, GROWR, GROWR
60

FERRIN TO YOUHGSTOWN
Oh they sent me down to Perrln (or Tyndal)
Oh they sent me there to train
They taught roe how to rocket
From an aeroplane
Then they sent me to youngstown
To he a tiger too
But all I getfs a bunch of shit
Form you and you and you
I saw a fighter pilot
No smile upon his face
Then * heard him mutter
I hate this f place
60-A

IP YOU PLY
If you fly an 89, Jrou oust b<? £umb deaf and blind
For your life ain't worth a dine, whatf3 your scheduled blow up tine
Chorus:
Will you go boon today, will you go boom today
Two blew up yester day, Allison ain!t here to stay
If you fly an 86, you must really get your kicks
Bouncing the all weather boys, playing with their radar toys
If you fly a 94, you will never holler more
For your lot we do not pine, itfs better than an 89
If you fly a thunder-jet, you will really have no sweat
For your life you will not pound, the clunker won't get off the ground
TOO LOOT AT ITAZUEB
Too long at Itazuke
Look just like a little gook
Eyes that slant, nose thats flat
Speak ja-oanese, "You caught a muskrat"
Me work in rice-paddy
Go Geisha house and drink sake
Me jo-jo Number One Japanese boy-san
SOKG OF THE 18TH
(Tune- Wreck of Old 97)
Itfs a long, long road from Pusan to Pyongyang
And the mountains are high and wide
If my engine quits, you can write off a mustang
Cause K!m fixing to go ever the side
Col. McBride led his boys o4 a mission
And the chinks started throwing up flak
He said, "Run em up boys, and we'll clean out our engines
And the drinks are on the last one to get back.11
Close support is a damn fine sortie
Cause you work so close to the troops
Y^u get hit twelve times bj a 20 or a 40
and your engine coughs sputters and poops
So you hit the silk and you land in a medow
And the chinks start blazing away
And a copter comes along and picks up your elbow
Registration boys will find the rest some day
It's a damn fine war and 1 love every mission
And I guess Ivm here to stay
But I'd rather shag a broad by suggestive coition
Or catch the clap in old Sante Fe*
61

FLAK IS THE NIGHT
From Eunsan to Anju, from Pyongyang to Tangdok
Wherever the red trucks go
I We been on some tough routes 9 and had me some tough bouts
But there Is one thing I Enow
The red balls will get youf theyfre worrisome things
That lead you to sing, the flak in the night
Hear the 8th a-callingf hear the 13th bawling
Dentist, oh dentist, oh bromide, oh bromide
Oh snowflake, oh give me a steer oh give me a fix
I'm lost in the night
THE DJVAEER
Oh the Invader is a very fine airplane
Constructed of steel and tin
It will do over three houndred level
The plane with the tail tind built in
Oh, why did I join the Air Force
Mother, dear Mother knew best
For here I lie in the wreckage
In bader all over my chest
THE FIGHTING 68TH
(Tune- Mactfamaras Band)
We're here to tell a story of squadron 60
Came over from Ashia to join the fighting eighth
They1 re sitting here before us, tapping up the brew
They don't belong in a fighter group, but what can Chltty do
Chorus: la da da da, What can he do
La da da da, What can he do
la da da da. What can he do
Oh they donft belong in a fighter group
But what can Chitty do
They fly their old night fighters, they take off after dark
They don't know where they're going, they1 re Just up for a lark
They never brief, they always beef, fly strictly on a hunch
Their call should be r,Bananan cause they fly in such a bunch
Tou know are also fly at night, thank &od the times are few
We often hear night fighters saying, "Moonshine, is that yout11
"Moonshine, this is feminine, this is Feminine I say
W0nlt you tell those nasty shooting Stars to land they're in our way*"
62

RAIL CUTTERS
(Tune- Cold Cold Heart)
I tried so hard, Wild 3illt to cut
That streak of railroad track
But I'd afraid that all I did
Was dodge that flying flak
I know that one is all it takes
To "blow my ass apart
Why con't I get just one rail cut
And melt your cold cold heart
MY DARING 39
(Tune- My Darling Clementine)
In the cockpit of the Cobra
Trying hard to reach the line
But alas my engine faltered
Pare thee well my 39
Chorus: Oh my darling, Oh my darling
Oh my darling 39
You are lost and gone forever
Pare thee well my 39
When you're spinning very flatly
And you've got a worried mind
That's all "brother, hit the jumpsack
Bid farewell to you 39
All the brass hats in our congress
They have signed the dotted line
They are lucky they just bought it
They don't fly the 39
MOVIN ON
When you hear the patter of tiny feet, it's the 49th in full retreat
They're movin on, they'll soon be gone
They're pushed around just long enough, they're movin on
Hear the pitter-patter of the little feet, it's the first marines in full
They're movin on, they're movin on /retreat
They're burning gas they're hauling ass, they're movin on
Hey CI you pissed off at me, What's the matter you got no VD
I'm movin on, I'll soon be gone
Honey bucket turned over in the middle of the road', I'm movin on
Mama-san movin down the track, with a 61 baby strapped on her back
She's movin on,, she'll soon be gone
If she catches GI papa-san;. Hefll be movin on
(Con't next Page)
63

MOVIN ON (Con't)
Oh here come the Commies runnin down the pass
Playin the burp gun on a gyrene's ass
He's raovin on, he's movin on
You've "been flying to high for this little ole guy
So I'm movin on
The ole houn dog was feelin fine, till he jumped in a barrel of turpentine
He's movin on, he's movin on
He crashed the gat like a P-38» but he's movin on
The old torn cat was feelin mean, till he caught his tail in a wewin
He's movin on, he's movin on /machine
He missed a stitch when he hit the ditch, but he's movin on
MY GOD HOW THE MONEY ROLLS IN
My father makes rum in the bathtub
My mother mfakes two kinds of gin
My sister makes love for a living
My God hew the money rolls in
Chorus: Rolls in, rolls in, my God how the money rolls in, rolls in
Rolls in, rolls in, my God how the money rolls in
My brother's a poor missionary
He saves little girlies from sin
He'll save you a blonde for five dollars
My God how the money rolls in
My uncle paints real frenchy postcards
My auntie she poses for him
Her costume cost nary a penny
My God how the money rolls in
I tried making all kinds of whiskey
I tried making all kinds of gin
I tried making love for a living
My God the Condition I'm in
Chorus #2: Sin,- sin sin, sin, my God the condition I'm in, I'm in
Sin, sin, sin, sin, my God how the money rolls in
My father he died in his bathtub
My mother she died of her gin
My sister she married my brother
MY GOD WHAT A MESS I AM IN
64

RING DANG DOO
When I was young and sweet sixteen
I net a girl from New Orleans
Oh she was young and pretty too
She had what you call a ring-dang-doo
A ring-dang-doo, pray what is that
Itfs round and soft like a fussy cat
It13 round and soft and split in two
That's what you call a ring-dang-doo
She took me down into the cellar
She said I was a very fine feller
She gave me wine and whiskey too
And she let me play with her ring-dang-doo
She took me up into her bed
She placed a pillow beneath my head
And then she took my hickey-floo
And placed it in her ring-dang-doo
Now six months later she began to swell
She swelled and swelled till she looked like hell
She told her ma and her father too
That I took a crack at her ring-dang-doo
Her father said you filthy whore
Yourve gone and lost your maidens lore
Pack up you hag and your nighty too
And make your living fjrom your ring-dang-doo
She went to the city to become a whore
She hung a sing upon her door
Five dollars now nothing else will doo
To take a crack at my ring-dang-doo
And the fellers came and the fellers went
And the price went down to fifteen cents
Fifteen cents and nothing else will do
To take a crack at my ring-dang-doo
And then one day a son of a bitch
He had the crabs and the jockey itch
He had the syph and diarrhea to
And he took a crack at her ring-dang-doo
They hung her tits in the city hall
They pickled her ass in alcohol
Now all you bums and hobo18 too
Tpufve heard my tale of the ring-dang-doo
So they buried her near the city hall
And they engraved upon the wall
She18 learned her lesson and you should too
Just stay away from the ring-dang-doo
65

OLD GRET BUSTLS
(Tune- Old Grey Bonnet)
Pat on your old grey bustle and get out and hustle
For tomorrow the rents coning due
Put your ass in clover let the boys look it over
If you con't get five take two
Put on those old pink panties that used to be your aunties
And we'll go for a tussel in the hay
Now there's no use duckin1 cause you're gonna get a fuckin1
In the good old fashio*" ed way
Put on your old grey corset if it won't fit force it
For the fleet is coming in today
As the bees make honey let your ass make money
In the good old fashioned way
Put on that old Kue ointment the crabs dissapointment
And we'll kill those bastards where they lay
Though it scratches and it itches it will kill those sons of bitches
In the good old fashioned way
MACH RIDERS IN THE SET
(Tune- Ghost Riders In the Sky)
An 86 got airborne on a dark and windy day
And as he raised his landing gear, you could her the pilot pray
Keep all those buckets in the wheel and I'll be safe and sound
Don't let that fire go out, Dear Lord, till I am on the ground
Chorus: Yippi-i-o, yippi-i-a-a-a
Mach riders in the sky
Those flyin fiends are here to stay, it's said they're very mean
And all know we've been famous since 1917
Though we may work on holidays, and weekends just the dame
Those pukin' pups make history, Oh bless that famous name
As our 86's leave the ground, their tails are spouting flame
The pilots they all go through hell, but fly im just the same
The crew chiefs work their asses off to keep em flyin high
And watch with satisfaction as their plane goes screaming by
Day and night our pilots fight to live up to their name
Other pilots come and go, but ours fly on to fame
They're going to fly forever in that range up there on high
The cuss and cry, "Live or die," MACH RIDERS IN THE SKI
66

THE THING
I've flown around for many a year, from Berlin to laegu
But never a thing I saq like the thing, crlising along the Yalu
I was tooling up and down one dayf with nary a thought on my mind
When suddenly was this???* right up my behind
When suddenly was this???f right up my behind
I dropped my tanks and "broke to the right, called help to my wingman
He took on look at the ???. and £6 turned' around and ran
And then I called on another guy, known as Maple Red
But when her saw that ???. he ducked his nose and fled
But when he saw that ???. he ducked his nose and fled
And then there was this other bird, who yelled ge altitude
There may be more of those ???, and I!*e ldsVnfr' fortitude"
Chen finally came this swept-wing thing, one of the famous fourth
He said I'll get that ???. his fifties spattered forth
He said I'll get that ?H, his fifties spattered forth
And then I looked around again, and much to my surprise
I saw him clobber the ???. right before my eyes
The MIG blew up went down in flames, his comrades followed suit
Because of the guy in the ???. who knew just when to shoot
Because of the guy in the 77?. who knew just when to shoot
Now all you jockeys of eighty-fours, here's my advise to you
Never go cruising up and down, north of Sinanju
Unless you've got the Famous Fourth, hovering over you
Cause they'll take care of the ???. they know just what to do
Cause they'll take care of the ???. they know just what to do
THOSE WEDDING BELLS ARE BREAKING UP
Not a soul down on the corner
It's a pretty certain sign
Those wedding bells are breaking up
That old gang of mine
All the boys are singing love songs
They've forgot Sweet Adeline
Those wedding bells are breaking up
That old gang of mine
There goes Jack, there goes Jill
Down through lovers lane
Now and then, we meet again
But they don't seem the same
Gee I get that lonesome feeling
When I hear those church bells chime
ftieose weeding bells are breaking up
That old gang of mine
67

DOODLE- LEE-DOO
Please sing to me that sweet melody
Called Doodle-lee-doo, doodle-lee-doo
I like the reat "but the part I like best
Is doodle-lee-doo, doodle-lee-doo
Simplest thing, there isn!t much to it
All you got to do is doodle-lee-doo it
I love it so, wherever I go
I doodle-lee-doodle-lee-doo
Two litlie lovers, under the covers
What111 they do, doodle-lee-doo
I would cugges'; that they should undress
And doodle-lee-doo, doodle-lee-doo
Cherries are red, ready for plucking
I'm sixteen and I'm ready for highschool
I love i'j so, wherever I go
I doodle* •r.ee-doodle-lee-doo
Please do to me wha\, you did to marie
last Saturday ni^ht, Saturday night
It must have 1ee~ real, cause I heard Marie squeal
Last Saturday night, Saturday night
Don't know what: what you were doin
Somebody said you were doodle-lee-dooin
I love ::z cof wherever I go
I doodle-lee-doodle-lee-doo
Miss Emma Snow uent out on a show
Called doodle-]^3-doo, doodle-lee-doo
She mac?e a hit just playing her hit
In doodle-lee-doo, doodle-lee-doo
Twenty four hours, that's all tiiere was to it
How in this world did she doodle-lee-doo it
Got a Rolls Royce, hut not hy her voiie
But doo&le-lee-doodle-lee-doo
BALL OF TARN
Twas a sunny day in June all the flowere were in bloom
The birds were singing gaily on the farm
When I spied a maiden fair and I said unto her there
Let me wind up your little ball of yarn
She satd sir can!t you see youfre a stranger to me
But follow me out behind the barn
There's a shady little nook beside the babbling brook
Where you can wind up ny little ball of yarn
How young man take my advice never stay out late at night
And you'll never lose your cherry or you charm
Be like the bluebird and the robin keep your little P from bobbin'
And you'll never wind up that little ball of yarn
68

