Version #4

burns' merry muses.                           43
Yon wandering rill, that marks the hill,
And glances o'er the brae, sir.
"Sides by a bower, where mony a flower
Sheds fragrance on the day, sir,
There Damon lay with Silvia gay,
To love they thought nae crime, sir,
The wild birds sang, the echoes rang,
While Damon's ------beat time, sir,
First wi' the thrush, he thrust and pushed,
His pintle large and strong, sir,
The blackbird next, his tunefu' text,
Mad* him both bold and strong, sir,
The linnet's lay came then in play,
And the lark that soared aboon, sir,
Till Damon fierce, mistimed his a------,
And spent quite out of time, sir.
THE BONNIEST LASS.                ,
The bonniest lass that you meet niest,
Gie her a kiss and a' that,
In spite o' Ilka parish priest,
Repenting stool, and a' that.
For a' that, and a, that,
Their min-mou'd sangs, and a' that.
In time the place convenient,
They'll do't themselves for a' that
Your patriarchs in days of yore,
Had their handmaids in days o' yore,
0' bastard gets some had a score,
And some had mair than a' that.
For a' that, and a' that,
Your lang syne s aunts and a' that,
Were fonder of a bonny lass,
Than you- or I for a' that.
Xing David when he waxed auld,
An' blude ran thin and a' that,
And found his blood was growing cauld,
Could not refrain for a' that.

44                     burns' merry muses.
For a' that, and a' that,
To keep him warm, and a' that,
*         .              The daughters o' Jerusalem
Were waled from him and a' that.
Wha wadna pity the sweet dames
He fumbled at and a' that,
And raised their blood up into flames
He could not drown for a' that.
For a' that, and a' that,
He wanted pith, and a' that,
For as to^what we shall not name,
What could he do—but claw that ?
King Solomon, Prince o' Divines,
Wha Proverbs made, and a' that,
Baith mistresses and concubines
In hundreds had and a' that.
For a' that, and a' that,
Tho' a preacher wise and a' that,
The smuttiest sang that e'er was sung,
His Sang o⁷ Sangs was a' that.
Then still I swear a clever chiel,
Should kiss his lass and a' that,
Though priests consigns him to the deil,
As reprobate and a' that.                        _t
, .                  For a' that, and a' that,
Their canting stuff and a⁵ that,
They ken nae mair what's reprobate,
Than you or I, for a' that.
PARODY ON CORN RIGGS.
My Patie is a lover gay,
He's always very funny,
And when we meet to sport and play,
He takes me by the cunny.
He claps his------between my thighs,
My------h_e'_s almost rending,
His tool's so stuff, and such a size,
But 'tis Heaven when we are spending.

burns' merry muses.                      45
Last night he took me by the------,
And swore that he would delve it,
And rap his cods against my bntt,
When tipping me the velvet.
He laid me down upon my------,
And swore that he'd enjoy me,
Then quick pulled out his rousing tarse,
I thought he would destroy it.
Let maidens of a fickle mind
Refuse what most they're wanting,
Since we for------w^Tere designed,
We surely should be granting,
So when your lover feels your------,
Do not be sly, or grieve him,
But open out your pretty thighs,
For a f------'s like going to heaven.

4:6                         burns' merry muses
ENGLISH.
THE PLENIPOTENTIARY.
Tune ~" The Terrible Law, or Shawnbuce.'¹
The Dey of Algiers, when afraid of his ears,
A messenger sent to our Court, sir,
As he knew in our state that the women had weight,
He choose one well huntr for the sport, sir
He searched the Divan till he found out a man
Whose b-----where heavy and hairy, j^
And he lately came o'er from the Barbary shore,
As the great Plenipotentiary.
When to England he came, with his p - in a flame,
He shewed it his Hostess on landing,
Who spread its renown thro' all parts of the town,
As a pintle past all understanding.
So much there whs said of its snout and its head,
That they called it the great Janissary;
Not a lady could sleep till she got a sly peep
At the great Plenipotentiary.
As he rode in the coach, how the whores did approach.,
And stared, as if stretched on a tenter ;
He drew every eye of the dames that pass by
Like the sun to its wonderful centre.
As he passed thro' the town not a window was down,
And the maids hurried out to the are i,
The children cried "Look, there's the man with the
cock,
That's the great Plenipotentiary."
When he came to the Court, oh, what giggle and sport"
Such squinting and squeezing to view him,
What envy and spleen in the women were seen,
All happy and pleased to get him.
They vowed from their hearts, if men of such parts
Where found on the coast of Harbary,
³Tis a shame not to bring a whole guard for the King,
Like the great Plenipotentiary.

BCRNS' MERRY M SES.                              47 •
The dames of intrigue, formed their c— in a league,
To take him in turns like good folks, sir,
The young misses' plan was to catch as catch can,
And all were resolved on a stroke, sir,
The cards to invite flew by thousands each night,
With bribes to the old secretary,
And the famous Eciipse was not let for more leaps,
Than the great Plenipotentiary.
When his name was announced, how the women all
bounced,
And their blood hurred up to ^: heir faces :
He made them all itch, from navel to breech,
And their bubbies burst out all their laces.
There was such damned work to be f-----by the Turk,
That nothing their passion could vary ;
All the nations fell sick for the Barbary p-----
Of the great Plenipotentiary.
A Duches whose Duke made her ready to puke,
With fumbling and f-----g all night, sir,
Being first for the prize, was so pleased with its size,
That she begged for to stroke its big snout, sir,
My stars, cried her grace, its head's like a mace,
'Tis as high as the Corsican fairy ;
I'll make up, please the pigs, for dry bobs and frigs,
With the great Plenipotentiary.
And now to be bor'd with this Ottoman Lord,
Came a Virgin far gone the wane, sir,
t^he resolved for to try, tho' her c------was so dry,
That she knew it must split like a cane, sir,
True it was as she spoke, it gave way at each stroke,
But oh, what a woeful quandary,
With one terrible thrust her old piss-bladder burst
On the groat Plenipotentiary.
That next to be tried w^Tas an Alderman's Bride,
With a c-----that would swallow a turtle,
She had horned the dull brows of her worshipful
spouce,
Till they sprouted like Venus's myrtle