SING US MOTHER ONE
There was a young nan from Boston
Who traded his car for an Austin
There was room for his ass and a gallon of gas
But his "balls hung out and he lost em
Chorus: That was a very fine song
Sing us another one
Just like the other one
Sing -us another one, do
There was a young man from Dundee
Who "buggered an ape in a tree
The result wa3 most horrid, all ass and no forehead
Three halls and a purple goatee
There was a young man from Kildair
Who "buggered his girl on the stairs
The bannister "broke, he doubled his stroke
And finished her off in mid air
There was a young queer from Khartuom
Who took a young lesbian to his room
They argued all night, as to who had the right
To do what, with which, and to whome
There was a professor from the Mall
Who possessed a cylindrical ball
The cube root of its weight, plus his penis, plus eight
Was one half of two thirds of fuck all
There was a young girl from St Paul
Who wore a newspaper dress to a ball
Her dress caught on fire, and burned her entire
Front page, sports section and all
There was a young lady from Wheeling
Who had a peculiar feeling
She laid on her back, and tickled her crack
And pissed all over the ceiling
There was a young man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it
He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin
If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it
There once was a young man from Kent
Whose dick was so long that it bent
To save himself trouble, he put in in double
And instead of coming, he went
There once vas a man of class
Whose balls were made of brass
When they sv/ung together, they played stormy weather
And lightening shot out of his ass
69

SING US ANOTHER ONE DO (Con't)
There was a young man from Sparta
Who was the worlds champion farter
On the strength of one bean, he played God Save the Queen
And Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata
There once was a man from Rangoon
Who was born by the light of the moon
He had not the luck, to be born by a fuck
But was a wet dream scooped up in a spoon
There mice was a boy from Baclaridge
And he was his parents disparage
He sucked off his brother, and went down on his mother
And ate up his sisters miscarrage
There once v/as a pilot from Z-2
Who buggered a girl down in Taegu
He said to the Doc, as i» she handed him his cock
Will I lose both my testicles too
There once was a man from Trieste
Who loved his wife with a zest
Despite all her howls, he sucked out her howles
And desposited the mess on her breast
In the gardeii of Eden sat Adam
With Ms hand on the butt of his madam
He chuckled with mirth, for the knew on this earth
There were only two balls and he had em
There was an old hermit named Dave
Who kept a dead whore in his cave
He said I'll admit, I'm a bit of a shit
But think of the money I save
There once ftas a girl from France
Who boarded a train by chance
The engineer fucked her, and so'd the conductor
And the breakman went off in his pants
There once was a girl r*ned Alice
Who used a dynamite stick for a fallice
They found her vagina, in south Carolina*
And a piece of her fcymen in Dallas
There once was a man from Bombay
Who fashioned a cunt out of clay
The heat of his prick, turned the clay into brick
And rubbed all his foreskin away
There once was a girl named Gail
Between her tits was the price of her tall
And on her behind, for the sake of the blind
Was the same information in braile
70

SING US ANOTHER ONE DO (Conrt)
There once was a girl from the Azores
Whose cunt was all covered with sores
The dogs in the street, would not eat the green meat
That hung in festoons from her drawers
There was a young girl from Peru

^ho said as the Bishop withdrew
The Vicar is quicker, he's also a licker
And considerably thicker than you
There was a young priest from Dundee
Who went in tb3 garden to pee
He said Pax Wo Biccum, I can't make the piss come
I gv„03s I've got CLAP
There was a young girl named Myrtle
Who was rapad on the "beach by a turtle
The results 01' the fuck, was two eggs and a duck
Which proved that the turtle was fertile
There wa: a young r^nn from Nottingham
Who stood on the bridge at Buckingham
Jus4- watnhing the stunts, of the cunts and the punts
And the tricks of the pricks that were fukingham
An Argentine Gaucho named Bruno
Said fucking is one thing I do know
All women are fine, and sheep are devine
But llamas are ncmero uno
There was a young man from ^ew Brighton
Who said my dear you've a tight one
Said v.he pon my soul, you have the worng hole
1-5 's the one up in front that's the right one
There was a man from St ^ames
Who played most unusual games
He lit a match, to his grandmother snatch
And laughed as she pissed through the flames
There onee was a man named McGruder
Who wooed a nude in Bermuda
Now the nude thaught it. crude, to be wooed in the nude
But McGruder was cruder, he screwed her
There v/as a young man from Kieth
Who skined back pricks with his teeth
It wasn't for pleasure, he adopted this measure
But for the cheeso he found underneath
There was a young la3s named Alice
Who peed in the Archbishops chalice
It was not from relief, as the the belief
But purely from prodestant malice
71

SING US ANOTHER ONE DO (C0nft)
There was a young "bishop from Birmingham
Who diddled the nuns while confirmen1 oM
He "brought them indoors, slipped down their drawers
And slipped his Episcopal worm in fem
There was a young man from Brock
Who tied a violin string to his cock
With just one erection, he could play a selection
From Johann Sebastian Bach
There was a young lady from Bansom
Who had it three times in a hansom
When she cried for more, a woice from the floor
Cried my name is Simpson, not Sampson
?2

WEST VIRGINIA HILLS
In the hills of West Virginia, lives a girl named ^ancy Brown
Ain't never seen such beauty, in city or in town
Now Nancy and the Deacon climbed the mountain come high noon
And when they reached the summit, it was very very soon
Oh she came rollin down the mountain, rollin down the mountain
Rollin down the mountain by the dam
And in spite of all his urgin, she remained the local virgin
And is just as pure as wert Virginia ham
Now along came a trapper, Henderson by name
He took our little ^ancy. and the story's just the same
She c^mo rcllin down the mountain rollin down the mountain
Rollin down the mountain by the shack
And in spile : his urgin, she remained the local virgin
And is jur* ae pure as Pappy1 s applejack
3ift along caizo a dicker, with his hundred dollar bills
He took a\v? little nancy, a way up in the hills
And then she stayed up in the mountains, stayed up in the mountains
Stayed up in the mountains all that night
She cane home next morning early, more a woman than a girlie
And her pappy kicked the hussy out of sight
How che's livin in the city, livin in the city
Oh she?3 livin in the city mighty swell
She!s done away with pots and kittles, and she's eatin fancy vittles
And thoso West Virginia hills can go to hell
But along came depression, took slicker by the pants
He had to sell his packard, had to give up little Nancy
So now sne's back in West Virginia, back in West Virginia
Back in tfest Virginia as a yore
And the Deacon and the trapper, get that thing that they were after
And She's known as the West Virginia LADY
PISS ON_______
Let!3 all go dov'n and piss on the________
Piss on the______., piss on the _______
Let's all go down and pisn on the _______
Till they float away
Till they float away
Till they float away
Let18 all go down and piss on the_______
Piss on the______7 piss on the________
Let's all go dotfr. and piss on the
Till they float away
/
73

LILLI FROM PICCADILLY
Oh, I took a trip to london to look around the town
When I got to Piccadilly, the sun was going down
I've never seen such darkness, the night was black as pitch
When suddenly, in front of me, I thought I saw a witch
Chorus: 0hf it was Idlly, for Piccadilly
You know the one I mean, the one I mean
Ifll spend each payday, that's my hey hey day
With Lilly, my "blackout queen
Ch, I couldn't see her figure, I couldn't see her face
But if I ever meet her, I'll know her anyplace
I couldn*t tell if she were blonde or a dark brunette
But gosh oh gee, did she give me, a thrill I won't forget
She said to me, Oh Yankee boy are you lonesome are you blue
Just step around the corner, I'll show you what I'll do
We went up some dark alley, I said, I love you kid
She said, Ckay. but first you pay, so I gave her twenty quid
She leaned her back against the wallr I took her in my arms
She gave to me her very all, and all her buxum charms
I lost my head, I lost my heart, I even lost my hat
It was a shame, she should have been, a circus acrobat
We went to her apr.rtment, and when we were in bed
She was so very pleasant, I said some day we'd wed
She even gave me breakfast, she was so very nice
Why what she did for twenty quid was sheap at half the price
FALSIES IN BRASSEIRES
There's nothing can be better than a girl that wears a sweater
Though she may not be as big as she appears
They've got an awful lot of fllsies in brasseires
Her pullmonary muscles may resemble Janie Russels
And She'll say she got that way form drinking beers
They've got an awful lot for falsies in brasseires
So round----so firm----and so fully packed
You'll find it's really just an act
Give a girl a Bally bra and she will grow—grow—grow
Now I've made a careful study with the help of my best buddy
And a hundred thousand women volunteers
They've got an awful lot of fJlsies in brasseires
So fellows before you wed her, please investigate her sweater
Or you'll find your honeymoon will end in tears
They've got an awful lot of falsies in brasseires
7**

LYDIA PINEAM
Chorus: 0hf we sing, we sing, we sing, of Lydia Pinkham, Pinkham,
And her love for the human race
A wonderful compound, a dollar a bottle
And every label bears her face
N0w Mrs, Murphy, had husband trouble, she did not like to fiddle-de-dee
But after taking a bottle of compound, they had to tie her to a tree
Now Mrs, Murphy, had baby trouble, she could not have a baby dear
But she took, a bottle of compound, now she has then twice a year
Mow Mrs, Murphy, had titty trouble, to feed her baby, she knew not how
But after taking abottle of compound, they had to milk her like a cow
Now Mrs, Mjrphy, had kedney trouble, in the morning, she could not pee
But after taking a bottle of compound, they had to pipe her out to sea
FRIGGING IN TK2 RIGGING
Twas on tho good ship Venus, my God you should have seen us
The figure head was a whore in bed, and the mast a rampant penis
Chorus: Frigging in the rigging, frigging in the rigging
Frigging in the rigging, therefs fuck all else to do
The captain of this lugger, he was a dirty bugger
He wasn't fit to shovel shit, from one place to another
The first mate's name was Morgan, my God was he a gorgon
Ten times a day he used to play, upon his sexual organ
The second mates name was Andy, he i*as so young and randy
They boiled his bun in steaming rum, for coming in the brandy
The Midshipmans name was Nipper, he was a dirty ripper
He filled his ass with broken glass, and circumsized the skipper
The captains wife was Mable, when ever she was able
She'd fornicated with the second mate, upon the galley table
The. captain had a daughter, who fell into the water
Delighted squeals revealed the eels, had found her sexual quarter
The crew they were hard cases, you could see it in their faces
They took to frigging in the rigging, for want of better places
So drunk with exultation, we reached our China station
And sunk a junk in a sea of spunk, caused by mutual masterbation
75

OLD GREEN RIVER
I was floating down that old Green River
On the good ship rock and rye
But I floated too far
Got stuck on a bar
Out there alone, wishing that I were home
The ship went down with the captain and crew
It left me only one thing to do
I had to drink that old green river dry
To get back hone to you
VIOLATE ME
Violate me in the violet time
In the vilest way that you know
To the best things in life
I am utterly oblivious
Give me a life that is lewd and lascivious
Violate me in the violet time
In the vilest way that you know
Ravage me, savage me
Utterly damage me
On me no mercy bestow
Wiolate me in the violet time
In the vilest way that you know
THE WOODPECKER
(Tune- Dixie)
Oh, I stuck my finger in a woodpeckers hole
-And the woodpecker said god bless your soul
Take it out, take it out, take it out, remove it
So, I removed my finger from the woodpeckers hole
And the woodpecker said God bless my soul
Put it back, put it back, -out it back, replace it
I replaced my finger in the woodpeckers hole
The wood pecker said God bless my soul
Turn it around, turn it around, turnet around, revolve it
I revolved my finger in the woodpeckers hole
And the woodpecker said Gol bless my soul
In- and-out, ?-v-and-out, in-and-out, recriprocate it
I recriprocated my finger in the voodpeckers hole
And the woodpecker asid God bless my soul
Pull it out, pull it out, pull it outt retract it
I retracted my finger from the woodpeckers hole
-And the woodpecker said God bless my soul
Take a smell, take a smell, take a smell, revolting
76

ROLL YOUR LEG OVER
Oh, if all little girls were like fish in the ocean
And I were a whale I would teach the emotion
Chorus: Oh roll your leg over, Oh roll your leg over
Oh roll your leg over the man in the noon
Ohf if all little girls were like bells in the tower
And I were a clamper I!d bang by the hour
0hf if all little girls were like fish in the river
And I were a sandbar I'd ccro £.:ke them quiver
Oh, if all little girls were like sheep in the pasture
And I were a ram I'd make them run faster
Ch, if all little girls were like little wlite rabbits
And I were a hare I would teach them bad habits
Oh, if all little girls were like little red vixens
And I were a fox I surely would fix 'em
Oh, if all little girls were like Hedy Lamarr
I'd try twice as hard and get twice as far
Oh, if all little girls were like cows in the clover
And I were a bull I would case them all over
Oh, if all little girls were like little white flowers
And I was a bee I would buzz them for hours
Oh, if all littles girls were like little white chickens
And I was a rooster I'd give then the dickens
Oh, if all little girls were like little ole turtles
And I was a turtle I'd get in their girdles
Oh, if all little girls were lika Gypsy Rose ^ee
And I were her G-String Oh boy what I'd see
Oh, if all little girls were like nurses who would
And I were a doctor I would if I could
Oh, if all little girls were like bricks in a r>ile
And I were a mason I'd lay them in style
Oh, I wish that all girls were like fish in a pool
And I were a chap with a waterproof tool
77

OH IT'S BEER BEER BEER
Oh itfs beer, beer, beer,
That makes you want to cheer
In the Corns, in the Corps
Oh it's beer, beer, beer,
That makes you want to cheer
In the US Air, U0S0 Air Force
Chorus: My eyes are dim, I cannot see
I have not brought my s^ecs with me
V/hishey-* That make2 you feel so friskey
Gin- That makes you want to sin
Vodka- That makes you feel you oughta
Sautern- That makes your belly burn
Vermouth- That makes you feel uncouth
Bourbon- That makes you feel like chirp in
Wine- ^hat makes you feel so fine
Rum- That makes you feel so &umb
Rye- That makes you feel so sly
Brandy*- That makes you feel so dandy
Likker- That makes you ever sicker
Sherry- That makes you feel so hairy
THE B-36
The B-36 flies at 40,000 feet, The B-36 flies at 40,000 feet
The B-36 flies at 40,000 feet,
But it only carries on little teensie weensie bomb
Tons and tons of ammunition, tons and tons of ammunition
Tons and tons of ammunition,
But it only carries one little teensie weensie bomb
THE PRETTIEST GIRL I EVER SAW
The prettiest girl I ever saw
Was sipping bourbon through a straw
The prettiest girl I ever saw
Was sipping bourbon through a straw
And now and then the straw would slip
And K'd sip bourbon through her lips
And now I've got a mother in law
From sipping bourbon thror~h a straw
The moral of this story's clear
Don't sip a bourbon, sip a beer
78

KIMPO SONATA
Oh I was sent to Nellis, I was sent to train
I learned how to boob and strafe, from and aeroplane
Oh I was sent to Kimpo, to be a killer too
But all I git is a bunch of shit from you and you and you
I knew a fighter pilot, no smile upon his face
And many's the time I h eard him say
I HATE THIS FUCKING PLACE
OH THE 335TH IS A VERY FINE SQUADRON
(Tune- Old 9?)
Ohe the j?5th is a very fine squadron
Their pilots are all true blue
But they bring back drawere that smell like dogshit
From the dog-fights at old Sinanju
ODE TO THE JOC DUTY OFFICER
You ought to be dead you eld bastard
You ought to be damned well shot
Y0u ought to be tied to the door of k shit house
And left ther to damned well rot
I've sat in this damn cockp8t for hours and hours
I've stuck it as long as I could
I've stuck it and stuck itt so now * say fuck it
My ass hole's not made out of wood
lOZEoHB FUGITIVES
Eyes right, assholes tight, foreskins to the front
We're the boys who make no noise, we're always chasing cunt
We are the fliers of the ni^at, wefd rather fuck than fight
We are the foreskin fugitives
ICE ON THE RICE
When he ice is on the rice in olu Tsuiki
And the saki in the cellare atarts to freeze
When you turn to her and say, "My darling dozo"
Then you're turning just a skoshi Nipponese
THE BALLS OF O'LEARY
(Tune- The Bells of St Mary)
The balls of O'leary
Are wrinkled and weary
Are battered and tattered
Like the dome of St Paul
The people all muster to see that great cluster
Of the wonderful pair of O'Leary's balls
79

OF THE MISERY OF LIVIHG IN SIN
CHORUS
Oh the misery of livin in sin
If you keep on flyin, you're bound to spin in
If down fedela road you travel too far
Bln.ck Dragon You'll meet death at the Bar
Why I went over on PCS
To live in Morocco is anyones quess
To live in Morocco is anyones quess
Little did I know that life in Maroc
Could ruin a red bollded healthy hot rock
Chorus
I went to ITedela on bright sunny day
7i3re were boucoup Fatimas to take all my pay
I "nicked out a dead one and gave her a go
Doc Brossi, Doc Brossi, Please say it ain't so.
Chorus
There were small ones and tall ones, and fat ones and thin ones
they washed it, kissed it, and then stuffed it in
They suck you, they fuck you, tie you nuts in a knot
If the vino doesn't kell you, you'll die of the rot.
Chorus
While sit tin on five, you have fuck all to do
no Bogiest no strangers to shoot at for you
Don't sit with your thucb up your ass where it stinks
Call Randall for pidgeons direct to the Sphinx
Chorus
When the cob gets so hard that you can!t force a pee
Don't sweat it Black Dragons, just listen to me
Go Down to Pedela with three mill on hand
Thirty minutes in heaven will wilt any man
79-A

THE BASTARD KING OF ENGLAND
Oh minstrels sing of a mighty king
Who ~ :ay long years ago
Ruled his land with an iron hand
But his mind was weak and low
His only under clothing was
A filthy undershirt
It was long enough to hide his hide
But never to hide the dirt
He loved to hunt the royal stag
Within the royal ucod
But the sport he loved the best of all
Was pulling the royal pud
Wild and wolly and fall of fleas
Lis terr;Vble tool I g down to his knees
God save the "bastard king of England
Now the q*;oon of Spain was a sprightly dame
And an rmcrous da^ae was she
And she loved to fool with the royal tool
From far acroos the sea
So she cent a special message
l»y a special messenger
And asked the royal bastardship
To spend the night with her
When Pnillip of France heard this
He summoned his royal court
Said she prefers my rival
Just "because my tool is short
So he sent the Duke of Slip and Slap
To give the qv.een a dose of clap
And thus avenged the bastard king of England
When news of this foul deed
Did re*-a fair England^ halls
The king he s'-zore "by the shirt he wore
He'd have old Fhillip's balls
So he offered a night with the sweet Hortense
To the man *\o fd nub the king of France
And thu3 avoage the bastard king of England
1%) spoke the duke of Sr.ffold
He took himself to France
Declared himself a flutter
The king took io\m his pants
He dropped a thong aroung his dong
Jumped on his horso and galloped along
And thus avenge* the bastard king of England
80

THE BASTARD KING OF ENGLAND (Con!t)
Now Phillip assumed a royal stance
And ^roveler? on the floor
For duting the ride his royal pride
Had stretched a yard or more
And all the ?:irls in England
Came down to London town
And shouted around the castle
To hell with Englands crown
So Phillip assumed the throne
His sceptes was the royal "bone
With which he downed the bastard king of England
ASS HOLES ARE CHE.iP TODAY
Ass holes are cheap today
Cheaper than yesterday
Little boys cost half a crown
Standing up or lying down
Larger boys cost seven and six
Cause they take bigger pricks
Ass holes are cheap
Are cheap today
THREE WHORES FROM CANADA JUNCTION
Three whores walked down from Canada Junction
Full of brandy and wine
The topic of conversation was
Your cunts no bigger than mine
Chorus: Roly poly tickle my holey
Slippery slimey slue
Rattle your nuts across my guts
I'm one of the whorey crew
The first old whore got up and said
My cunt's as big as the air
The birds fly in and birds fly out
And never touch a hair
The second old whore got up and said
^cunt's as big as the moon
A man went in in January
and didn't come out till June
The third old whore got up and said
Man you're all talking balls
Cause when.I have my period
It's like Niagra Falls
81

SALOME
Down oui* street, we had a merry party
Everybody there was oh so gay and hearty
Talk about a treet, we ate all the meat
And we drank all the beer
In the boozer down the street
There was aid Uncle Joe, fair fucked up
We locked him in the cellar with the old bull pup
Little sonny Jim, tried to get it in
With his ass hole winking at the moon
Ch, Salome f Salome
Your should see Salome
Standing there, with her ass all bare
Waiting for someone to slide it in there
To slide it, and glide it
Hight up her f' -king chute
Two brass balls and a prick of steel
And a foreskin, full of shit
She's a big fat cow, twice the size of me
Hairs on her belly like the branches of a tree
She can jump fight fuck
Wheel a barrow push a truck
lhat!s my girl Salome
On Monday night, she takes it up the back
On Tuesday night, she takes in all the slack
On Wednesday night, she had a spell
On Thursday night, she fucks like hell
On Friday night, she takes it up her nose
In between her fingers and down between her toes
On Saturday night, she dishes out gams
And she goes to church on Sunday
She just wants me for a sunbeam
And a fucking fine sunbeam I!ll be
GOING HOME
(Tune - Out On the Texas Plains)
I!m gonna head my ship into the wide blue sea
With my nose into the West
I'm gonna find a gal that was made for me
I*m gonna give her all my best
I!m gonna head my ship toward that old West coast
Hound Long Beach and L.A.
And when we all get home we will drink a toast
To those long forgotten days
I'm gonna fly all day, Ifm gonna fly all night
Toward that setting sun
Add when that good coast line looms into sight
My work has just begun
(C0n!t)
82

GOING HOME (Conft)
I'M gonna find a gal that just don't give a darn
IfM gonna love her night and day
'• -I if she says no no I'm gonna twist her arm
uause I'm gonna get my way
I'm gonna drink myself into a total wreck
I'm gonna love until I die
I got a pilots mind and a flyer's rep
I couldn't he good if I tried
So won't you £ust relax
?or there is one more verse of the things I'm gonna do
I know that times are bad, hut they coule be worse
So here's my parting wor5 to you
I'll ne'er forget thie war until the day I die
Cause it's changed my life's flight plan
And when my days are o!er and my time draws nigh
"'- -"-^ - a die drunk if I can
RIO BIO RIO
Chorus: Rio, Rio, Rio, Rio, Jesus christ how I feel
Fresh from a shore house, prick full of steel
Thats my organ grinder
Laid her in her fathers hail
Spread her ass from hall to hall
Shoved it up into her gall
With my old organ grinder
Fucked her in her fathers bed
Shoved it up into her head
Fur-1, -chat girl till she was dead
With my old organ grinder
Followed her to the burial ground
Just to go another round
Fucked her as they lowered her down
With my old organ grinder
Some folks say I am a knt~e
Say that I do not behave
Cause I jacked off on her grave
With my old organ grinder
OH MY GOD
Oh my God, we've all done wrong
We!ve all been drunk for so GOD DAMN long
And we don't give a Jesus if it rains, hails or freezes
Let the old man say what he GOD DAMN pleases
We're just a bunch of 'shitsters, a bunch of booze histers
FIGHTER PILOTS ALL
83