48                      burns' merry muses.
Thro' thick and thro' thin, bowel deep he dashed in,
Till her c------frothed like cream in a dairy,
And expressed by loud farts she was strained in all
parts,
By the great Plenipotentiary.
The next to be kissed, on the the Plenipo's list,
Was a delicate Maiden of Honour,
She screamed at the sight of his p-----, in a fright,
Tho' she'd had the whole Palace upon her.
0 Lord, she said, what a p-----for a maid !
Do, pray, come look at it, Gary !
But I will have one drive if I'm ripped up alive
By this great Plenipotentiary.
Two sisters next came, Peg and Molly by name,
Two ladies of very high breeding,
Resolved one should try, while the other stood by,
And watch the amusing proceeding,
Peg swore by the gods that the mussulman's cods
Were as big as both buttocks of Mary ;
Molly cried with grunt, he has ruined my c-----
With his great Plenipotentiary.
The next for this plan, was an old Harridan,
Who had swallowed huge p------from each nation,
With over much use she had broken the sluice
'Twixt her------and its lower relation.
But he stuck her so full, that she roared like a bull,
Crying out she was bursting and weary.
So tight was she stuck by this wonderful f-----
Of the great Plenipotentiary.
The next for a shag came the new Yankee flag ;
Tho' lanky and scraggy in figure,
She was fond of the quid, for she had been well rid,
From Washington down to a nigger.
Oh, my ! such a size, 1 guess it's first prize.
It's a wonder, quite next aSTi-a-gary.
W-a-a-1, now I'm in luck, stranger let's f-----,
Bully for the great Potentiary.
All heads were bewitched and longed to be stitched,
Even babies would languish and linger,
And the boarding-school Miss as she sat down to piss,
Drew a Turk on the floor with her finger

burns' merry muses.                       49
For fancied delight, they all clubbed for a shite,
To frig in the school necessary,
And the teachers from france, f—d a la distance,
With the great Plenipotentiary.
Each sluice-c—d bawd, who'd been s----d abroad,
Till her premises gaped like a grave, sir,
Found luck was so thick, she could feel the Turk's p—,
Though all others were lost in her cave, sir.
The nymphs of the stage did his ramrod engage,
Made him free of their gay seminary ;
And the Italian Signors opened all their back doors
To the great Plenipotentiary.
Then of love's sweet reward, measured out by the yard,
The Turk was most blest of mankind, sir,
For his powerful dart went right home to the heart,
Whether stuck in before or behind, sir.
But no pencil can draw this great-pintled Bashaw,
Then let each c t-loving contemporary,
As cocks of the game, let drink to the name
Of the great Plenipotentiary*
UNA'S LOCK.
'Twas on a sweet May morning,
When violets were a-springing,
The dew the meads adorning,
The larks melodious singing ;
The rose trees, by each breeze,
Were gently wafted up and down,
And the primrose that then blows,
Bespankled nature's verdant gown.
The purling rill, the murmuring stream,
Stole gently through the lofty grove.
Such wae the time when Darby stole
Out to meet his barefoot love.
Tol, lol, etc.
Sweet Una was the tightest,
Genteelest of the village dames ;
Her eyes they were the brightest
That e'er set youthful heart in flames.

50                              BUR>^Ts' MERRY iMUSES.
Her lover, to move her,
By every art in vain essay'd,
In ditty, for pity,
This lovely maid he often prayed.
But she perverse, his suit denied,
Sly Darby, being enraged at this,
Resolved, when next they met, to seize
The lock that scatters Una's piss.
Tol lol, etc.
Beneath a lofty spreading oak,
She sat with cow and milking pail,
From lily hands, at each stroke
In flowing streams the milk did steal
With peeping and creeping,
Sly Darby now comes on apace.
In raptures the youth sees                               1/
The blooming beauties of her face.
Fired with her charms he now resolved
No longer to delay his bliss
But instantly to catch the lock                       _,
That scatters pretty Una's piss
Tol lol, etc.
Upon her back he laid her,
Turned up her smock so lily white,
With joy the youth surveyed her, : •
Then gazed with wonder and delight..
Her thighs they were so snowy fair,
And just between appeared a crack.
The lips red, and overspread
With curling hairs of jetty black.
Transported, Darby now beholds
The sum <>f all his promised bliss,
And instantly he catched the lock
That scatters pretty Una's piss.
Tol lol, etc.              . . .
Within his arms he seized her,
And pressed her to his pantiug breast,
What more could have appeased her
But oaths which Darby meant in jest.

BURNS' MERRY McSES.                              51
He swore he'd adore but her,
And to her ever constant prove.
He'd wed her, he'd bed her,
And none on earth but her he'd love.
With vows like those he won her o'er,
And hoped she take it not amiss,
If he presumed to catch the lock
That scatters pretty Una's piss.
Tol lol, etc.
His cock it stood erected,
His breeches down about his heels,
And what he long expected,
He now with boundless rapture feels.
Now entered and concentrated,
The beauteous made lay in a trance,
His bollocks went like elbows
Of fiddlers in a country dance,
The melting Una, now she cries,
I'd part with life for joy like this ;
With showers of bliss they jointly oiled
The lock that scattered Una's piss.
Tol lol, etc
DARBY'S KEY TO UNA'S LOCK.
Cold, pinching raw the night was,
Each purling stream in crystal bound,
All nature quite a sight was,
Both lifeless, leafless, all around.
The birds' throats had no notes.
They nestled close to keep them warm.
The peasants done, were trudging home,
With labour tired upon the farm.
Night's ebon cloak wrapped nature up,
When Una made a rousing fire,
Prepared the cup, the hearth swept up,
To cheer her love, her heart's desire.
Tol lol, etc.
To love's appointment true he came,
. His fingers aching with the cold,
With joy he pledged his little dame,
The village new to hers he told.

52                      burns' merry muses.
In straw chair he placed her,                ^x
And on a stool before her sat.
And nigher to the fire
Were placed the little dog and cat.
His breeches 'twixt the thighs were broke,
And as he sat nigh on the ground,
Something with his shirt slipped out
You'd swear he'd got an awful wound.
Tol lol, etc.
The fire's bright heat soon made it stir,
The kitten looked, lifted up her paw,
She twirled her tail began to purr,
And jumping up, this thing did claw.
Darby bounced, and Una flounced,
That a thing twelve inches long was seen
One part lay like a sheep's heart,
The other like a rolling pin.
" 0 Lord," says she "what's this I see, j
That doth my delicacy shock ? "
" Be soothed," he said, " my pretty maid,
'Tis Darby's key to Una's lock "
Tol lol, etc.
" This key, dear Una, view it,
Its powers aud wondrous great;
Folks of all ranks go to it,
Both maids of low and high estate.
The little maid oft pants for this,
Whose cunny's like a needle's eye,
And the bouncing dame with lecn'rous flame,
Whose c--— would a horse collar vie.
'Tis nature's powerful master key,
That keeps alive Creation's stock.
I'll show my pretty maid the way
To turn this key within your lock."
Tol lol, etc
All raging with his keen desire,
He Una cross the table laid,
And with a p-----stark mad with fire,
He strove to perforate the maid.