IN FLIGHT REFUELING
(Tune - Strawberry Rhone)
Oh come fighter pilots, both young and old
And I'll tell you a story, that'll make you turn cold
A story of tankers, and a flight out to sea
And I hate to tell you what they did to me
Oh we took off from George, oh so early one morn
The weather was balmy, but not really warm
We soon left the coast line, and headed tc sea
And for the last time land I did see
vh we flew on for hours, it seemed like more
We flew and we flew, till my butt it got sore
And wwe finally got to that point far from land
Where there were supposed to be tankers at hand
But yes, you have guessed it, no one was there
Nothing around, but ocean and air
We called and we called, but it was in vain
There was nobody out there to refuel my plane
Ch wj circled and circled, and hollered for gas
The pain was bigninig, to leave my ass
!Twas be^ining to pucker, and turn a dull hue
When finally a tanker came into view
Well bygones were bygones, and we didn't bitch
We just latched onto, that sonofabitch
What ho, called the scanner, "It's under your wing
If you don't hook up, you likely will ding.1"
Well I stabbed and I stabbed, and I stabbed some more
But I couldn't hit, that dirty old whore
I looked at my gas gauge, and it was down low
I backed off again, and tried it real slow
So I tried it real slow boys, but that didn't work
So I tried again fast, what a hell of a jerk
The funnel it hit me, one hell of a blow
As I looked at the cold water down there below
I looked at that water, so cold and so chilled
Add I thought to myself, I'll soon be killed
So I'd better hook up, and taka on some fuel
Cause that water below looks uncomfortably cool
So I finally did it, I hit that damn hose
I hit that old funnel, rights square on the nose
The engineer said, "Sir, your taking on fuel"
But the bastard was lying, the dirty old fool
I called that damn scanner, said, "Turn on the gas
I can't wait much longer, or I'll bust my ass."
He looked ux> from his paper, and said with a grin
"You know there are days sir, when you gust canft win"
(Cont next page) 84

IN PLIGHT REFUELING (ConH)
That's the end of my storyf I'm sorry to say
That old F-100, lies out in the bay
But I'll have my ven^ence, you can bet your life
Cause there's one tanker pilot, that I'm gonna knife
I LOVE OLD WING CPS AND PLYING SAFETY
(Tune-Dear Hearts and Gentle Pedple)
I Love old Wing Ops, and Flying Safety
Ther're nothing but hot air
But if you bust one, and hit the barrier
You:: know damn well that they'll be there
I read my dash one, from dawn till sunset
But it don't go so well
For when the board meets, and I go up there
I know they're going to give me hell
I feel so helpless, each time I try to fly
For I know they'll watch each move I make
And so it's Wing Ops, and ^lying Safety
Watching every rule I break
SHOW ME THE WAY TO GO HOME
Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
I had a little drink about an hour ago
And it went right to my head
Wherever I may roam
Cj land or dea or f$unz
You will always hear me singing this song
Show ne the way to go home
Indicate the way to my abode
I'm fatigued and want to retire
I had a spot of beverage sixty minutes ago
And it went right to my cerebelluim
Wherever I may perambulate
On land or sea or atmoshperic vapor
You can always hear me crooning this melody
Indicate the way to my abode
BUDDY
BUDDY, BUDDY, have a good time
Stay in bed till ftalf past nine
Drink your drink and flub your dub
86th Fighter Country Club
85

LEE'S HOOCH IE
(Tune-On Top of Old Sraokey)
I went to Seoul Bity, and net a Miss Lee
Se gaid for a 9hort tine, oh cone sleep with ne
We went to Lee's hoochie, A room with hot floors
I left my 9hoes outside, and slid shut the door
She took off her long Johns, and rolled out the pad
I gave her ton thousand, !,twas all that I had
Her breath smelles of kinchie, her bosoms were flat
No hair on her pussy, now what about that
I asked to go ben jo, she led ne outside
I reached for old snokey, he crawled back inside
I rushed to the medics, cried, "What shall I do"
The doc was dunfounded, old snokey was blue
Now when you're in Seoul City, on your next three day pass
Don't go to Lees Hoochie, sit flat on your ass
Now your ass nay get blistered, and Lee nay tempt you
But better the red ass, that old snokey blue
COCAINE SUE
Oh morphine Bill and Cocaine Sue
Truckin' down the avenue
Chorus: Oh honey have a sniff, have a sniff on ne
Honey have a sniff on me
Now right on Broadway, left on main
To get a shot of old cocaine
Now in that drugstore hung a sign
V/e ain't got no more morphine
In a graveyard on a hill
Lies the remains of Morphine Bill
And in that graveyard by his side
Lie the remains of his cocaine bride
Now the moral of this story just goes to show
There ain't no fun in sniffin' snow
HONEY
Oh, Honey, Honey, Bless your heart
Cause you're the honey that I love so well
tfy heart beats true, sweetheart for you
Cause you're the honey that I love so well
86

THE COED AND THE CADET
The Coed and the Cadet were courting I declare
Down by the gate they didnft know that I was there
Oh the Coed she was bashful and the Cadet he was shy
He asked her if he could and this was her reply
Tou can do it if you wanna
But you'd better do it right
You'd better not do it
Like you did the other night
Cause if you do, I'm telling you
I111 never let you do it again
I really mean it
I'll never let you kiss me again
A MAN WITHOUT A WOMAN
A nan without a woman
Is like a chip without a sail
Is like a boat without a rudder
Like a kite without a tail
A man without a woman
Is like a shipwreck on the sand
But if there's one thing worse in the universe
It's a woman without a man
For you can roll a silver dollar
Cross the bar room floor
And it will roll, because it's round
And a woman never knows what a good man she's got
Until she turns him down
So hom.y listen, now honey listen to me
I want you to understand
That a silver dollar goes from hand to hand
While a woman goes from man to
RED SCARFS
(Tune-Strawberry Blonde)
Now the 12th lighter Squadron they donft show me much
While the Red scarfs fly
Their technique is bad and their boiabing is sad
While the Red Scarfs fly
Their guns are corroded, their pilots are loaded
Their cockpits are covered with dust
They fly for awhile, tut they ainft got no styjbe
While the Red Scarfs fly
87

THE CHEETAS
Oh it is easy to see it's not the roosters
For the roosters only crow
And it is easy to see it's not the cobras
For the cobra never put on such a wonderful show
Oh it is easy to see it's not the foxes
For the foxes are too few
Oh it's easy to see, who else could it be
But the Cheetas, every time
DO YOU KNOW MY SISTER TILLY
Do you know my sister Tilly
She's a whore on Piccadilly
Add my mother is the same upon the strand
Arid my father sells his ass hole
At the Elephant and Castle
We're the finest whoring family in the land
When you wake up in the morning
With your hands upon your knees
Add the shadow of your penis on the wall
And the hair a-growing thick
Between your ass hole and your prick
And the rats are playing snooker with your balls
MUSTANG'S RUN BY MERLIN
Mustang18 run by Merlin, and Merlinfs run by me
I am run by(Sq CO), and he can climb a tree
Oh we'll all hang old (Sq CO) to the top of a plele
And we'll all be home by Christmas
In a pigs ass hole
(Sq CO) is run by (Wg CO), and (Wg CO) run by (AD CO)
(AD CO) run by (AF CO), and (AF CO) knows where he can go
Oh we'll hang old (AF CO) to the top of the pile
And we'll all be home by Christmas
In a pigs ass hole
THE CANDLE SONG
All the nice girls love a candle
Cause a candle has a wick
And there's something about a candle
That reminds them of a prick
Nice and greasy, slips in easy
It's the maidens pride and joy
You can hear them sing and shout
As they pop it in and out
Ship Ahoy, Ship Ahoy*
88

(Tune-Thanks for the Memories)
Arigato for the memories
Of train wrecks on the line
Of G-inza marts and honey carts
Arigato, so much
Arigato for the memories
Of steaks we couldn't eat
Old left over meat
Of powdered milk and girls in silk
Kimonas on the street
Arigato, so much
F^w are the times we've feasted
And manyfs the time we've fasted
R and R's were swell while they lasted
We didn't have fun, and no harm done
So Arigato for the memories
Of special Allied cars
All the different bars
Of whiskey cokes and dirty jokes
And undeserved D.R.'s
Arigato, so much
Arigato for the memories
Of dead fish on the shore
Nats bechid the door
The Kamakura 3uha and brocades that we all wore
Arigato so much
Arigato for the memories
Of snacks at the PZ
All those talks on sex
The broken bones we suffered, in Takusan jeepo wrecks
Arigato so much
We say hello with martini's
We'll say sayonara with saki
The Japs won't forget all that kbaki
Honshu's not the same, but we're glad we came
Arigato so much
Arigato for the memories
Of lanterns after dark
Rickshaws in the park
The funny names, the baseball games!
We really left out mark
So Arigato, so much
89

AURALEE
As the blackbirds in the spring
Neath the willow tree
Sat a piped the song they sang
Singing Auralee
Auralee—Auralee—Maid with the golden hair
Sunshine came along with thee
And shadows in your hair
TELL ME WHY
Tell me why,. the ivy twines
Tell me why,. the stars do shine
Tell me why, the ocean's blue
I'll tell you why, it's because I love you
Because God made, the ivy twine
Because God made, the stars to shine
Because God made, the oceans blue
Because God made you, is why I love you
BATTLE HYMN
(Tune-Battle Hymn of the Republic)
We fly our fucking Sabres at 10,000 fucking feet
We fly our fucking Sabres through the rain and snow and sleet
And thougfa we think we're flying south
We're flying fucking north
And we make our fucking landfall on the firth of fucking forth
Chorus: Glory, glory halleluia, Glory« Glory, Halleluia
Glory, Glory, Halleluia, (Insert last line each verse)
We fly those fucking Sabres at fuck all 1,000 feet
We fly those fucking Sabres through the trees and corn and wheat
And though we think we fly with skill
We fly with fucking luck
But we donH give a fucking damn or oare a fucfclng fuck
We fly those fucking Sabres at 10,000 feet
We fly those fucking Sabres through the rain and snow and sleet
And though we think we're flying up
We're flying fucking down
And we bust our fucking asses when we hit the fucking ground,
90

SPANISH GUITAR
Oh the first pjrrt of call it was Aden, Aden
Where the girls wouldn't screw, but we made fem, Mgde 'em
Chorus: Three dollars you pay, for a bang u^ each way
And a tune on a Spanish Guitar plink, plink, plink
Singing Hi-ziggy-ziggy, fuck a little piggy sideways
"v'ish, Swish
Mr idea of a woman is a big fat whore
Shit-bang, luck-stick
Three dollars you pay, for a b^n£ tro each way
And a tune on a Spanish Guitar plink, plink, plink
Oh the next "oort of call it was Boston:, Boston
Where the girls wouldn't screw, but we forced 'em, forced 'em
Ch the next port of call it was Malta, Malta
Where the girls would'nt, but ought fat oughtfa
Ch the next port of call it was Suwon, Suwon
Where the firls they would do it for two won, two won
TALL GRASS
In the tall tall grass
Young Mary lay a-sleeping
When out of the tall grass
A pilot same a-creeping
With his Idng dingle dangle dingling
Right down to his knee
Three months have gone by
Young Mary she grew bolder
She wished that the pilot
Would come and do it over
With his long dingle dingle dangling
Right down to his knee
Six months have gone by
And Mary she grew fatter
The neighbors did wonder
Just who had been at her
With his long dingle dangle dingling
Right down to his knee
Nine months have gone by
And Mary burst asunder
And out jumped a pilot
With his 6?th number
With his skoshe dangle dingle dangling
Right down to his knee
91

THE MAID OF THE MOUNTAIN
The maid of the mountain
She pisses like a little fountain
Cause the hairs on her dickie-d^-doo
Hang down to her knees
One black one, one white one
And one with a little shit on
Cause the hairs on her dickie-di-doo
Hang down to her knees
I've been there, I've seen it
I've been right "between it
Cause t e hairs on her dickie-di-doo
Hang down to her knees
I've smelt it, I've felt it
And it feels just like velvet
Cause the hairs on her dickie-di-doo
Hang down to her knees
I've tangled, I've dangled
I've fucking near got strangled
Cause the hairs on her dickie-di-doo
Han/7 down to her knees
BYE BYE 3LACK3IRD
(Tune-Bye Bye Blackbird)
There was a man, he was no good
He took a girlie in the wood
He flies mustangs
Then he took off all her clothes
And her shoes, and herhose
He flies Mustangs
He took her where nobody else could find her
Took a string and tied her hands bechid her
Walked away and began to sing
Began to sing, ting-a-ling
Mustangs, I fly
SEPBSQA
(Don't ask me what it means, I don't know either)
Oh, I loved her and I kissed her in the moonlight
And the moon shone bright all day
Oh, I loved her and I kissed her in the moonlight
Anc* the moon shone bright all day
Gol darn that moon
92

MINNIE THB WteKAJD
Many1 s the night I spent with Minnie the M**^14
Down at the bottom of the sea
Minnie lost her morals, down there among *hQ corals
Gee, but she was mighty nice to oe
Now's many's the night with the pale moon shining
Down on her seaweed bungalow
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust
Two twin beds and only one of them mussed
Now you can eaiily see, she's not my mother
Because my mother's forty nine
And you can easily see, she's not my sister
Because I wouldn't show my sister
such a hell-uv-a good time
And you can easily see, she's not my sweetheart
Because my sweetheart's to refined
She's just a peach of a kid
She never knew what she did
She's just a personal friend of mine
TWO LADIES '/ERE CONFIDING
(Tune- River Shannon Slows)
Two ladies were confiding
Cn a streetcar where they were riding
Oh they must have been school teachers
Thetr conversation ran that way
One said, How many children have you
She replied, I've thirty thank you
And when the same was asked the other
She said Iv*ve thirty two
An old, Irish lady, seated across the aisle
Said I heard your conversation
And I greet you with a smile
You must have been grand ladies
To have had so many babies
But your husbands must have come from
Where our River Shannon flows
MOTHER HUMPERS BALL
(Tune- Barktown Strutters Ball)
Oh there's gonna be a ball at the Mother Humpers Hall
The witches and the bitches gonna be there all
Now honey don't be late, cause they're passin out pussy, bout half
Now I've humped in Prance and I've humped in Spain /past eitht
I've even been humped on the coast of Maine
But the best piece I ever saw
Was when I humped my mother in law
Last Saturday night at the Mother Humpers Ball
93

GLORIOUS
Now the first thing they prayed for
They prayed for their king
Glorious, glorious, glorious king
If he have one son, may he also have ten
May he have a fuckin army, cried the airmen Amen
Chonus: Now the Squadron Leader and the Wing Commander
And the Group Captain too
Hands in their pockets with fuck all to do
Robbing the pay of the poor Acey-Due
May the lord shit you sideways
Cried the airmen fuck you
Now the next thing they prayed for
They prayed for their Queen
Glorious, glorious, glorious Queen
If ahe have one daughter, may she also have ten
May ¥8 have a fuckin harem, pried the Airmen Amen
Now the next thing they prayed for
They prayed for their beer
Glorious, glorious, glorious, geer
If we have one beer, may we also have ten
May we have a fuckin brewery, ciied the airmen Amen
DRUNK
Drunk last ni^ht, duunk the night before
Gonna get drunk tonight, as Ifve never been dtrunk before
Cause when Ifm drunk, I'm as happy as can be
Cause I am a member of the souse family
Now the souse family is the best family
That ever came over from Old Germany
There fs the Highland Dutch, and the lowland Dutch
The Rotterdam Dutch add the Goddamn Dutch
Siging Glorious, Glorious
One keg of beer for the four of us
Glory be to God that there are no more of us
For one of us could drink it all alone, Damn Near
Heref8 to the Irish, , dead drunk--------The lucky stiffs
HARRIGAN
H--A, double R—I, G--A—N spells Harrigan
Sure I'm proud of all the Irish that's in me
And. a, devil a man can say a word agin' me
H~A, double R—It G—A—JJ, you see
That*8 a name to which no shame ha* ever
been connected with Harrigan, that's me
9*

KEYHOLE IN THE DOOR
I left the canteen early, it was shortly after nine
And by a stroke of fortune, her room was next to mine
Like any brave "Colombo" with regions to explore
I took up ny position by the keyhole in the door
CHORUS:
Oh, the keyhole in the door, oh, the keyhole in the door
I took up my position by the keyhole in the door.
She crossed over to the fireplace her lovely figure to warm
Vtith only a silken nightly to hide her gorgeous form
I prayed t lat she would take it off, just that and nothing more,
By God, I saw her do it throught the keyhole in the door.
That after many a pounding upon that paneled door
And after many a pleading, I crossed that threshold floor
So no one would over see what I had seen before
I hung her silken nighty over the keyhole in the door.
That night I slipt in clover and other things besides
And on that snow-white bosom I had a wonderful time
I awoke next morning early, my back it was sore
You'd think ITd been crawling through the keyhole in the door*
WHIFFENPOOF SONG
To the tables down at Maury's
To the place where Louie dwells,
To the dear old Temple Bar we loved so well
Sit the Whiffenpoofs assembled
VJith their glasses raised on high,
And the magic of their singing casts a spell,
Yes, the magic of their singing
Of the songs we love so well,
"Shall I wasting" and Mavourneen" and the rest,
We will serenade our Louie,
While Life and voices shall last,
And in passing be forgotten with the rest.
We are poor little lambs who have lost our way,
Baa, baa, baa.
We are little black sheep who have gone astray,
Baa,baa,baa.
Gentlemen songsters off on a spree,
Dammed from here to eternity.
God have mercy on such as we,
Baa,baa,baa.
95

LAST NIGHT
(Tune, Finicule-Finecula)
Last night I stayed up late to masturbate.
If felt so good—I knew it would
last night I stayed up late to beat my meat.
It felt so nice—I did it twice.
You should really see ne on the short strokes;
It feels so grand, I use my hand.
You must really catch me on the long strokes;
It feels so neat, I use my feet*
Shake it, break it, beat it on the fio&r;
Smash it, bash it, thrust it through the door;
Some people seen to think that fucking1s grand,
But for all around enjoyment I prefer to use my hand.
SIXTEEN TIMES
(Tune, "Sixteen tons")
Some people say a man is maSe out of fear,
But a fighter pilot's made out of whiskey and b~er—-
Whiskey and beer, rum and gin
If you fly the dot you!re sure to spin in.
CHORUS:
You fly sixteen times, what d' you get,
Anoth.r day older and your weapon is bent-
Col. Donalson don't you call me, I'm weak and lame
I lost my ass in a poker game.
I awoke one morning when the sun didn't shine,
Got my 'chute and went down to the line---
Down to the line to fly the "D"
But it was raining so hard I couldn't see.
I scrambled one morning with blood in ny eye,
I'd had my fill of Overholt Rye---
Shot.sixteen holes in a T-33
They're going to hang my ass from a coconut tree.
When you see me coming better break to the right
'Cause the 26th Fighter had a party last night—
Vty eyeballs are red an' I'm mean as a bear,
Believe me SAMAP better clear the air.
96

LEADER OF THE GROUP
Oh, My nane is Col Sweat and
Ifia the leader of the group
Come into Operations and
I'll give you all the poop
I!ll show you where the enenies at
and where the flak is black
For Ifn the last one off the ground
And I'n the first one back,
Early aborts, Avoid the rush
69A

I USED TO WORK IN CHICAGO
I used to vork in Chicago, in a department store
I used to work in Chicago, I did but I don't any more
A lady came in, she asked for a hat
I asked her vJ^at kind"*she. adored
Felt she said, and felt her I did
I did but I don't any more
CaJke - Layer Glue - Paste Food - Pet
Lamp - Floor Cream - Massage Razor - Injector
Birds - Love Girdle - Rubber Scafr - Neck
IT'S TRAGIC
You smile your teeth fall out, your hair smells like sauerkraut
It's Tragic
The bugs desert the air, and rush to nestle in your hair
It's Tragic
It takes one look to know you have no chains
Youfre just a bag of bones with long surrounding arms
Your eyes are big and round
There's one that's blue and one that's brown
It!s Tragic
You part your hair in place
And it keeps sliding down your face
It's Tragic
And as I tell myself
These things that happen are not really true
Yet in my heart I know the tragedy is really you
INTO THE AIR 69EPS
Into the air 69ers,
Into the air upside down,
Into the air 69ers*
Set your sights and let!s go down, we!ll all go down.
And when we see those bastard commies,
And we make then shit a pound*
You can bet those 69ers,
Aer all going down*
Into the air 69ers
Onto your back,, soixante-neuf"
We'll blast those MTG's, 69ers.
And watch their ass go Poof, Poof, Poof*
And when you see those, Golf-balls" flying •
And the flak begins to blast*
You can bet the 69ers
Will bite "em inthe ass*
97

HORSE SHIT
THERE WAS A PILOT OF GREAT RENOWN,
THERE WAS A PILOT OF GREAT RENOWN,
THERE WAS A PILOT OF GREAT RENOWN,
UNTIL HE FUCKED A GIRL GROM OUR TOWN-
FUCKED A GIRL FRCii OUR TOWN—
HA HA HA, HO HO HO, HORSE SHIT.
HE LAID HER IN A FEATHER BED,
HE LAID HER IN A FEATHER BED, HE LAID HER IN A FEATHER BED,
AND-TKEN-HE TWISTED OUT HER MAIDERHEAD,
TWISTED OUT HER liAIDEHKEAD—
HA HA HA, HO HO HO, HORSE SHIT.
HE LAID HER ON A WINDING STAIR,
HE LAID HER ON A WlilPING STAIR,
HE LAID HER ON A WINDING STAIR,
AND-THEN-HE SHOVED IT CLEAR UP TO THERE-
SHOVED IT IN CLEAR UP TO THERE—
HA Hfl HA, HO HO HO, HORSE SHIT
HE LAID HER DOWN BESIDE A STUMP,
HE LAID HER DOWN BESIDE A STUMP,
HE LAID HER DOWN BESIDE A STUMP,
AND-THEN-HE MISSED HER CUNT AND SPLIT THE STUMP,
MISSED HER C NT AND SPLIT THE STUMP—
HA HA HA, HO HO HO, HORSE SHIT.
HE LAID HER DOWN BESIDE A POND,
HE LAID HER DOWN BESIDE A POND,
HE LAID HER DOWN BESIDE A POND,
AND-THEN-HE FUCKED HER WITH HIS MAGIC WAND,
FUCKED HER WITH HIS MAGIC WAND—
HA HA HA, HO HO HO, HORSE SHIT.
HE LAID HER ON THE SEWEY GRASS,
HE LAID HER ON THE DEWEY GRASS,
HE LAID HER ON THE DEWEY GRASS,
AND-THEN-HE SHOVED THE OLD BOY UP HER ASS,
SHOVED THE OLD BOY UP HER ASS,
HA HA HA, HO HO HO, HORSE SHIT.
THE TOOK HER TO THE COUNTRYSIDE,
HE TOOK HER TO THE COUNTRYSIDE,
HE TOOK HER TO T E ,COUNTRYSIDE,
AND-THEN-HE FUCKED THE GIRL UNTIL SHE DIED,
FUCKED THE GIEL UNTIL SHE DIED,
HA HA HA, HO HO HO, HORSE SHIT.
HE TOOK HER TO THE BURIAL GROUND,
HE TOOK HER TO THE BURIAL GROUND,
HE TOOK HER TO THE BURIAL GROUUND,
AND-THEN-HE THOUGHT HE'D HAVE ANOTHER ROUND,
THOUGHT HE'D HAVE ANOTHER ROUND,
HA HA HA, HO HO HO, -------HORSE SHIT, HORSE SHIT.
98

FOGGY, FOGGY DEW
OH, I AM A BACHELOR, I LIVE ALL ALONE.
I WORK AT THE WEAVER'S TRADE
AND THE ONLY, ONLY T ING THAT I EVER DID WRONG,
WAS TO WOO A FAIR YOUNG MAID.
I WOOED HER IN THE SUMMER TIME
PART OF THE WINTER TOO.
AND THE ONLY, ONLY THING THAT I EVER DID WRONG
WAS TO SHIELD HER FROM THE FOGGY, FOGGY DEW.
ONE NIGHT SHE CAME TO MY BEDSIDE
AS I LAY FAST ASLEEP.
THIS PRETTY, PRETTY MAID
KNELT BY MI BEDSIDE
AMD THER SHE BEGAN TO VEEP.
SHE—WEPT, SHE CRIEB
SHE DAMN NEAR DIED
ALASS, WHAT COULD I DO.
SO I TOOK HER INTO BED
AND COVERED UP HER HEAD
JUST TO SHIELD HER FROM THE FOGGY, FOGGY DEW.
NOW A YEAR HAS GONE BY
STILI. A BACHELOR AM I.
AND I WORK AT THE WEAVER'S TRADE
COMES A—KNOCKING AT MY DOOR
IT'S VOICE I'VE HEARD BEFORE.
'TIS THE VOICE OF THE FAIR YOUNG MAID.
SHE—HANDED ME A LITTLE ONE
SHE SAID,,WHAT CM I DO."
SO I TOOK HIM INTO BED
JUST TO COVER UP HIS HEAD
JUST TO SHIELD HIM FROM THE FOGGY, FOGGY DEW.
NOW I AM A BACHELOR, I LIVE WITH MY SON.
WE WORK AT THE WEAVER'S TRADE
AND EVERY, EVERY TIME THAT I LOOK INTO HIS EYES,
HE REMINDS ME OF THE FAIR YOUNG MAID.
HE REMINDS ME OF THE '.-.'INTER TIME, PART OF THE SUMMER TOO.
OF THE MANY, MANY TIMES THAT I GAZED INTO HER EYES
AND TO SHIELD HER FROM THE FOGGY, FOGGY DEW.
LITTLE RED LIGHT
(Tune, "My Blue Heaven")
A TURN TO THE RIGHT, A LITTLE RED LIGHT, WILL LEAD YOU TO MY RED HAVEN
YOU'LL SEE A SMILING FACE ON A^PILLOWCASE, A FORM DIVINE.
JUST A LITTLE OLD WHORE WHO'S EEEN-SCREWED BEFORE,
A THOUSARD TIMES.
JUST MOLLY AND ME, THERE'LL NEVER BE THREE.
WE'RE CAREFUL IN OUR RED HAVEN.
99