BURNS^ MERRY MUSES.                              53
It being large, at the first charge,
He burned priming in the pan,
Which oiled the stock of Una's lock,
And at her again he then began.
She wriggled her a — , threw up her legs,
And cried " F-----on, tho' I'm undone.
O Darby dear," she says, ^k" ne'er fear,
But I disjoint your jiggling bone."
Tol lol, etc.
THE GOLDFINCH'S NEST.                _T
Fair Phillidia long jolly Roger had pressed
To get her by some means a goldfinch's nest ;
Had she but a young one, she oft would say,
She'd kiss it and nurse it all night and all day.
Says Roger to Phillidia, " Now is the time.
The evening serene is, the spring is in prime,
To yon myrtle grove well together repair,
And a goldfinch I'll have, if a goldfinch be there."
They went into the wood, but no nest could they find,
When weary with search on a bank they reclined,
When Roger with warmth fair Phillidia pressed,
And soon laid his hand on the goldfinch's nest.
" I've found it, I've found it (in raptures he cried),
And in it a young one whose mouth opens wide."
" It's always a-gaping," sly Phillidia said,
"All night and all day - the poor thing should be fed.'
The youth took the hint, and he fed the poor bird,
The maiden all hushed was, and said not a word.
He fed it and crammed it, a mischievous knave,
Till, poor little thing, it gave back what lie gave.
" Dear Roger," said she, "too much have you given,
And though 'twas in jest, I shall with you be even,
So now pray take notice, as sure as you're born,
Again and again you must feed it ere morn."

54                       burns' merry muses.
LUCY AND KITTY'S BLACK JOCKS.
Who has e'er been at Hereford must needs know the
Bell,
Where Lucy and Kitty, two sisters do dwell,
With their black jocks and bellies so white.
None ever saw Lucy but wished to have kissed her,
Yet her charms were eclipsed by those of her sister,
So easy, so gay, so genteel on my life
That either was fit for an Emperor's wife.
With their black jocks, &c.
With romping fatigued and the heat of the weather,
One day on the bed they both lay down together,
With their black jocks, &c»
They sighed and they talked of they did not know
what,
At length a sound sleep put an end to their chat. .
I forget to premise they were stripped to their smock_y
And the treacherous chamber-door wanted a lock,,
To their black joc-<s, &c.
Young Cupid, who's always alert to his post,
And thought the occasion too good to be lost,
To a black jock, &c
So he slyly retired, and returned in a trice,
With a cock of the game, a true heart without price,
Says he, " Now's your time, while they're both fast
asleep,
Creep into them softly and try for a peep,
At their black jocks, &c»                                     ' ■
Then silent and cautious he lifted the latch,
Resolved the critical moment to catch,
At rfieir black jocks, &c.
But oh how he stared when he came to the bed,
In their faces how blended the white and the red,
Such bubbles, such arms, such legs, and such thighs _?
But the thing of all things that attracted his eyes,
Was their black jocks, &c.
Lucy's posture he found was the most opportune,
So her smock being up he got iu very soon,
To liar black jock, &c.

BURNS⁵ MERRY MUSES.               *               55
As matters went forward, the closer he crept,
The faster lie hugged her, the faster she sleept ;
As long as he could he remained in his seat
But at length was obliged to beat a retreat,
From her black jock, &c
Next Kitty he saw, and his mouth 'gaii to water,
Fresh vigour returned, and he swore he'd be at her
Black jock, &c
But here he had reckoned without any host,
He could not get in, her legs were so crossed ;
He tried every way to make matters fit,
But all was in vain, for he never could hit
Her black jock, &c
Enraged at being baulked, his scissors he took,
And out of revenge he cut out every lock
From her black jock, &c.
Then soft as he entered away did he creep,
As fast as he found them he left them asleep ;
Kitty, waking soon after, her hand laid across
The spot, and directly discovered the loss
Of her black jock, &c.
Her sister she waked in the utmost despair,
" Lucy," said she, ' I've lost all the hair
Of my black jock, &c.
" What shall I do, or where can I go ?
A bald c-----is not worth a farthing you know.
This cruel disgrace I can never withstand ;
Look here, it's as bare as the palm of my hand,
My poor black jock, &c.
While I was asleep as I hope to be saved,
Some villian got into the room and has shaved
My black jock, &c.
Lucy laughed in her sleeve, but soon forcing a frown,
In a counterfeit fright clapped her hand on her own,
Says she, "If we'd slept on, we'd have suffered
-together,
For see how the rascal has spread all his leather
On my black jock and belly so white."

56                       burns' mekry muses.
CUPID'S FROLIC
What words can paint the pleasure
That springs from lov's soft powers*,
When nature's tufted treasure
Pours sweet in spermy showers.
0 Cudid, all creation,
Enjoy the lustful time
Of charming copulation,
As nature's true sublime.
The crimson fluid glowing,
Each pore perspiring love,
Each eye with Joy o'erfiowing,
The muscles lewdly move.
O Cupid, &e.
In amorous pomp appearingj
Amazed the maiden eyes,
Love's rudder, Cupid steering,
To harbour 'tween her thighs,.
O Cupid, &c
Now lewdly soft caressing,
The pliant limbs entwine,
To velvet velvet pressing,                        i
Then springs the maiden mine*..
O Cupid &c.
At leugth the lewd infusion,                    <i
O'er Sows its mossy bounds,                  '
Her atoms dance confusion,
She criesjin moving sound*.              ' * .
0 Cupid, &c.
A SENTIMENTAL SPRIG.
Tine— "Push about the Jorum."
My honest hearts that love to sing,
And hate the wretch that's boastings
Come let us make the chamber sing
With sentimental toasting.                    "_K

burns' mekry muses.                      57
The sacred love of liberty,
And liberty in loving,                              V
In this fond wish we all agree,                    -
However prone to roving.
The mouth that often has two beards,
And swallews without chewing;
The fair one who neither snorts nor girds,
ut love's to bill when cooing.
Life's luscious dish, a brace of cocks,
With the sweet sauce of kisses,
Unlocking well the lock of locks,
With key of mortal blisses.
The grave that does cast up the dead,
And burries well the living ;
Love's baby rocked in nature's bed.
The girl that takes when giving.
The key that slips the maiden out,
And let's the lover enter ;
The bird within, the bush without,
Attractions lovely centre.
May good men ever pleasure taste,
And taste have in their pleasure ;
The maid that spends, and will not taste
One atom of her treasure ;
The tapping with the spiggot,
That gives the lass a tumour,
The balls that beauteous women beat,
Into a pleasant humour.
. The lines that mutual passion paints,
Success to young beginners ;
Here's to the mother of all ₀aints,
A maker of all sinners.
The human bump when t&'en in hand,              ' 1
With Cupid's cover on it ;
The nick that makes the tail to stand,
And bud-rue's scarlet bonnet.
The little pilot, though he's blind,
Who steers in love's harbour ;
The lass who lathers us when kind,
The handsome female barber.

58                             BURNS' MERRY MUSES.
The mouth that spews up all mankind,
The tune of tune in farces,
Is that duet with parts conjoined,
Tn the opera of a-----s.
The middle finger's favourite ring,
That friction sets on fire ;
The tuneful bells that always ring
When maidenheads expire ;
The small thatched house beneath the hill,
The fountain in Hair Court, sirs,
May sportsmen have of game their fill,
And huntsmen have good sport, sirs.
A PARODY ON "SHEPHERDS I HAVE LOST
MY LOVE."
Shepherds I have got the clap,
Stroking of my Anna ;
My time's filled up, oh sad mishap,
With taking salts and senna.
I for her King's Place forsook,
Where girls I had past telling ;
But now my pipe's turned to a crook,
My b------, how they're hanging.
Never will I stroke her more,
But to the devil pitch her ;
Shepherds mark the dirty whore,
Beware, though, thou------her.
With whey and gruel all day fed,
Youth by me take warning,
Three pills e'er I go to bed.
And four again each morning.
THE HAPPY BUNTER.
H6w happy a state does the Bunter possess,
Who ne'er be greater and ne'er can be less ;
On her face and her c-----she depends for support,
As well as do some of the madams at court.
What though she may often in coarse linen go,
Nor boast if fine laces t;> make a great show,
Yet a girl in that dress may be jucier far
Than a lady that's f------by a garter and star.

burns' merry muses.                       59
Though her hands they are red and her bubbies are
coarse,
Her c----- for all that may be nothing the worse,
A court demirep with less vigour may play,
And her passions in motions less charming convey.
What though a youug stallion she sometimes may lack,
When warm with desire and stretched on her back,
In this, too, examples great ladies afford,
Who oft put a footman in place of a lord.
Or should she endeavour to heap an estate,
In this, too, she mimics the punks of State,
Whose aims are but slyly to get a good stroke,
As all her concern's to supply her black jock.
At night when sport's over, with drinking made dry,
Unsated with swiving, she snoring does lie,
Then rises next morning for shagging most keen,
If thus f----like a Bunter, then who'd be a queen ?
THE CITADEL.
I am a sporting amorous maid,
That ranged this nation up and down,
In every place my fame's displayed,
In Cupid's wars I've gained renown.
Amongst them all, both great and small,
With vast applause I've bore the bell,
I've a little fort, 'twas built for sport,
And by some is called the Citadel.
Through it runs a purling stream,
Whose force would turn a little mill,
It's in a forest sweetly hid,
And sheltered by gentle hill.
Such curious art in every part,
Its architect none can excel;
That workman rare, with wondrous care,
Had fortified my Citadel.
A captain brave, his skill to try,
Resolved for to besiege my fort;
I did this son of Mars defy,
And straight blocked up my sally-port.

60                              BURNS' MERRY Ml SES.                   "' •*
' '          For its defence, with cautious caie,
Each avenue I guarded well, ;
For the attack he did prepare,
And swore he'd storm my Citadel.
Just in front, upon a plain,
His battery opened to my view ;
Being fully bent the tower to gain,
Still nearer to the gate he drew.
No art or means I left untried
This fierce assailant to repel,
A bastion flanked upon each side
The entrance to my Citadel.
When he the covered way he gained,
He on the breastwork made a halt,
His vanguard being well sustained,
He now prepared for the assault.
With furious rage lie did assail,
The town he entered pell-mell;
His metal flew about like hail
In the centre of my Citadel
By him oppressed and sore distressed,
My outworks all being beaten down,
One effort I resolved to try,
In hopes to drive him from the town.
I opened straight my water gate,
Such a rapid torrent on him fell
As quickly forced him to rerteat,
And quite forsake my Citadel.
The hero being mad with rage,
Resolved for to attack again,
I was unwilling to engage.
I found resistance was in vain.
Xo succour nigh, my fountain dry,
By which I might the foe repel;
I being afraid, beat the chamade,
And surrendered up my Citadel.
When he entered it I humbly craved
That he would not the works destroy,
Like a man of honour he behaved,
And only fired a feu de joie.

burns' merry muses.                       61
He marched away, but now I find                 / *
I've the sad story for to tell,
That to my grief he left behind
Some wildfire in my Citadel.
If any young man should now dare
Invade my Citadel again,
To enter it, let him beware,
For if he does he'll suffer pain.
Should any form this design,
The truth to him I'll plainly tell,
On him I'll quickly spring a mine,
'Twill scorch him in my Citadel.
BOTANY BAY.                         '■'•;.
Britannia, fair guardian of this favoured land,
To a scheme gaver sanction by the Ministry planned,
For transporting her sons who from honour should
stray,
To a sweet spot terrestrial, called Botany Bay.
Now this Bay, by some blockheads, we've sagely been
told,
Was unknown to the famed navigators of old,
But this I deny in terms homely and blunt,
For Botany Bay is the -pot we call c------.
Our ancestor Adam, 'tis past any doubt,
Was the famous Columbus that found the spot out;
He braved every billow, rock, quicksand, and shore,
To steer through the passage none o'er steered thro'
before.
Kind Nature, ere Adam had put off to sea,
Bid him be of good cheer, for his pilot she'd be ;
Then his cables he split, and stood straight for the Bay,
But was stopped in his passage about midway.
Though shook by the stroke, Adam's mast stood upright,
His ballast was steady, his tackling was tight,
Then a breeze springing up, down the Bed Straits he
run,
And o'er joyed at his voyoge he fired off a great gun.