DO YOUR BALLS HANG LOW
(Tube- March of the Toy Soldiers)
DO YOUR 3ALLS HANG LOW, DO THEY SWING TO 2ND FRO
CAN YOU TI3 THEM IN I KNOT CAN YOU TIB «EM IN A BOW
CAN YOU THROW THEM O'VER YOU SHOULDER LIKE A EUROPEAN SOLDIER
DO YOUR 3ALLS HANG LOW
IN DAYS OP OLD '/HEN KNIGHTS VERS BOLD
THEY SHIT RIGHT IN THEIR BRITCE^S,
THEY WIPED THEIR ASS WITH BROFT-aJ GLASS
THOSE TOUGHT OLD SONS OP BITCHES
IN DAYS OP OLD WHEN KIGHTS VERE BOLD
AND WOM.JJ WORE MERE TRIFLES
THEY HUNG THEIR BALLS UPON THE WALLS
AITO SHOT THEM DOWN WITH RIFLES
IN DAYS OP OLD WHEN KIGHTS WERE 30LD
AND WOMEN WEREN'T PARTICULAR
THEY BINDED TEM UP AGAINST THE WALL
AND FUCKED THEM PERPENDICULaR
IN DAYS OF OLD WHEN KIGHTS WERE BOLD
THEY WORE A LEATHER BRITCHES
THEY BEaT THEIR PRICKS WITH HICKORY STICKS
AND YELLED LIKE SONS OF BITCHES.
VIRGIN STURGEON
(Tune, Puben Puben, I've been thinking)
CAVIAR COMES FROM A VIRGIN STURGEON
WIRGIN STURGEON IS A VERY PINE FISH
VIRGIN STURGEON NEEDS NO URGIN«
THAT'S WHY CAVIAR IS MY DISH
SHAD ROE COMES FROM A SCARLET SHAD FISH
SHAD PISH HAVE A VERY SAD PATS
PREGANT SHAD FISH IS A SAD FISH
GOT THAT WAY WITHOUT A MATE
OSTTERS THEY ARE FISHY BIVALVES
THEY HAVE YOUNGSTERS IN THEIR SHELL
HOW THEY DIDDLE IS A RIDDLE
BUT THEY DO SO WHAT THE HELL
THE GREEN SEE TURTLE'S MATE IS HAPPY
WITH HER LOVERS WINNING WAYS
FIRST HE GRIPS HSR WITH HIS FLIPPER
THEN HE FLIPS AND GRIPS FOR DAYS
MRS CLAM IS OPTIMISTIC
SHOOTS HER EGGS OUT IN THE SEA
HOPES HER SUITOR IS A SHOOTER
HITS THE SELFSHMB SPOT AS SHE (Con't Next Page)
100

VIRGIN STURGEON (Con't)
GI3E A THOUGHT TO THE HAPPY CODFISH
ALWAYS THERE WHEN DUTY CALLS
FEMALE COD FISH IS AH ODD FISH
FROM HER COME YOUR COD FISH 3ALLS
THE TROUT IS JUST A LITTLE SALMON
JUST HALF GROAN -iND MINUS SCALES
BUT THE TROUT, JUST LIKE THE SALMON
Ciffl'T GET ON WITHOUT HIS TAIL
LUCKIEST FISH ARE THE COMMON STARFISH
WHEN FOR OFFSPRING TOY ESSAY
YES MY HEARTHS THEY HAVE PARTIES
IN THE GOOD OLD FASHIONED WAY
I FED CAVIAR TO MY GIRL FRIEDN
SHE WAS A VIRGIN TRKD AND TRUE
NOW THAT VIRGIN NEEDS N URGIN
THERE AIN'T NOTHIN' SHE WON'T DO
I FED CAVIAR TO MY GRANDPA
HE WAS A MAN OF NINETY THREE
SCREAMS AND SHRIEKS WERE HEARD FROM GRANDMA
HE HAD CHASED HER UP A TREE
I FED CAVIAR TO MY GRANDMA
SHE CiJO! DOWN OUT OF TH3T TREE
NOW MY GRANDMa AND MY GRANDPA
START TO RAISE A F.MILY
I FED SOME C .VIAR TO MY ROOSTER
I FED SOME CAVIAR TO MY COW
NOW THE BARNYARD SURE LOOKS FUNNY
ALL THE COWS HAVE FEATHERS NOV
JOIN THE AIR FORCE
Chorus:
OH, WHY DID I JOUN THE AIR FORCE
MOTHER, DEAR MOTHER KNEW BEST.
HERE I LIS BENEATHE A WRECKAGE
A SABREJET OVER MY CHEST.
NOW WHEN YOU ARE OUT ON A MISSION
A MIG 15 MAKES A FINE PASS
REACH OVER SQUEEZE BOTH OF THOSE HANDLES
THE HELL WITH THE SHIP SAVE YOUR ASS*.
101

PILOT'S HEAVEN
(Tune, Ghost Riders in the Bky)
AS WE "WERE PLYING THROUGH THE SKY
ONE BRIGHT AND SUNNY DAY,
WE SPIED A BIG BLACK THUNDERSTORM
ALYING IN OUR WAY
FLY RIGHT ON THROUGH, THE COLONEL SAID
WE DO MOST ANYTHING
AND HNOW WE'RE UP IN HEAVEN
AND HEAR THE ANGELS SING.
OH IT'S SO VERY NICE U? HERE
AWAY UP IN THE SKY
THERE NO ONE HERE WITH HEN-HOUSE WAYS
THERE IS NO TBY
THE FOOD IS GOOD, THE CO'S SWEEL
WE HUVE NO NEED TO FEAR,
THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS OCS--
WE ALL WEAR WINGS UP HERE
AS MS LOOKED DOWN ON EARTH ONE DAY
WE SAW A GRUESOME SIGHT
IT MADE OUR BLOOD RUN V1RY COLD
IT TURNED OUR LIVEES WHITE,
THE WHOLE COMMAND FROM OMAHA
WAS HEADED UP THIS WAY
WE CALLED OUR LORD BEFORE US
AND ALL KNELT DOWN TO PRAY
THE GENERAL TOLD OUR BOSS, THE LORD
NOW THIS IS NOT A PRANK
HE SHOUTED IN A MIGHT VOICE
JUST WHAT'S YOUR DATE OF RANK
THE LORD SAT 'jHERE--HIS HEAD WAS BOWED,
THE GENERAL SHOUTED CLEAR,
THERE'S JUST NOT ROOM IN H3AVEN
FOR TWO CO'S UP HERE
THE LOFD HE CALLED US 'FORE JHE THRONE
AND THESE LAST WORDS HE SAID,
YOUR TOUR UP HERE IS DONE, MY BOYS
YOUR MIGHT AS WELL BE DEAD,
WE'LL SEND YOU OUT ON PCS
BUT NAMSS »iE C.JJNOT TELL
ONE HALF TO GO THREE NING 0 SIX,
THE OTHER HALF TO H-E-L-L
102

BANG IT INTO LULU
Some girls work in factories
Some girls work in stores
Ify girl works in a knockin1 shop
With forty other whores
Chorus: Bang it into Lulu
Bang it good and strong
What111 we do for banging
TTien Lulu's dead and gon
Wish I was a Pis spot
Under Lulu's bed
Every time she stooped to pee
I'd see her maidenhead
Wish I was a finger
On Lulu's little hand
Every time she wiped her ass
I'd see the promised land
Lulu had a baby
She had it on a rock
She couldn't call it Lulu
'Cause the bastard had a cock
Lulu had a ba>y
She named it Sonny Jim
She threw it in the pisspot
To teach it how to Bwin
Last time I saw Lulji
I havn't seen her since
She was suckin' off a tiger
Through a barbed wire fence
IN THE SPRINGTIME
In the springtime, in the springtime
In the springtime of yors
I met a young lady who looked like a mmmmmmmm
Darling young maiden, as she lay in the grass
And gently rolled over and showed me her
Diamonds and bracelets and little pet duck
And told me she'd teach me a new way to _______
Bring up my children and te ch them a knit
While farmers in barnyards were shoveling out
Feed for their horses and cattle apd sheep
In the springtime, in the springtime
In the springtime so Bweet
10?

TiDS COMKBS LAMENT
(Tune- Clementine)
Once a flier, do or dierf in his faithful Sabre true
After bitchin, flew a mission, to the town of Sinanju
Still in flight he, saw some mighty, Rissian MIG's upon his tail
With a quiver, and a shiver, he let out an awful wail
Chorus: Sayonara, Sayonara, Sayonara, Ah so Des
If. you find me* never mind me
I will be an awful mess
Then a Hustang, went in busting, Just to see what he could do
But alas, he made a pass and that was all, they got him too
Hiought an 80 I!m so great he'll never get a shot at me
Wasnft gone long when his swan song
Sounded just like this to me
Then a Thunder Jet who hadnft blundered yet
Thought he'd try it all alone
Like a blotter hit the water, shook the and of Davey Jones
So the tally in MIG alley isn't quite like all the claims
But as a fair course to the Air Force
We won't mention any names
OLD HUMBiJa NIHB
Twas a dark and stormy night, not a star was in sight
All the Mustangs were tied down to the line
When in rain up to his ears, stood a lonely volunteer
With his orders to fly old number nine
H4s ass was racked with pain as he climbed into his plane
And his bung hole was puckered fit to tie
And he whispered a prayer as he clumbed into the air
For he knew that *v.is was his night to die
As he flew" o'er Ha-^-ru he cold see a school or two
And the women and children very well
But how vr^.s he to know that he'd fly so Goddamned low
That his bomb blast would blow his ass to hell
In the wreck he was found thinly spread out on the ground
And the crunchies they raised his Weary head
With his life almost spent here's the message that he sent
To his buddies who'd be sad to see him dead
I used an 8 to 10 delay but it didn't work out that way
Without a tail a F4U won't fly
Tell the Skipper for me, that he now has twenty three
He can roll up the ladder----Semper Fi
104

SAM HOUSTOH
A big "black bull came down from the mountain
Huston, Sam Houston
A big black bull came down from the mountain
Long time ago
Long time a *o o o o, L0ng time ago o o o
A big black bull came down from the mountain
Long time ago
He spied a heifer in the pasture grazin
Houston, Sam Houston
He spied a heifer in the pasture grazin
Long time ago
Long time ago o o o, long time ago o o o
He spied a heifer in the pasture grazin
Lon^; time ago
He yunped the fenee and he yumped that heifer
Houston, Sam Houston
He youmped that fence and he yumped that heifer
Long time ago
Long time ago o o of Long time ago o o o
He yumped that fence and he youmped the heifer
Long time ago
He missed that heifer and pffft in the pasture
Houston, Ssm Houston
He missed that heifer and pfft in the pasture
Long time ago
Long time ago o o o, Long time ago o o o
He missed that heifer and pffft in the pasture
Long time ago
The big black bull went back to the mountain
Exhausted, exhausted
The big black bull went back to the mountain
Long time ago
Long time ago o o o, Long time ago o o o
The big black bull went back to the mountain
Long time ago
COOL
I'm as cool as the tip of an eskimo's tool
I'm as cool as a fish in a frozen pool
Coll as a pane of frosty glass
Cool as the fringe around a polar bears ass
Cool
105