62                       burns' merry muses
⁴⁴ Avast," Adam cried, " I'm dismasted, I doubt,
If I don't tack the head of my vessel about."
" Take courage," cried Nature, " leave it to me,
It's only the entrance into the Red Sea."
High from the masthead, by the help of one eye,
The heart of the Bay did old Adam espy,
And alarmed at some noise, to him nature did say,
" That it was a trade-wind, that blows always one
way."
So transported was Adam with sweet Botany Bay,
He Dame Nature implored to spend their night and day,
And curious, he tried the Bay's bottom to sound,
But this line was too short by a yard from the ground.
The time being out Nature's sentence had passed,
Adam humbly a favour of her bounty asked,
And when stocked with provisions, and everthing
sound,                                                                      ,
To Botany Bay he again might be bound
Nature granted the boon, both to him and his race,
And said, "Oft I'll transport you to that charming
place ;
Aut never," she cried, " as your honour my word,
Set sail with a clap, pox, or famine < n board."
Then this Botany Bay, or------, much the same,
I have proved is the spot whence all of us came ;
May we there be transported with pleasure and speed,
And nourish its soil with sowing our seed,
*•■ '                   THE PIOUS PARSON.
Tune - ■ⁱⁱOf noble race was Shenkin."
There was a pious Parson,
Who lived at Upper Harding,
That loved his lass,
And pretty lass,
And hated dice and carding
*' The parson went a courting,
To ladies was unlucky,
For all he said,
To wife or maid,
Was, " Madam, shall I f-----ye ?"

burns' merry muses.                       63
This parson when in London,                           5
Lodged near to Norton Folgate,
He coached Sal Oarr
From Temple Bar,
And f-----her quite to Aldgate.
He once swived Oyster Nelly,
With c-----as black as charcoal,
He f-----so quick
That he fired his p------
With friction in her dark hole.
He finger f-----the Furies,
He bollocked the bitches,
Jove and all Gods                                        .
He beat for Gods,
So large they burst his breeches.
He stitched the goddess Juno,
That haughty bitch of thunder,
He rammed his tarse
Into her-----,                                   _            i-
And split her----- asunder.
His p-----was full twelve inches,
The total he did give her ;
He f-----her tight                                       ,
Twelve times a night,
I And the thirteenth turned her liver
THE BUMPER TOAST.
I can't for my life guess the cause of this fuss,             ' "
Why ye drink the health of each high-titled bel -
dame ;
What a Queen or a Princess or a Duchess to us ?
We never have spoke to, and see them but seldom. '
Fill a bumper, my host, and I'll give you a toast,
We all have conversed with and everyone knows ;
Fill it up to the top, and drink every drop,
Here's c----in a bumper wherever she goes.
Your high-sounding titles that kings can create
Derive all theie lusnre and weight from the donor ;
But c—■— can despise all the mockery of state,
For she's in herself the true fountain of honour.

64                       burns' merry muses.
She fixes for life the title of wife,
In her does the husband his honour repose,
Her titles are bright, all in her own right,
Here's c------in a bumper wherever she goes,
In rags or brocades she is equally great,
Her fountain gives rapture to all that bathe in it ;
On a rush bottom chair or a down bed of state
To bliss we're transported in less than a minute.
She's banished all care, is a foe to despair,
She's the loveliest Lethe te soften our woes ;
Nothing nature can boast can rival the toast,
Of c-----in a bumper wherever she goes.
Your wiseacre critics are puzzling their brains
How crowns and coronets first came in fashion ;
But a peep at her would have saved them the pains,
For c-----wore a coronet since his creation.
A title so old, never bartered for Gold,
The whole British Peerage would vainly oppose ;
Then let Mother Eve due homage receive,
Here's c-----in a bumper wherever she goes.
That Peers on the trial of peers are to sit.
Is thesr highest distinction beyond all denial ;
But------, though untitled by patent or writ,
Can bring sou jure, even kings to a trial.
Condemned to wear horns, poor G-----r scorns
The judgment he passes on impotent beaux ;
So justly severe may she ever appear
Here's c----- in a bumper wherever she goes.
That noble are born the advisers of kings,
Is a maxim established in every free nation ;
Then sure a just claim to that title she brings,
Whose rhetoric effected the great Reformation.
Teo' Charles lent his ears to his periwig,
Yer c----was the counsellor under the rose,
She whispered her mind, the Commons grew kind ;
Here's c------in a pumper wherever she goes.
That nobles are sentenced to die by the axe
For breach of allegiance, we all must have read it;
Thus c-----, when the bond of decorum she cracks*
Like a Queen or a Princess, is always beheaded.

burns' merry muses.                       65
The King without fees, will execute these,
While none but the hangman will meddle with those;
Then since from the throne such deference is shown,
Here's c-----in a bumper wherever she goes.
Your stars and your garters and ribbons profuse,
And white coats of arms that a beggar might quarter,
How faint are the splendour, how trifling their use,
Compared with the star that shines over the garter.
The star in the front is the emblem of c-----,
In a lovely field argent, crown, sable she glows,
And two rampant p-----s as supporters we fix,
Here's c------in a bumper wherever she goes
THE BROWN ------ OF OLD ENGLAND.
Tine " The Roast Beef of Old E?igland."
When mighty brown------were the Englishman's taste*
With strong curled hair that could tie round the waist.
Our offspring were stout, and our wives were all chaste
Oh ! the brown -----of old England,
And oh ! the old English brown------.
But since we have learned from all-vapouring France,
To ----- and to-----as well as to dance,
To a juicy brown-----we're afraid to advance.
Oh ! the brown, Ac.
Our fathers of old were robust, stout, and strong,
And had-----, reports says, full twelve inches long,
Which made their plump dames rejoice in this song.
Oh ! the large, &c.
But now we're dwindled to-I'll tell you what,
A sneaking poor race of small hunters, most hot,
And a-----of nine inches is hard to be got.
Oh ! the large, &c.
King Edward the Third, for his------was renowned,
Had a------thirteen inches before he was crowned,
He------■ all the ladies, and never lost ground.
Oh ! the large, &c.
King Henry the Eighth, as recorded of old,
Had swinging large cods, as you've often been told,
And his royal p------was a sight to behold.
Oh ! the large, &c.