I AIN'T GOT NO USB FOR THE WOMEN
I AIN'T GOT NO USE FOR THE WOMEN:
A TRUE ONE CAN NEVER BE FOUND
THEY'LL USE A MAN FOR HIS MONEY
tJHBN IT'S GONE, THEY'LL TURN HIM DOWN
THEY'RE ALL ALIKE AT THE BOTTOM
SELFISH, AND GRASPING FOR ALL
THEY'LL STICK BY A MAN WHEN HE'S WINNING
AND LAUGH IN HIS FACE AT HIS FALL
I ONCE KNEW a YOUNG CAW PUNCHES
HONEST AND U? RIGHT AND SQUARE
BUT HE TURNED TO A HARD SHOOTIN GUNMAN
AND A WOMAN PUT HIM THERE
HE FELLIN WITH EVIL COMPANIONS
THE KIND THAT ARE BE2TER OFF DEAD
WHEN A GAM3LER INSULTED HER PICTURE
HE FILLED HIM FULL OF LEAD
ALL THRU THAT LONG NIGHT THEY CASED HIM
THRU MESqUITE AND TALL CHAPARRAL
AND I COULDN'T HELP THINK OF HER PICTURE
WHEN I SAW HIM PITCH JiSB FALL
IF SHE'D BEEN THE PAL SHE SHOULD HAVE
HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN RAISING A SON
INSTEAD OF OUT OF THE PRAIRIE
TO DIE BY A RANGERS GUN
DEATH'S SHARP STING DID NOT TROUBLE
HIS CHANCES FOR EIFE WERE. TO SLIM
BUT WHERE THEY WERE PUTTING^HIS BODY
WaS ALL THAT WORRIED HIM
HE LIFTED HIS HEAD ON HIS ELBOW
THE BLOOD FROM HIS WOUND RAN RED
HE LOOKED AT HIS PiLS GROUPED AROUND HIM
AND THIS IS WHAT HE SAID
BURY ME OUT ON THE PRAIRIE
WHERE THE COYOTES HOWL OVER MY GRAVE
3URY ME OUT ON THE PRAIRIE
BUT FROM THEM MY BONES PLEASE &1HE
WRAP ME UP IN MY BLANKET
AND BUXT ME DEEP IN TH3 GROUND
COVER ME OVER WITH BOULDERS OF GRANITE, HUGE iJQ) ROUND
SO VI BURIED HIM OUT ON THE PRAIRIE
WHERE THE CO'OTES THEY HO..L O'ER BIS GRAVE
AND HIS SOUL IS NOW A RESTING EROM T HE UNKIND CUT SHE GAVE
AND MANY ANOTHER YOUNG PUNCHER,
AS HE RIDES PAST THBT PILE OF STONES
RECALLS, OF SIMILAR WOMAN
AND THINKS OF HIS MOULDERIN BONES
106

hinky di
Up in Korea midst hight rocks and snow
Ilhe r>oor Chinese C0mmie is felling quite low
For as the Corsairs roar by overhead
He knows that his buddies all soon will be dead
Chorus: Hinky dl Dinky Dinky di
Hinky di Dinky Dinky di
Lin Pao went way up to cold Kato Hi
His prize Chinese army in action to see
He got there a half hour after the U's
And all that he found was their hats and their shoes
Run little chink men save your ass run
For 323 is out looking for fun
As the big white nosed Corsairs came down in their dives
YOU111 know the deathrattlors are after your lives
Uncle Joe Stalin your stooges h?ve found
It just doesnft pay to invade foreign ground
For when they disturbed the severe morning calm
They brought on the rockets, bombs and napalm
Here's to the 2-C, the vought people too
And their well known product the blue F*fU
To all gyrene pilots and carriers at sea
And to the deathrattlers squadron ol' 323
Ve fought at jfyong Yang and at Hagaru
At Kumb wa and Kaesang and Qyangbu
So here's to our pilots and here's to our crew
The target, the snake, and the blue FW
TEN THOUSAND DOLLAHS
(Tune- Old 97)
He was comin1 on the downwind 80in1 one ninety per
When his Hundred went into a spin
He was found in the wreck with his hand on the throttle
And his body all covered with gin
Now the Pratt man said, "It can't be the engine
'Cause that engine never chugs*"
So ur>on examination, pulling blades in every station
They found it was the jet mix sludge
Chorus: (Low and Soft) (Tune-Funeral March)
Ten thousand dollars going; home to the floks
Ten thousand dollars going home to the folks
Oh won't they be excited, Oh won't they be delighted
Just think of what they can buy
Ten thousand dollars going home to the folks
107

TIE MY HOOT AROUND A THEE
(Tune- Chi sola Trail)
Reached In my pocket, pulled out n penny
She said boy your con't h^ve any
Chorus: C0me and tie iny root round a tree, round a tree
Cooe and tie my root around a tree
Reaohdd in my pocket, pulled out a nickel
She said for that you don't even get a tickle
Reached in ay socket, pulled out a dime
She said young man you're wasting your time
Reached in my pocket, pulled out a quarter
She said young man l'-*'-\ preachers daughter
Reached in my pocket, pulled out a half
She said young man you make me laugh
Reached in my pocket, pulled out six bits
All she did was wiggle her tits
Reached in my pocket, pulled out a buck
he said young man you've bought a fuck
Took her to the kitchen, laid her on the sink
Oh my &od how her pussy did stink
Fucked her sittin1 fucked her lyin1
If I'd had wings I'd a fucked her flyin1
I awoke in the morning, and quess what I saw
Fifteen chancers and a big blue ball
I went to a doctor, cause my pecker was sore
My God said the doctor you've been taken by a whore
And now you can see, I'm a peckerless man
I fuck em with my finger and fool em when I can
Now the last time I saw her, and I haven't seen her since
She was jacking off a doggie through a barbed wire fence
I Saw HER SNATCH
I saw her "snatch" her stchel from the window
I held her for a moment in the rain
I kissed her "as" she hurried to the station
To see her brother "Jack off" on the train
108

CREEPING AND CRAWLING
One night as I was crawling and creeping, creeping, creeping
I spied a young maiden so peacefully sleeping
So roll your leg over, so roll your leg over, over more
I said to her can I come to bed with you
A nd then she replied you're not handcuffed or tied
So roll your leg over, so roll your leg over, over more
Her drawers were tight and I could not get in then
And then she replied there's a knife on the table
The knife was sharp and her drawers split asunder
And then we were banging like lightening and thunder
So roll your leg over, so roll your leg over, over more
In about nine nonths lay the poor maid asunder
And then she remembered the lightning and thunder
So roll your leg over, so roll your leg over, over more
HUMORESQUE
Passengers will please refrain
From flushing toilets while the train
Is standing in the station, I.love you
As we go strolling through the park
And goosing shadows in the dark
If Shermans horse can take it, why can't you
You're the guy that did the pushing
Put the wet spots on the cushion
Poot prints on the dash board upside down
Ever since you met my daughter
She's had trouble passing water
Wish that you had never come to town
I'm the guy htat did the pushing
Put the wet spots on the cushion
Poot prints on the dash board upside down
Since I met your daughter Venus
I've had trouble with my penis
Wich I'd never seen your God damn town
I LOVE A BILLBOARD
I love a billboard, I always will
A sexy billboard gave me, my first thrill
When I was only a little child
A sexy billboard drove me wild.
109

THE HAIRY CHESTED EIGHT SIX
We1 re fron the light Six
The hairy chested Eight Six
Whenever we go out and have a ball
We take delight in stirring up a fight
And knocking hawks and tigers in the head
Till they1re dead
HA. HA; HA
HO- HO, HO
HEE, HEE, HEE
We have gotten
A rep for being rotten
We put poison in our CO's Cream of '.Jheat
We1re from the eight six
The hairy chested eight six
And we eat (ROAR) Raw Meat!
(Call the waiter - More Beer)
PADDY MURPHY
Have you ever been in an Irishmans shanty
Where whiskey is plenty and the noney is scanty
A bod on the floor, a roof of thatch
And a string on the door instead of a latch
Now there were icepicks and toothpicks
And all kinds of lunatics, ice cream and cold cream
The girls were drinking kerosene
Now the night that Paddy Murphy died is one I111 not forget
The boys they started drinking and some ain't sober yet
Now the night that Paddy Murphy died
They came from far and near
They took the ioe right off the corpse, and put it in their beer.
And that's how we showed our respect for Paddy Murphy
That's how we showed our honor and our pride
That's how we showed our respect for Paddy Murphy
On the night that Paddy died
HERE'S TO________
Here's to________, he's true blue
He's a drunkard through and through
He's a drunkard so they say
Oh he tried to go to Heaven
But be went the other way
So drink chug-a-lug, chug-a-ltog, chug-a-lug
So drink chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug
110

THE HOST CHIVILROUS PISH
The most chivilrous fi9h in the ocean
To ladies forbearing and mild
Though his reocrd be dark, is the man-eating shark
Who will eat neither woman or child
He dines upon seamen and skippers
And a tourist will his hunger aswage
And a fresh cabin boy, will inspire him with joy
If hefs past the maturity age
A doctor or lawyer or preacher
He'll gobble up any fine day
But the ladies, God Bless 'em; he'll only address fem
Politely and go on his way
I can raedily dite you an instance
Of a lovely young lady fncnn Breem
Who was tender and sweet, and delicious to ^at
And fell into the bay with a scream
She struggled and flounced in the water
And signaled in vain for her barque
She would surely have drowned, if whe had not been found
By a chivilrous man-eating shark
He bowed in his manner most charming
Thus soothing her impulses wild
Don't be frightened, he said, Ifve been properly bred
And will eat neither woman nor child
He proffered his fin and she took it
Such gallantry none can ispute
And the passengers cheered, as the vessel they neared
And a broadside was fired a salute
They soon were alongside the vessel
A life saving dinghy was lowered
with the pick of the , and her relatives too
And the mate and the skipper aboard
They had her on board in a juffy
The shark stood attention the while
Then he raised up his flipper, and gobbled the skipper
And went on his way vith a smile
Thda shows that the king of the ocean
To ladies forbearing and mild
Though his record be dark, is the man-eating shark
Who will eat neither woman nor child
111

LETS HAVE A PAETY
Let's have a party, let's have some fun
Let's have a party, the 86th is her tonight
Break right, break left, streamers off the wing
Snap Dragon, Sweet roll, we do everything*
We are the joy boys from ol Youngstown
Hello, hillo, hello, hello-o-o
THE AIR FORCE HAS GOES TO HELL
(Tune: Mine eyes have seen the glory)
Mine eyes have seen the days of men
who ruled the fighting sky
With hearts that laughed at death and lived
for nothing but to fly
-But now those hearts are grounded
and those days are long gone by

^he &lr Force has gone to Hell.
Chorus: dory flying regulations
Have them read at every station
Crucify the man that breaks one
The Air lorce's gone to Hell,
I have seen them in their T-Bolts when
their eyes were dancing flame
I have seen their screaming power dives
That plastered Hitler's name
But now they fly like sissies
And they hang their heads in shame
Their Spirites shot to Hell.
Chorus
NAVY PRAYER
Our father who are in Washington
Truman is thy name
The Navy's done
The air force won
On the atlantic as in the Pacific
Give us this day our appropriations
And forgive us our accusations
As we forgive our accusers
Lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from French Morocco
For thine is the power
The B-36 and the Air Force
Forever and e^er-----Airmen
112A

STREET CLEANER SONG
(Tune - Carolina In the Morning)
Nothing could be meaner
Than to be a street cleaner
In the morning
Nothing wakes you bluer
Than to pick up horse manure
In the morning
When the horses unload
That!s what I really hate
Cleaning up horse manure
From four AM till eight
Strolling with my pushcart
When the breezes smell like cheese
In the morning
There!s nothing more I fear
Than a horse with diarrhea
In the morning
Whv can't they drop those little balls
That don!t stick to my overalls
In the morning
If I had Alladins lamp for only a day
I would make a wish or two
And here's what I'd say
I wish they would put glasses
All around those horses asses
In the morning
MOM'S IN BED
Mom's in bed, Pops on top
Kid's in the cradle saj^'n shoot it to her pop
Moms in bed, pops in jail
Sis is in the corner yellin pussy for sale
Moms in the kitchen, pops locked up
My hunch-backed brothers got my sister knocked up
Got a model T ford, a tank full of gas
A mouth full of titty and a hand full of ass
Haven't got a nickel, haven't got a dime
A house full of kids and none of them mine
113