6*6                       burns' merry muses.
In those days our sailor's fought much on the main,
They walloped the proud Spaniard , again and again₇
Then f — ■ d all wives, widows, and daughters in Spain*
Oh I the large, &c.
King James when he travelled the throne to ascend,
In Yorkshire he found a brown c------to commend,
And f-----it, then said, there's no p------but would
spend.
With the brown, &c
Then, then, we were able to f-----or to fight,
Our swords, always drawn, and our p------always
right,
But we're a parcel shiddle-come-sh——,
Oh! the large, &c.
GREEN LEAVES ON THE GREEN, OH I
There lived a wife on the top of yon hill,
Green leaves on the green, oh !
She sells good ale to* gentlemen,
And you know very well what I mean, oh I
There were sailors riding by,
Green leaves, &c,
They called for some ale because they were dry,
And you know, &c.
After one bottle they called for another,
Green leaves,. &c,
The one for the daughter, the other the mother,
And you know, &c.
The daughter soon grew sick and faint,
Green leaves, &c.
She said she'd lie down, 'twould ease her complaint,
And you know, &c.
Jack Tar he also grew queer and sick,,
Green leaves, &c,
is trouble it was a standing------₉
And you know* &c,

burns' merry muses.                       67
They have put them both in a bed together,
Green leaves, &c.,
To see if the one would cure the other,
And you know, &c.
She put her right hand over his thigh,
Green leaves, &c,
And found a stiff thing standing by,
And you know, &e.
What is this, my dear ? she says,
Green leaves, &c.,
It's Billy, my Nag, my dear, he says,
And you know, &c.
He put his right hand over her thigh,
Green leaves, &c,
And found a thing like a pigeon-pie,
And you know, &c.
What is this, my dear ? he says,
Green leaves, &c,
It's my Green Meadow, my dear, she says,
And you know, &c.
And in my meadow there springs a well,
Green leaves, &c ,
And Billy, your Nag may f------his fill,
And you know, &c.
If Billy, my Nag, should chance to fall in,
Green leaves, &c.,
He must hold by the bush that grows on the brim,
And you know, &c
What if the bush should chance to be rotten ?
Green leaves, &c,
He must f------up and down till he comes to the
bottom,
And you know, &e.
THE RIDE IN LONDON.
As I went through London City,
'Twas at twelve o'clock at night,
There I saw a damsel pretty,
Washing her jock by candlelight.

68                       burns' merry muses.
When she washed it, then she dried it, ,^:
The hair was black as coal upon't
In all my life T never saw
A girl that had so fine a-----,        ^;                  *
My dear, said I, what shall I give thee
For ago at—you know what ?
Half-a-crown, if you are willing,
Tw~o shillings, or you shall not.
Eighteen pence my dear, I'll give thee,
Twenty pence, or not at all.
With all my heart; it is a bargain
So up she mounts a cobler's stall.
My dear said I, how shall I ride you
v            The gallop, amble, or the trot ?
The amble is the easiest pace, sir,. ; , ,
With all my heart, so up I got.
The envious cobbler heard our parley,
And through a hole he thrust his awl,
Which pricked my girl right in her a—liole,
And threw the rider from the stall
LULLABY.
Nancy on a sofa lying,
Caught by chance my raptured eye
⁵ Twixt her lilly thighs I gently,
Sighing placed my Lullaby,
Lullaby, lullaby, lullaby, lullaby,
Sighing, placed my lullaby.
Quickly waking with the motion,
Thus the lovely maid did cry,
" Women fears, they've all a notion, ;•■
How I'm soothed by lullaby.'
Lullaby, lullaby etc.
Seven times in transporting blisses,
Each did with the other vie,
Still her hand fresh vigour courting,
Asked again for lullaby,
Lullaby, lullaby, etc.

BURN'S^ MERRY MUSES.                              6$
* 'Tell me, dearest youth, if heaven
Be like this, then let me die ;
Everj night repeat the seven,
Kill me with your Lullaby,"
Lullaby, lullaby, etc.
BURLESQUE ON "STELLA, DABLING OF
THE MUSES."
Kitty, dearer than the Muses,
Fairer far than anything,
Though I; did, when at Peg Hughes's,
From your------imbibe a sting
While myp-----enraptured traces,
All your parts for joy designed,
All the corners, all the mazes,
I in vain do strive to find.
Love and joy and admiration,
Cause my p— at once to rise,
Words can never paint my passion
When your c-----'s before my eyes*
Lavish nature thee adorning,
O'er yours thighs and smock has spread
Floweri that might shame the morning,
Shining like the Tyrian red.
But, alas! too weak my will is,
Where strong hair in knots combine,
Whoring Jove, or stout Achilles,
Might have p——s for c-----s like thine.
Could my cods, in best condition,
G-ive your c------ its utmost due,
Lovely Kitty, their ambition
Would be to beslobber you.
THE WISHES.
Tune—"Suppose I should ask from those Lips a Kiss."
I wish, my dear Nelly, you were an oat cake,
Then on the like butter I'd spread,
Or wert thou a floweret most sweet, for thy sake,
Like a bee would I suck till I'm dead.

70                              BURN'S* MERRY MUSES.                " - ■ .
Or wert thou a negus, with acid best pleased,
A lemon I'd instantly prove,
And give myself up to be tickled and squeezed?
Into the lips of my love,
And wert thou converted to punch in a bowl,
How gladly thy ladle I'd be ;
To stir up the treasure and joy>of my soul,
To fill thee out frolic and free
Or wert thou a garden all covered with weed», •
Unplanted with flower or tree ;
In thee I would set all my fruit and my seed,
And day and night dig into thee.
Or wert thou a hogshead of sparkling wine,
Kept safe in a vault under lock,
I'd taste thee and tap thee, while potent and fine,
And put in thy body my cock.
Or wert thou a mortar for pounding strong spice,
A pestle I'd be as your slave,
For thee I woud bustle and stir in a trice,
What more would Nelly then have
Or wert thou transmuted into a milk churn,
I'd then be your staff on your beam ;
My milk I would yield, lovely maid in my tum„
And give for your butter my cream.
ROGER AND MOLLY.
Beneath a weeping willow's shade,
Melting with love, fair Molly laid,
Her cows were feeding by.
By turns she knit, by turns she sung,
While ever flowed from Molly's tongue,
•' How deep in love am I."
Young Roger chanced to stroll along,            ' ^v
And hearing Molly's amorous song,
And now and then a sigh.
Straight o'er the hedge he made his way,
And join'd with Molly in her lay,
" How deep in love am I."

BURNS' MERRY MUSES.                               71
The quick surprise made Molly blush ;
" How rude," she cried, ^l\ now pray be hush."
But showed a yielding eye ;
'* My needle's bent, my worsted's broke ;.         .* ' '
Roger, I only meant in joke,
How deep in love am I."
" Your'e rude,—get out,— I won't be kissed ;
Pray don't —yes do,—begone,—persist ;
¹         Roger, I vow I'll cry.
What are you at, you roguish swain ? "
He answered in a dying strain,
" How deep in love am I."
THE VIGOROUS COURTEZAN.
Come hither, my boy, and down by me lie,"
My smock it is clean, and behold my white thigh,
Survey my soft belly, that's both soft and plump,
And besides I'm all hair from my -----to my rump.
The lips of my quira red as cherries you see,
And its cockles as juicy as juicy can be ;
But stroke it, and pat it, and f-----it apace,
And the -— that is in it will fly in your face.
Come lay your leg over, and be not so coy,
You son of a whore, yon f-----just like a boy ;
You have put it in double, I feel it run blunt;
It's a shame such------should e'er enter my------.
But, since it is in, I pray wriggle thine -----,
I'll lather your b-----and empty your tarse,
I'll spoil you from shagging these ten days nor more,
And call you a hook------son of a whore.
As stung with reproaches the amorous youth
Lay panting with passion he told her the truth ;
Says he, my dear Molly, in haste I let fly,
On the thatch of your------, and beslobbered yonr
thigh.
But raised by your hand, put it up to the hilt,
My------shall wag, and I'll double your milt,
I'll give you such thrusts as you ne'er had before,
Or call me a fumbling son of a whore.

72                       burns' merry muses.
Then pray put that pillow plump under my-----,
And with a good home push, push in your stiff tarse,
I'll straight raise your mettle, and tickle your cods,
Till in f------you rival the king of the gods.
Alcemna, nor Leda, nor Io, by Jove,
Were half so well f — as I then by my love ;
Sure Jove was in s-----■ a fumbler to him,
For he turned up my liver and made my------swim
THE BOTTLE.
Whate'er may squeamish lovers say,
A mistress I've found to my mind,
I enjoy her by night and by day
Yet she grows still more lovely and kind,
Of her beauties I never am cloyed,
Though I constantly sit by her side,
Nor despair her because she's enjoyed,
By a legion of lovers beside.
For though thousands may broach her₃
May broach her, may broach her,
By Jove I shall feel
Neither envy nor spleen.
Nor jealous can prove
Of the mistress I love,
For a bottle, a bottle,
A bottle's the mistress I mean
Should I try to describe all her merit
With her praises I ne'er should have done,
She's brim full of sweetness and spirit,
And sparkles with freedom and fun.
Her nature's majestic and tall,
And taper her bosom and waist;
Her neck lon£, her mouth round and small,
And her lips how delicious to taste.
For though, etc
You may grasp her with ease in the middle,
To be openod how vast her delight.

burns"³ mebry mttses.                       73
And yet her whole sex is a riddle,
You can never stop her too tight.
• When your engine you once introduce
To her circle, her magical bower,
Pop—away from within flies the juice,
And your senses are drowned in a shower*
For though, &c.
But the sweetest of raptures that flow
From the delicate charmer I prize,
Is sure when her head is laid low.
And her bottom turned up to the skies.
Stick to her, and fear not to win her,
She'll never prove peevish or coy,
And the farther and deeper you're in her,
The fuller she'll fill yoti with joy
For though, etc.
Thus naked, and clasped to my arms,
With her my soft moments I'd spend,
And revel the more on her charms,
To share the delight with a friend.
To divinity, physic, or law,
Her favours I never shall grudge,
Though each night she may a make faux pas
With a bishop, a doctor, or judge.
For though &c.
THE LITTLE TENEMENT.
O, I've a tenement to let,
I hope 'twill please you all,
And if you'd know the name of it,
I,ve called in Sportsman^ Hall.
This tenement I wish to let
To one who can it fill,
It's seated in a pleasant grove,
Beneath a rising hill.
'There's round about a pleasant wood,
To shade it from the sun ;
And underneath, a water springs
That pleasantly doth rum.

74                       burns' merry muses
It is a well contrived spring,
Not little nor too great,
Where if yon're hot you may be cool,
If cold, you will find heat.
This place is very dark by night,
And so it is by day,
But once you've fairly entered it,
You cannot lose your way.
When once you're in, go boldly on
As fast as e'er you can,
And if you reach to the housetop,
You'll be where ne'er was man.
On two raised pillars stand this house,
Yet though so high the door,
You can't get fairly in unless
you creep upon all four.
Yet let not this discourage you,
For ere you long are there,
What though your furniture be large,
You'll find you've room to spare.
I want a tenant very much,
To occupy my bower,
And if he is of the right sort,
He may have it for an hour.
He must be young and goodly hung,
And comely to the sight;
But above all the tenant must
In one thing be upright.
JACK OF ALL TRADES
Sometimes I am a weaver,
I weave both coarse and fine.
And for to please my customers,
It is my whole design.
In there came a pretty girl.
All for to weave her web,
I threw her across the treadle-hole,
Where all my tackles wag.

burns' merry muses.                      75
Sometimes I am a shoemaker,
I work with Venus bones,
And for to keep my leather fresh,
I've got a pair of stones.
Sometimes I am a baker,
I bake both white and brown,
And I carry the best rollin pin
That is in all the town.
Sometimes I am a barber,
To dress the ladies fair ;
I lather with my barber's pole
None with me can compare.
With my curling-tongs so hot, sir,
So well as you may see,
And so well I can dress up,
A lady's low toppie.
Sometimes I am a barn's-man,
I carry a good flail
Two supples and a hand-staff,
Well buckled to a tail.
And whene'er I meet a bonny lass,
I lay her on the floor,
I put my hand-staff in her------.
And my supple bars the door,           ⁿ

7§                      burls' merry muses.
IRISH.
FANNY'S BLACK JOCK,
As Fanny one evening I met in a grove,
Every look, every gesture, inclining to love,
With a black jock and belly so white.
With an amorous intention I quickly drew nar,
Dear Fanny, I whispered, your lover is here,
The birds tell no tales, and there's nobody by,
And you know that this long time I've had an hawk⁷s
eye
On yonr black jock, &c.
She seemed quite displeased and feigned a fright,
And in passion declared I should ne'er get a sight
Of her black jock, &c.
Dear Fanny, I answered, pray he not so coy,
While -lime's in its blossom love's impulse enjoy,
No counterfeit frowns shall restrain my desire,
For an Irishman never was known to retire
From a black jock, &c.
Love's impulse with pleasure she seemed to obey,
Lor she handled my stiff thing and led it the way
To her black jock, &c
And who can describe the soft transports we felt,
When in love's glowing flames every limb seemed to>
melt,
At one moment she died, and the next she survived,,
When in oceans of pleasure transported I dived
In her black jock, &c.
At length a soft sigh and a satisfied kiss,
Announced the sweet end of my banquet of bliss
In her black jock, &s.
All thrilling and panting awhile we remained,
In fetters ecstatic our limbs were enchained,
Till roused from her transport she bid me adieu,
And we then only parted our joys to renew
In her black jock and belly so white.