DRINKIN RUM AN:- COCA COLA
Since the 45th cane to Sidi Slimane
They've got the french girls going insane
The french girls say they treat then nice
And they give them a better price
Chorus: Drinkin run and coca cola
Go down Port Lyautey
Both Mother and daughter
Working for a Yankee dollar
In French Morocco it is nighty clear
The Frenchman gets one can of beer
While the 45th leads a life so fine
Just making whopee all the tine
The SAC boys cane to Sidi this year
The girls all thought that they were queer
They don't dance, they just drink beer
They're glad that the 4-5th is here
The bonber jockeys cane and left the girls so cold
They acted like a million years old
They don't spend money so they say
The vrives in the states get all their pay
Before we landed on this field
The Officers club showed little yield
But now we'll build a club De Lux
The 45th is on the books
The anerican arms so they say
Allow Frauleins only through the day
There's that click click click all the night
But the O.D. says it's quite all right
chorus: Drinking run and coca cola
Go down to Walhalla
Both mother and daughter
Working for the yankee dollar
Up in Deutschland it is clear
The girls don't drink much gin or beer
They vail play and they will sin
But you've got to give up uour Sabre pin
Up in Frankfurt late one night
C^r tech rep got nighty tight
Made passionate love to a blonde in black
Now they're takin stitches in his back,
1U

TO THE TABLES DOWN AT SIM
(Tune-V/hiffenpoof S0ng)
To the tables down at Sidi
To the place where Chester dwells
T0 the dear old Dallas Bar we loved so well
Sang the motley crew assembled
With their glasses raised on high
And the horror of their singing sounds like hell
Yes, the horror of their singing
Of the songs that should sound well
hile we're wasting all the morning and our rest
We will serenade our Chester
While life and limb shall last
Till he's gone and been forgotten in the past
We1 re the 3906th who hfive gone astray
Baa, Baa, Baa
We'll try to be good till rotation day
Baa, baa, baa,
Officers, gentlemen, try to ba
We think we'll be here till eternity
Oh, please send a replacement for me
Baa, baa, baa
At the choir practice ni^itly
All the songs are sweet and low
Till that good old demon rum begins to flow
Then tonsils they get rusty
And the voices get off key
And the wives declare that now they have to go
The women leave discretely
And the songs get more risque
And tales of war are told by those who fly
They fight the war in Burma
And the war in Europe too
And each one tries to tell a bigger lie
We are members of the Sisi choir
la, la, li
We will sing the song that you desire
la, la, la
Cocks men we profess to be
Full of scotch type energy
Hope we live on past this spree
la, la, la.
115

HaTATIOHAIi J5VJ5
(Tune- Red River Valley)
Life in Sidi Slimane is so peaceful
But the rumors are true that we've heard
The quiet is soon to be broken
By arrival of SAC'S 303rd
From old Tucson they say they are leaving
Leaving homes and sweet lovin wives
3hey will come here to old French Morocco
And complicate all of our lives
Now they'll have lots of aircraft and people
And they'll have at least thirty I know
Who will spend all their waking moments
Making work for the base AIO
But we'll not be about to get excited
For the answer to most of our fears
Is to pass on the buak just as always
Straight on to the Corps of Sngineers
The odds are that we cannot please them
There are sure to be waits and delays
But if we can stand it for two years
They can stand it for just thirty days
SOUTH OF THE BORDER
That louse of a boarder
Who else could it be
While I was away at work
That lousy jerk filled in for me
Oh I didS't get angry
Though it's driving me wild
For he may be the father of my only child
Oh the baby's first words were manana
It was then I could plainly see
That it was a real ^exicana
And there's no Spanish blood in me
Oh I stabbed that boarder
I stabbed him that day
I cut him from the Rio Grande to the Sante Fe
I cut off his boleros
Now he'll never play
South of the border, in a Mexican way
116

Once I had a naufhty little dog
A naughty little dog m he
I loaned him to a lady ffiend
To keep her company
Now all around the house %bm$ night
That naughty little dog did bunt
Hefd stick his nose beneath her dress
And try to smell her------
Shame on you you naughty little dog
You make my temper rise
There's only one man in this whole world
Who can sleep between her——
Thank the lady for the wine
I'll drink it for my supper
Damn the man who's got a girl
And ain't got the guts to~—
Fumble fumble all around
It's time that we should start
I ate some "beans for supper
And I think I'm going to -———*—
Forty dollars I will hid
And six hits I will pass
Damn the girl the sote my dice
And stuck them up her—-—*
Ask your partner for her name
I need it for a list
Excuse me while I go outside
And try to take a——~——
Pistol belt around my hip*
And around this town I1!! frolic
Take your partners in the house
While he piays with his———
Ball, play ball the umpire cried
Oh how that man can hit
Take him to the alley
Cause I think he's going to—™*
Shame on you, you naughty little hoy
Tou know that mule will Wck
And there you stand behind M»
W^ th you hand upon his— •■ —
(°onH next page) U?

NAUGHTY LITTLE DOG (CONTD)
Prick the elephant with the prod
To hear the monster yell
If he should step upon you
He would smash you all to _________
Help, help, the sailor cried
A s though the sea he swain
Swin or sink the skipper said
Cause I don't give a _________.
Damn ny hide for every little thing
I111 sing a little nore
Once I sat in a parlor
With my ams around a _________.
Hold on there my pretty little girl
What is it that you say
If you should sit on another mans lap
You'd get a dose of ________•
Clap, clap, clap your hands
My song will never last
If you don!t like this song I sing
You can kiss my bloody ass
SIDI SLB1ANE "ONG
(Tune - On Top of Old Smoky)
Now gather round closely, and we'll sing this refrain
Bout life in Morocco, at Sidi Slimand
There's not enough women, to grace this bare land
But there's not enough women, to grace this bare land
But there's plenty of rag heads, Cactus and sand
The heat in the daytime, will wither your soul
While all the long evenings, you shiver with cold
It's so hot in old Sidi, where no river flows
You'd think hell was above you, and heaven below
Each man here will tell you, that he!s inalassigned
And the Air Force commanders, have all lost their minds
We here in Sidi, want to know why we're here
A nd we'll not find our answer, in a big glass of beer
So we'll try some tye whiskey, and we'll try demon rum
And a gallon of cognac, and the answer will come
We need some equipment, and we need some supplies
But improvement, will be a surprise
Work from dawn till sunset, on many big deals
While those boys from division, are dragging their hoels
The boys you will notice, who take it so hard
Are recalled reservists, and the ^ir National Guard
While I'm sitting here singing, Ifve had an idea
It's rough in Morocco, But death in Korea
118

LET OUL MOTHER NATURE HAVE HER 1<AY
Boy-san wipe away then tears
Wef re goin down to the house of norrors
To let ole mother nature have her way
Goin to look into then norrors of glass
An watch myself get a piece of ass
Lettin ole nother nature have her way
Chorus: Closer, cone a skoshi bit closer
Oh there ainft no use to dick aroung this way
Put your belly close to nine
We're gonna ^o pon-pon four or five tines
To let ole nother nature have her way
hoshi-moshi Boy-san roake a skoshi trip
Down to the Officers club at the strip
To let ole nother nature have her way
Ue ' re goin down to that glorified pub
Known as the Allied Officers Club
To let ole nother nature have her way
Shrinp cocktails and a great big steak
Will really put us on the nake
To let ole nother nature have her way
But before we go down to that palace of sin
We better load up with a few thousand Yen
To let ole nother nature have her way
Hooray now here we are at last
Mana=san parade then jo-sans past
To let ole nother nature have her way
Now that !un!s as cute as apup with specks
Then chi-chifs didn't cone fron no P.J),
Just let ole nother nature have her way
Mana-san I111 take that one over there
With the great big chi-chifs and the sukoshi hair
To let ole nother nature have her way
Oh it shorely seems an awful sin
to p"y this jo-san a thousand yen
To let ole nother nature have her way
Jo-santaihen kawaii aa
Pom pon O-nae-ni sukL des1 ha
To let ole nother nature have her way
Hai, hai, so desu, suki dhsho
Keredono shakuhachii suki nai/yo
To let ole mother nature have her way
Oh you wake up in the morning ¥ doling like shit
And nine days later it starts to drip
To let ole mother nature have her way
You tell Doc Beetlebaum the fix you1 ire in
He fills yore ass full of penicillin
To let ole mother nature have her way
(con!t next page)
119

LET OLE MOTHER NATURE HAVE HER WAY (Cont)
But you will really begin to curse your fate
When yore shankers break out as bi*; as pie plates
To let ole nother nature have her way
^own to Doc Beetlebaum's office again
To get yoire ass full of aureomycin
To let ole mother nature have her way
Then one fine mcrnin you junro out of the sack
To find the little son-of-a-bitch has turned coal black
To let ole mother nature hr.ve her way
The doc says stand on your toes and cough
Imagine his surprise when your b^lls fall off
To let ole mother nature have her way
Don't worry doc Beetlebaum tells you the score
They111 never be missed on your next 60-^
To let ole mother nature have her
3ut youfll sound a little funny transmittin for a fix
(High Voice) Hello DP Homer one two three four five six
To let ole mother nature have her way
WE SOLD OUR CftW
We sold our cow
We sold our cow
We fve got no use
For your bull now
CLOVIS
(No tune)
He stood before the perarly gate
His face was scarred and old
He stood before the man of fate
Tor admission to the fold
"What have you done/" St Peter said
"To gain admission here?"
"I've been a fighter pilot, sir.
For many and many a year
I've Sought the dust and flown the fB?
With the frozen chosen few
I've been at Clovis Mr Force Base
And parts of Texas too."
The pearly gates wwung open wide
St Peter touched the bell
"Come in and chose your harp, my friend
Youfve had j&our share of hell,
120

WE HEARD YOU WHEN YOU SANG
__________,__________, We heard you when you sang
We don't like it, but we'll listen,
For tomorrow you'll probably prang
This is table number one,
Number one, number one,
'^his is table number one,
Where in the hell is two?
This is table (Squadron Number)
^ho in the hell are you?
This is table best of all
Best of all, Best of all
fhis is table best of all
ho is the hell are you?
Beer Song
For it's beer, beer, beer
Toat makes you want to cheer
Jn the corps, int the corps
or it's beer, beer, beer
That makes you want to cheer
in the U S Air Force
My eyes are dim, I cannot see
I have (Hi) not (HO) brought my
kpecs with me.
1 iskay that makes you feel so frisky
Gin that makes you want to sin
Vodka that makes you feel to hotka
Old Saturn that makes you beely burn
Old vermouth that makes you feel uncouth
Bourbon that makes you feel so chirpe
Wine that makes you feel so fine
Champagne, champagen, champagne, that
makes you want to campaign
or that makes you want to cheer
Rum that makes you feel so glum
120-A

It is sad, but true, that sooner or laterf most igh^er Pilots
find themselves shafted out of the Squr. ron, and into that oft
cursed orginazation called «*ir 3?se Group. T is song is for
Them to sing to their former friends
(Tune- Save a Fighter Pilots Ass)
Pilots, gentle Pilots, pilots one and all

^ly hoys, flashy Fly boys, please listen to our call
Buzz boys, busy Buzz boys, this is all we ask
Thake those Goddamn Sabre Jets and shove them ur> your ass
Chowus: siqg Kalleluia, Sing Halleluia
Stick you finger up your ass, join the fighter pilot class
Sing Halle luia, sing Hallaluia
Stick your finger up your ass and flap your wings
T/ho feeds the sons of bitches and clothes their scrawny backs
Who guards their goddamn airplanes and heats their fucking shacks
Who gives them light and water, not Kimpo Power and Gass
If they don't like the service they can blow it out their ass
TDY to Tsuiki, went to the Sabre Dance1
Saw a Sukoshi pilot get in a Josans pants
It cost him thirty dollars for just a little feel
Along came an Air Base Group nan who got it for a steal
Jet Jocks are the hot shots, we'll tell you one and all
And when it comes to shootings they're really on the ball
They had a little contest of prove who was the first
But when the score was counted they ended up the worst
You see these flashy Jet Boys climb from their shiny hacks
With moon suits and silly jock straps a hanging from their backs
They sing the praise of Sammy Small with wild and wide aclaim
Just Fighter Pilots—Pilots, without a fucking brain
*hey spin their yarns of Air Way, by pilots brave and fair
Eighty percent is bull-shit, and twenty more is air
We hear that they're by far the best and that we'd better believe
But where in the Hell would the fly boys be
If the Air Bpse Group should leave
The squawk box screams of flak holes and tanks all out of gas
Of takusan MIGfs and bandits a playing on their ass
They get their bloorain balls shot off but still they brag of it
With one accord we'll tell the woirld, they can't fly for shit
THE END