burns' merry muses                        77
THE ORIGIN OF THE POX.
Ere the world was yet troubled with dry-drinking
elves,
And ----, unconfined, ran about by themselves,
In frolicsome humour of merry Old Nick,
Once dressed himself up in the shape of a------
Derry down, &c.
With red flaming looks, so important and big,
With, his hair frizzled out like an Alderman's wig,
With one eye that's squinted both dreadful and qu^er
Derry down, &c.
Ills arms and its tackling he. hung on each side,
Peradventnre lest ill on his journey betide,
And quoth he (for something he's thought of a wag),
Like David I'll carry my stones in a bag.
erry down, &c.
Thus equipped he set ont, full as lech'rous as Jove,
To see how things went on in the regions above,
But he had not got more than a mile on the land,
When a nasty black hang-gallows------bid him stand.
Derry down, &c.
So I do (cried Old Nick), and cocked his one eye,
But take this as a lesson betwixt you I,
If you don't get away I shall damnably scratch you ;
But all -----• replied was. Old pintle have at you.
Derry down, &c,
So to f------both went, yet would neither give o'er,
He pushed and she pulled, and he sweat and she
swore.                                                           [blows,
Till at length he cried out, Pray desist from your
For look you, says P------, how I bleed at the nose.
Derry down, &c
Thus ended at length this most terrible fray,
When Satan went cursing and limping away,
And swore that for------he no longer would roam,
But contented would stay and f-----furies at home.
Derry down, &c.

78                             BURNS? MERRY ML'SES.
THE GREY JOCK.
As lately round Dublin Basin I walked,
1 met a young bunter and to her thns talked
Of a grey jock and belly so white.
Your------, you young hussey, is as grey as a cat,
Why, you dirty-faced thief, arid what signifies that t ■
If it's sable without, it is- scarlet within ;
Come, lug out your drumstick, and slip it well in
To my grey jock and belly so white.
I laid her down gently upon a greenspot,
My pistol I cocked with a brace of ball shot
At her great jock and belly so white.
What, only one shot, why I laugh at your folly,
Says she₇ here's a quim that can stand a whole volleys,
And though you can------as w^Tell as a Turk,
A peck of such-----will not do half the work
Of my grey jock and belly white
Drive gently, she cried, for my c ——-'s very sore,
Lie easy, my darling, or I'll bodder the more
At your grey jock and belly so white.
Then she cried, I will spend, my dear by, till I'm
dead_r
0 bravo, says I, my girl, very well said,
For your harbour of hope now lathers like soap,
And the hairs cf your------bind me fast like a rope ,
To your grey joek and belly so white.
With my fleshy battledoors I'll pay your rump,
Till your buttocks rebound like large balls at each
thump,
At your grey jock and belly so white.
I'll bump at your orifice with my stiff root,
I'll make you fine music with nature's sweet flute,
Throw c—s at your c—y like dice at backgammon,
Knock crab-lice off as large as scales of a salmon
From your grey jock and belly so white.
While thus I was bragging she gave a great sigh, ;:
Spent a deluge, and turned up the white of her eye,
And her grey jock and belly so white.

burns' merry mtjses.                     79,.
Dear Paddy, she cried, you do the thing right,
Six times in three hours you have f----me so tight;
.For she lathered behind, and I flowed freely before,
No quim in the nation could pleasure me more
Than her grey jock and belly so white.
LANGOLEE.
My name is McBrawn, from the heart of Hibernia
I travelled by land a long way o'er the sea,
And left all the girls round the Lakes of Killarney
In tears for the loss of my dear Langolee.
Langolee how he charmed and delighted th^m I            ^s
Oh, how their virginity melted at sight of him !
And how he entered their province in spite of them, ■> ,
Bathing in nectar from dear Langolee
Ye ladies of London, don't let your mouths water,
But quickly for remedy hasten to me,
I cure both the longings of mother and daughter,
And cram your dumb mouths with my Langolee.
Langolee, oh, if you had but a lunch off him !
Oh you would be a mumbling and munching him !
And in your pits over head ears drenching him              *
In the deep fountain of Langolee.
Tho' sometimes he droops like a rose in bad weather,
The sight of a lass makes him brisk as a bee,
Then he shifts is red head from one side to ther other,
And stands up to please you, does good Langolee.
Langolee, Langolee, so rampant and stout he is,
A good dozen inches from root to the snout he is,
Just the boy to please the maids without doubt he is,
Oh, who can resist such a Langolee ?
Take all the three kingdoms and put them together,
'Tis Ireland's dear creatures that keeps you in glee,
Arrah I what signifies England or Scotland as
brothers,
They all must fall short of my Langolee.
Langolee, all your wives teased with fumbling,
Your lasses who always lay tossing and tumbling,
One dose of my cordial will make you leave grumbling,
And dance to the tune of my Langolee.

SO                              BURNS⁷ MERRY MUSES.
TAE IRISH ROOT.
Ye botanist yeild, I've discovered a root_y
Adapted to females of every degree,
How sovereign its virtues, balsamic its fruit.
I hope you belive when you hear it from me.
Langolee is the Irish name of it,
Great is this nation already's the fame of it;
Make but one trial, and quickly you'll see
There's nothing comparing to Langolee.
When winter's keen blast are corrected by springv
The lads and lasses of every town
Dance round the Maypole, for Maypole's the thing-
Expressive of Lango's high frame and renown.
Langolee, wonderful medicine,
Sensitive plant and beggar's best benison,
How happy's the Island productive by thee,
Thou root of all roots, thou Langolee !
Ye matrons afflcted w^rith colic or wind,
Hysterics or w^That you may call it for me,
Restorative Lango, a medicine you'll find,
' Twill enliven your spirits most wondrausly.
Langolee, sweet is the juice of it;
Gently compress it, and gently make use of it ;
In city or country, wherever it be,
The sweets are the same of my Langolee.
Ye girls in thh city with nervous disorders,
If form declensions ye'd wish to be free,
Ye dear little gentles, pray take what I order_?
The Hibernian colt's foot called Langolee.
Langolee, to prevent imposition.                    *            ^
You'll get from none but the Irish physician _?
Made'up in triangular pills for admission.
The pectoral nostrum of langolee.